ObesityHelp

12/17/09 YESSSSSSSSS!!! Started my weight loss on Sun, today is Thursday and this morning, the scale shows a 5lb weight loss! I'm on my way. I've started, and I don't want to stop. Once this first week is done, I will add some soft proteins, cuz I'm just a little hungry and I'm going to add walking to my day. I'm starting off slow, but I need to. If I tried to be all gung ho about it, I'd probably fail. I will not fail this time. I am strong, and I will do this.

12/15/09 I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF!! I'm on day three of the 5dpt. Instead of adding soft protein, i've continued the liquids all day. I went to my nieces basketball game and at the end, my sister said "Lets go to Hometown Buffet!" As tempting as it was, I stayed true to myself and just asked her to take me home. I did tell her I'd go to a regular restaurant tho.  So we went to Mels Diner. I ordered a cup of chicken tortilla soup and only drank the broth, had a protein shake and a full glass of water!! Everyone else had spaghetti, chicken strips for the kids, and my brother in law had a full meal breakfast!! I'm so proud that I stuck to my guns!! Can't wait to weigh myself tomorrow.

12/14/09 OMG, what a year it has been.  I've been through so much the last year. I've had an appendectomy in January, was taken out of work in April because I couldn't function due to severe anemia. I've had 4 blood transfusions, went through a series of iron infusions, had a hysterectomy, and I'm going to have my gallbladder taken out in January and have exploratory surgery to check for adhesions. I've gained 34 lbs back. My weight is 212lbs. LOL...ask me if I'm depressed about that. But I was so severly anemic the last year, I wasn't able to be active. I have SOME energy back. I have motivation to diet and eat healthy again. I'm back and I'm gonna make it this time. I look forward to getting back to the gym and jog for those few minutes and LIVE again. God bless everyone and hope you have a wonderful holiday.....

12/22/08 Wow, it's sure been a while since I've been on here.  Still dealing with my anxiety issues.  Depression has gotten worse.  I've gained more weight back.  Kinda falling back into old habits.  Today I see my surgeon for my two year follow up.  I intend to talk to him about a revision.  I'm afraid it's something he won't do, but I'm afraid if he doesn't I'm gonna be right back in the beginning.  I want him to do tests or something cause I'm very anemic and my other doctors are saying I'm bleeding somewhere.  I have had abnormal menstrual cycles, but not to the extent that it's made me as anemic as I am.  I mean, they're threatening me to have iron infusions (kinda like chemo, but w/iron).  I'm freakn scared!!! I want to be back on track.  I was on Jenny Craig again, and was losing some, I had to stop since it's the holiday's and I simply can't afford Christmas and Jenny at the same time. 

We'll see what he has to say.  Wish me luck.  I'm deathly afraid of today's appointment. I was sopposed to be there in August, but I've been delaying it.  So.....here we go....


7/31/08 My two year surgiversary is coming up on august 3rd.  I'm ashamed of myself.  I just went back to work after being off for a year due to anxiety/panic disorders, depression, etc.  It's completely taken over my life.  I've fallen back into some bad habits and over the year managed to gain ten lbs, if not a little more.  I'm so depressed.  I feel like a failure.  I'm ashamed to go in front of family members who expect me to be a size zero now.  I'm ashamed to tell people I've had gastric because I feel that they're thinking, "damn girl, you better go ask for a refund!!"   I've tried getting back on track, but it's so hard.  I need help again.  Can I have a revision? 

1/22/08 Happy New Year to you all....It hasn't been such a great new year for me.  I'm attending counseling for PTSD (post traumatic stress syndrome) and it's taken a toll on me emotionally which in turn takes a toll on me physically.  I've gained a few pounds, as when I'm stressed, I turn back to my old habits.  So my primary doctor, who is like a second mother to me, is completely on my case.  I appreciate her.  She's the best.  So to say that I've gained some weight is very hard and has been very depressing for me.  I'm trying my hardest to get back to basics, but my mind keeps telling me to eat, eat, eat.  I don't eat the bad stuff, it's just that I'm constantly eating.  I can't stop.  So my counselor and I are working on this as well.  I need your prayers.  Please pray that I can get myself back on track.  

Much love....

10/10/07  Hello!!  Today is day 3 of the 5 Day Pouch Test.  Yesterday the family had gotten together for dinner.  My mom made tri tip, bbq chicken, asparagus, etc.  a big ole dinner!!  I was still on my liquid day.  Believe it or not, it wasn't bad.  I drank my tomato soup and then had a protein shake an hour later.  I had  sf chocolate pudding for desert (thats allowed as a liquid)!  I was fine.  I wasn't hungry, I wasn't dying to eat the food they had.  I was content.  So this morning I jumped on the scale......174.5.  Yeahhhhhh, that's a loss of 3.5 lbs in the last 2 days.  So I decided I'm gonna continue the protein shakes and I'll have homemade chicken soup as a meal.  It's basically boiled chicken breast w/lots of veggies.  I actually just had some and I was full with a fourth of a cup.  Yesssss, back to basics.  Thank goodness this 5 Day Pouch Test was found!!  I needed to get back into control. 

10/8/07  So today I started the 5 Day Pouch Test.  Day one, and it's all liquids.  So far so good.  No head hunger yet.  I've had two protein drinks and one 32 oz water so far.  Not tired, and I've even taken my antidepressent that would normally put me to sleep immediately.  Per my previous post, I gained some weight.  This am, I weighed 178, that's 4 additional pounds in the last 3 months.  This doesn't make me happy.  Makes me feel like a failure.  But I'm happy I have a chance to "start over" with incorporating the post op 4 week period back into my life, just doing it in 5 days.  I'll keep posting to report how this is going.  If you're reading this and interested in learning more about the 5 Day Pouch Test, here's the website:  http://www.5daypouchtest.com/index.html

9/26/07 The past few months have been very stressful for me.  I've gone back to some bad eating habits and gained two pounds.  This doesn't help the stress.  But that's how I've always dealt with stress.....eat, eat, eat.  I'm in counseling now to help me deal with the stress and the continuing eating disorder.  My online support group has posted a website that I will be trying.  It's a 5 day pouch test.  In 5 Days you can rediscover your pouch, get back on track and lose weight with your weight loss surgery tool. You have not failed! You can learn to use the tool again!   So this is my goal in the next week.  Basically you go back to the early post op days.  For the first two days, it's all liquids, protein drinks.  The third day it's soft foods, and so on.  It's the 5th day that you add your solids.  

I hope everyone is doing well.....And I know I will get through this.  With my Savior's help!!

8/4/07 WEEEHHHEEEE.....YAHHHHHOOOOO!!!!  I am now one year post op.  I remember the feeling I had over a year ago pre op.  I was so unhappy, so overweight, so unhealthy!  Today, I'm happy (I could be happier), I've lost over 101 lbs, and I'm healthy.  I don't  take diabetes meds anymore.  My legs don't hurt when I walk, my ankles can handle the weight that I am.  I'm a size 10!  I haven't been a size 10 since high school, and at that time I was a 9/10.   I love to shop.  My family treated me out for my re-birthday yesterday.  This is very special for me.  My sister Lynette is going to treat me to a full manicure/pedicure, my parents got me a gift card for clothes and took me to dinner.  Being one year post op is very special to me  because it allows me to acknowledge all my accomplishments in the last year.  I'm very content.  Now I look forward to losing a little more weight and then looking into plastics.  I've got the worst excess skin issue!   But I'm sure we all feel that way. 

Good luck to all who are looking to have this surgery.  I encourage it.  It's a life saver.  It gives you back your life.  To those who have had surgery...Congratulations!  Actually CONGRATULATIONS to all pre/post op.  You've made a choice to help yourself.  That's the first step.

7/4/07  I'm one month away from being one year post op.  Wow, time has flown.  I'm so very grateful that with the help of my surgeons, God gave me a second chance at life.  I've lost over a hundred pounds and I'm not that person I was close to a year ago.  I want to experience new things, I enjoy shopping for clothes, walking in the mall.  I'm not ashamed to go to restaurants to eat and don't fear that everyone is watching what the big girl is eating.  I always leave food on my plate.  Life has changed for me, and when I look at old pictures of myself, I'm astonished that I allowed that person to even exist.  I look forward to my second chance at life!!

6/3/07 FINALLY, A MILESTONE HAS BEEN REACHED.  AS OF TODAY, I WEIGHED IN AT 171 LBS MAKING MY TOTAL WEIGHT LOSS TO DATE.......................................103 LBS.  FINALLY REACHED AND EXCEEDED MY CENTURY MARK!!! 

THANK YOU LORD JESUS AND THANK YOU TO DR. FULLER AND THE UCD STAFF FOR HELPING ME ACHEIVE MY WEIGHT LOSS GOAL.  

 4/11/07  I've been on a little plateau.....but today I weighed myself and I'm down 91 lbs.  Just 9 more to become part of the century group.  A couple of weeks ago I had another milestone.  As I was getting ready, I noticed something very different about my body.  I HAD COLLAR BONES!!!  I was so over joyed, I called my sister and immediately started to cry to tell her what I found.  She laughed.  It's amazing what you'll find underneath all that excess weight.   I'm no longer feeling the need to binge.  I'm happy and ready for more clothes shopping.   

3/17/07  Not having a good day today.  I've been feeling a little depressed lately and wanting to binge.  Wow, haven't had that feeling in a long time.  My head has been strong enough that I don't though.  I won't deny that the thought comes, but I'm really afraid of gaining my weight back and being unsuccessful with my wls, so I don't.  I'm reading a book about eating disorders and it's helping since it's a spiritual book as well.  

Pray for me....Hope this storm passes real soon. 

3/13/07  Well, today was my 6 month follow up with the surgery center.  Everything was great.  Labs were all good.  BUT.....I have this little plateau going on.  I've only lost one more lb since my last entry.  Almost a month ago.  I'll be increasing my activity this week, and I should be down more...hopefully.  I can't say how happy I am though of my decision of having weight loss surgery.  It's given me back my life and my will to try and move on.  I'm grateful for having another chance and I intend on taking every advantage as possible w/this tool!  I was able to look Dr. Fuller in the eye today and tell him, "THANK YOU". 

2/20/07  Today was an awesome day.....went shopping again.  I tried got brave and tried on a size 12 pair of jeans....OH MY GOODNESS, can you believe, they fit!!!  I'm down 84 lbs as of today.  My sisters and I all wear the same size!! Well, ok, so I'm a 12/14, and they're a 10/12.  I've never been within the same size as them.  I've always been the "FAT" sister.  I'm so happy.  I'm very proud of my decision of having gastric bypass.  It's changed my life tremendously.  I have my feminity back.  It's amazing.   

2/15/07 Hellllllooooo!!!  Well, I'm six months out now.  I'm down 83 lbs...yeah!  I was out shopping today for myself.  I actually enjoy shopping and walking around the mall, going from store to store.  Pre op, I used to hate it.  My legs would hurt, I'd get tired. Now, it's like, only my feet will hurt cause I've been on my feet the whole day in new shoes!!  Well, as I was looking at the jeans, I'm struggling to find my size, 16 Short.  Finally, found a pair.  I went into the dressing room to see how they'd look with a pair of shoes I had found.  Hmmm, as I was putting them on, they were a bit tight at the waist, but yet, fit perfect and more form fitting on the legs.  I was scared, thinking, "Oh my, am I getting bigger?"  I looked at the jeans again......guess what....they were a size 14, in an ultra low waist.  Well, I'm only six months out and I have alot of skin in my tummy area, so ultra low waist isn't gonna do it for me.  But I was very encouraged that it fit in the leg area.  So I hurried over to grab a size 14 short in a just below the waist.....THEY FIT PERFECT!!!!!! Another size down.  So I got a little crazy, bought three pairs of jean, 2 pairs of capris, and 2 pairs of shoes.....I'm so excited.  Just to think I started at a size 26/28 in shirts and a size 24 in pants.  I haven't been into Lane Bryant (although I still fit in their clothes) in so long.  I go to the mall, or my favorite place, Old Navy.  Six months and going....more to come, more to lose!!!

1/15/07 It's amazing how we take for granted the small things!  My sister and I were out shopping.  We were both getting into the truck when I suddenly realized, that the truck next to us was parked really close.  Pre op, I would've had my sister back out so I could get into the truck w/out any problems.  Not today.  I got into the truck with alot of room and not coming close to hitting the truck next to us.  Then, when we got back to her house, I was washing my hands from playing with the cat, glanced in the mirror, and OH MY GOODNESS..........I saw something that was very weird!!  My collar bones were  there!!!!  I never knew I had collar bones!  I always wanted them!!! 

THANK YOU LORD JESUS FOR THAT!  lol

I went shopping today.  Boy, I sure have developed a love for shopping. I actually enjoy trying stuff on!  I no longer shop at Lane Bryant, I can now buy my clothes at Old Navy.  I'm very happy about that.  

Yesterday, I wore a new shirt and some jeans that actually was "fitted" to my figure.  I have curves.  I "felt" beautiful.  I walked into my sisters house and walked the cat walk to show off.  She was very happy for me.  But my brother in law was like, "OH MY GOODNESS LISA!!", he came to me and gave me a big ol hug.  Almost made me cry!  But it was very nice.   

1/10/07 WOW......197.5 LBS!!!!! 

1/8/07 TODAY IS A MILESTONE FOR ME!!!!!  I'M VERY HAPPY!!! I AM PROUD TO SAY I AM NO LONGER IN THE 200'S WHEN IT COMES TO HOW MUCH I WEIGH!!!!!    Ok, so I weighed myself today.  As I said before, as of 1/3, I'm five months post op.  Weighed myself today and the scale is at 199....back in the 100's!!  This is huge when you've been in your two hundreds for ever!  So I'm down a total of 75 lbs and anticipate that will drop some more when Aunt Flo visits....I know, too much info! 

Wish ya'll well...

1/2/07  HAPPY NEW YEARS TO EVERYONE!!!
Well, not a whole lot has happened.  I'm five months out and I'm down 73 lbs and expect that will drop again next week.  I've increased my work out activity from 3 days a week to at least 5 days if not everyday....also increased it from 30 min to an hour.....I feel soooooo good.  It's a great feeling to be on the treadmill and not being winded that I can't talk.  My sister is working out with me now.  As I was on the treadmill and she on the elyptical, we carried a full conversation.  I take the stairs every day at work.  I walk on my breaks, everyday.  I'm feeling very good.  The only thing I really don't like is the excess skin.  It's very ugly.  Of course I knew this going in, but dang, I can't wait for plastics!!  I've decided I'm getting the belt, inner thigh, arms (my wings!), and more than likely, a new set of girlies (boobies)!!  I'm too young to have them as they are. 

My health has been awesome.  My legs don't hurt when I walk.  My back ache isn't from the weight, it's that darn tail bone not being "insulated" as it was!!  lol....by the way, I've found things that I didn't know I had.....hip bones, collar bones, and feet!!!  My feet have gone from a size 9 to a size 7 1/2.  Funny how even the feet get smaller.  I can pull my leg up behind me to stretch before working out!  This is major because I remember the first time I joined Curves, I couldn't do this.  I barely could lift my leg and I had to grab my pants to stretch.  How embarassing huh...Well, I can do it now, and it feels great. 

I have self esteem I didn't think I'd ever have.  I walk with my head up and a smile on my face.  I try to acknowledge everyone I see by saying hello.  I have walls surrounding me that would normally keep everyone away, but slowly they are coming down. 

Guess what....I'm happy.  I still have things to work on, but I'm happy.  I'm grateful for the opportunity to have been able to have this surgery and gain my life, my health back.  To the staff at the UCD Surgery Center.....THANK YOU!!!

HERE'S TO A NEW YEAR FILLED WITH LOVE AND HAPPINESS...

11/12/06 Wow, I haven't been on this website in a while...well, i'm down 65 pounds.  10 more pounds to go and I'll be back in the hundreds...nothing to brag about, but hey, it's been a long time since I've been under 200 pounds.  Just when you think you've hit a plateau, the scale changes dramatically.  I've been having some mental issues with food lately and it's been a struggle.  Whenever I get stressed, I want to run to eat.  Reverting to my old bad habits.  Luckily I've been able to acknowledge it and I've been able to think before I act.  So I'm working on it. 

10/8/06 HELLO!!!  Well, I weighed myself today.  I'm nine weeks out and down 56 lbs!!! yesssssss!!!  I was so happy I started telling my whole family just how much I weighed, something I would have never done pre op.  I'm just 23 lbs from being in the hundreds again.  OMG....It's been years since I've been in my hundreds.  But after thinking about just how much my life IS changing, I started to cry.  I had to turn my head.  Later I told my sister just how it affected me, and she said she knew it and laughed at me.  Thanks alot!  nah.  I know she's proud of me. 

Well, like I said, alot is changing in my life.  I'm actually getting the attention of other people....yes, the guys.  It's very flattering.  I even allow myself to get eye contact with them.  I used to never look at people in the eye, because I didn't like them looking at me.  Now, it's like, hey you....look at me.  While I'm on this subject, I've gotta tell a story.   I went out on a date with an old friend last night.  Well, not to sound conceited, just a little more confident, I was looking kinda cute!!  :)-    Well, this other guy just happened to pass us up while we were sitting down.  Got eye contact with him and smiled.  He smiled back and kept staring at me.  I tried not to make it obvious, cause I didn't want to be rude in front of my friend.  But the guy came back and was just staring at me from the other side of the restaurant.  This used to never happen to me.  But I was very flattered.  I can't describe just how I feel, I feel so much better, so much healthier.  I just got back from the gym and did a mile and a half in 30 min, it used to take me almost an hour.  I'm gonna work my way up to 2 miles, I should be able to do that in 45 min.  The fact that I'm even talking like this is something else. 

Well, I strongly encourage wls.  It's saved my life in more ways than one.  It's given me back my life.

Thank you Jesus for being there for me and guiding me through this.  Thank you to my family and friends (and you know who you are) for all your support and your kind words of encouragement. 

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9/29/06 I haven't weighed myself, but I now I've lost a lot of inches.  My shoes are too big. My pants are falling off of me.  Even the underwear are starting to get too big!!!  Funny, but true.  My shirts look horrible.  I so need to do some shopping because when I wear these clothes, I look bigger still.  A look I'm no longer striving for!  =)

So things are the same between my "old friend" and I.  I find myself in a shell with my head peaking out and once he gets close, I sneak back in and put that shell back together again.  But I also find that I'm comfortable with him getting a little closer.  Whatever happens.............happens!!

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9/27/06  I'll be eight weeks out this Friday.  I've noticed a difference in myself....a confidence that I haven't had in a long time.  And I'm only down 42 pounds.  The best way to describe it is happiness.  I'm finding myself feeling more happy and content.  I smile at people, I get eye contact with people.  It's weird.  Wanna know something else weird.....

When I was in the 2nd grade, I met a boy who I used to share cinnamon sticks with through the screen of my window.  We were really good friends!  In the 3rd grade, he gave me a superhero ring!!  He actually left it in the mailbox for me to find.  I got into trouble by my dad who made me give it back!!  Well, in the 4th grade, we moved away, and then moved back.  We lost touch for a long time.  I saw him again as a teenager, and we actually went out on a date.  It was like no time lapsed!  We lost touch again.  Last year, he ran into my parents at a restaraunt, he gave my mom his number to give me.  Well, I lost his phone number.  Yesterday, I found it by accident.  I texted messaged (9/26/06 730p) him cause I was scared to talk to him on the phone.  He messaged me back at about 1015p.  After several text messages, I just told him to call me (1030p).  We talked on the phone from 1030p, and just got off right now.  It's 345am, 9/27/06.  We talked for five hours.  It was like we've been friends forever, like nothings changed, like time hasn't lapsed.  It was weird.  So much was said in our conversation.  He said he'd be able to pick me out of a crowd because he'd recognize my smile and dimples.  We eventually got on the subject of my surgery.  I told him.  I wasn't going to, but I did.  WOW, he was the most sopportive person.  He had nothing but nice things to say.  His sister had wls too.  So he understood.  It's now 407am, and I'm wide awake.  We only got off the phone because he has to get up to work at 530am. 

I feel like a teenager all over again.  It's weird.    

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 9/22/06  Hey!!! As of today, I'm 7 weeks post op.  I'm down 42 pounds, and went to my 2 month follow up with my surgeons office.  Everything is excellent. 

So much has changed in the last 7 weeks.  I got an ok from my doctor to get my nails done!  Finally, sugar levels are under control.  I went shopping for a new outfit for my sisters babyshower  tomorrow, and picked out one size smaller than I was pre op.  HMMMMM, what do you think happened?  IT WAS TOOOOO DAMN BIG!  Yeah  =)  So I picked the next size......YES, TOO BIG!!!!  My sister finally went to get me a size I haven't been in years...................fit perfectly!! I'm down a freakin total of 3 dress sizes.  Unfortunately, I still couldn't find anything to wear.  I think it's more of a body image issue.  All my current clothes are too big for me.  My shoes are too big for me!  Can you believe it, my shoes.....

My only downfall right now, is my head sooooo wants soda.  I hear someone open a soda can, and my mouth waters.  I won't do it though.  It' not worth it.  So I'll stick to my ice water. 

As I said before, my sisters babyshower is tomorrow.  I'm very excited.  My new little neice who is due in November will not know me as her fat auntie...I have another neice who is so very sweet.  She's 9 years old and told me she didn't want me to have this surgery because I wasn't fat.  She finally gave me her wishes when she found out it'll make me healthy.  She had me crying when she said that.  She's one of my biggest cheerleaders. 

Well, I guess I won't keep ya'll.  So everyone take care, God bless you, and be well.   

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9/16/06  At first I was concerned about putting the following information on my profile, but this is about my personal experience throughout my wls.  So....read on with caution...could be too much information, or just too damn graphic.......

For all the women out there who are looking at having wls and do not have a regular menstrual cycle.............BEWARE, IT COMES BACK WITH A VENGEANCE!!  I was diagnosed with amenorrhea (no menstrual cycle) and polycystic ovarian disease.  I was told that my cycle CAN come back immediately after surgery, due to the change in our hormones.  Well, well.....Aunt Flo has arrived and she's not nice.  It started very, very heavy.  To the point of changing every 1/2 hour.  On morning of day 3, I looked like I had been stabbed and I was dying in my own blood.  Every woman knows that when we're in water, it normally stops bleeding.  Well, when I woke up, I put the water on to clean up and nope...just kept flowing.  I became very dizzy and lightheaded, felt very nauseated.  I called the doctor, told them how often I change and discussed how I was feeling.  I was told to go to the emergency room immediately because I was loosing too much blood.  SCARY!  So on to the er I went.  They did a pelvic exam and some blood tests.  Everything came out fine.  Apparently, our periods can be this way after wls.  After doing some research and getting info from  my support group, it's not abnormal for you to start off extremely heavy then it goes back to a normal flow or vice versa.   I'm doing okay, and rather than Aunt Flo coming immediately after surgery, she waited until I was exactly six weeks post op and the day I went back to work to visit.  Aunt Flo is a bitch! 

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9/11/06  First and foremost, five years ago, terrorists changed the lives of the world.  I pray that peace will soon be found and may God bless the world.  Let us all try to walk in the steps of our Lord Jesus.

Today was the first day I did the treadmill.  I've been walking, but not long or far.  It took me a little while longer to recover on that left side.  Sometimes it still hurts, but it's soooo much better.  But anyway, on the treadmill, 30 min, tried to run but couldn't run for long.  I can't wait for the day when I can run without losing my breath immediately.  I felt so good after I got off the treadmill.  I feel like my weight loss has slowed down.  Of course it is when I haven't been able to work out normally and then my food intake has increased.  I'm definately not eating more than I'm sopposed to.  I stop once my pouch says so.  My sister is having her babyshower next week, and I'd like to lose another 10 pounds by then.  I've got 12 days to do it.  It's doable!!  Wish me luck. 

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9/10/06 I changed my song.  For some reason my video of Yolanda Adams just wouldn't play anymore.  So, I put Selena.  I love her and her music.  Her death was a tragedy to the Latino community.  This song is very beautiful.  I'm sorry to say I don't speak spanish, yes I'm Mexican, but don't speak it.  I still love this song.  Ok, so I'm not 100% Latina, I'm a quarter Filipina as well.

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9/8/06  Well, I had my first set of blood work done a few days ago.  Looks like my potassium is extremely low.  The nurse calls me yesterday and asks me several questions....."Are you having chest pain?  Are you vomiting?  Diarrhea?...."  The chest pain part got me a little worried.  Did you know that your heart needs potassium to beat?  HMMM, and mine was low?!  So honestly, at the time of her call, I couldn't remember if I'd had any symptons.  So she said she'd put me on a high dose of potassium and I need to retest in one week.  I picked up my prescription, read the information packet and it said it'll help you with "cramped muscles".  OH YEAHHHH, I guess I have had symptons.  My calves have been cramping up quite a bit lately.  I thought it was because I was stretching and I TRIED doing the eliptical.  Guess not.  So we'll see what happens in a week after I finish this prescription.  I guess everything else has come out okay.  She was only concerned about the potassium.

Unfortunately I go back to work on 9/14/06.  This was the shortest 6 weeks of my life!!  I was too busy trying to recover!!!!  JK...
I so need to get my a** back to work. 

My sister is taking my measurements.  I've lost 6 inches in my abdominal area...WOOO HOOO!!  I'm gonna measure every 4 weeks.  She's keeping a chart for me.  I'm going to try to post monthly pictures to see the difference in me.  She has the digital camera to keep it up.  I know my brother in law will do it for me.  At least take the profiles and keep it on their computer.  It's exciting.

Take Care everyone. 

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9/3/06 Well, things are going well at this time.  I had a scare a few days ago.  I ate some chicken, and it "got stuck" in my pouch.  It was so painful.  I waited 35 minutes and tried sipping some water.  It just made it worse.  It made me nauseous and I ended up running into the bathroom to vomit.  Nothing came up, but 20 minutes later, I felt so much better.  I was scared to eat my dinner later that day!!

My family and I eat at the same time.  We eat as a family now.  Little did I know that my brother in law would read this and eventually my mom found out how I felt.  I was relieved because if I had to tell them how I felt myself, I would've cried! 

I'm now down 34.5 lbs.  My bmi is now 44.2.  Still very high, but better than being over 50, pre op!  I'm in stage 4 of my diet.  I've been using those resistance ropes as exercise as well as the "thighmaster"!  My side is feeling a little better, so I'll be using the treadmill and hopefully moving on to the eliptical (ughhh!).  As we all know, the first two months is just the honeymoon stage.  Our weight loss is all due to the surgery.  Then it's up to us with the exercise and our eating habits. 

Hope all is well with everyone.  May God bless you all....Follow your dreams and with Him, you'll succeed.

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8/30/06  Today was a bad day.  Actually it was all good til about 430p.  Lynette and I were at my parents house and as usual, Lesley calls to see if everyone wants to go to dinner..........Round Table.  Yesterday they went to a buffet.  It doesn't matter what they eat, it's the fact that they go and as usual I'm staying to wait for them to come back.  Yeah, they invited me, but what the hell am I going to eat there?  I'm not taking my broth or my teaspoon of refried beans to a restaurant.  To make matters worse, when they come back, Miss Prego Lynette comes in with donuts.  I just think that was rude.  When we were on Jenny Craig together, she wouldv'e been upset if someone did that, knowing damn well she couldn't eat it.  So I just left.  I wasn't feeling very social, didn't feel like making an effort to feel social either.  Don't get me wrong, I don't care what they eat in front of me, it's that I'm just tired of being left behind. 

---->  It bothered me so much I went to seek assistance from my support group.  Here's their advice,

"It really is a matter of respect. You have to let your family know that you miss those times eating together and that there are other restaurants available that you can share with them and, that by making it impossible for you to join them, they are being very selfish and inconsiderate of your feelings. They may not realize that you feel that way. Tell them nicely."

Well everytime I suggest a different restaurant, no one ever wants to go.  They eat out so much, it's like they've already been there.  So we'll see.  It feels like until I can begin adding more foods to my diet, I feel like I'm gonna have to start isolating myself again.  AND WHOEVER MAY READ THIS AND THINKING "WOW, SHE'S FEELING SORRY FOR HERSELF", I'M NOT.  OUR FAMILY IS VERY CLOSE AND WE NORMALLY DO EVERYTHING TOGETHER.  IT'S NOT FUN BEING THE ONE LEFT BEHIND.

---->  My support group has helped me sum up my feelings....rather than thinking I'm feeling sorry for myself....

"It is NOT about the food, but it will take place around food because that is the time when everybody has time to "be together".  It's about real family conversation and togetherness.  I look forward to them all the time.  I simply wanna be part of the family dinners." 

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8/29/06  So I'm just a little over 3 weeks post op and down 31 pounds.  The seatbelts are starting to fit a little more comfortable!!  I've been trying to do some exercises, but I'm still very sore on my left side.  They say it's normal that I'm healing somewhat slower because I'm a diabetic.  Part of that left side is still numb from the surgery.  That's apparently normal too.  I saw two coworkers at Denny's.......my sister, neice and nephew ordered.  I just picked at my nephews mashed potatoes.  I'm still in stage 3 of the diet.  Just pureed/blenderized foods.  I was so embarrased because there was so much food on the table, and I was feeding my nephew, so I had a plate in front of me.  But one of the guys went back and said I was all smiles.  I guess I have alot to smile about these days.  Besides the soreness, I'm feeling much better every day.  I don't worry about taking my diabetes meds or checking my sugar on a regular basis.  I can't wait to see my A1C results.  I'm getting my blood work on 9/5. 

Well, hope everyone is well.  God bless you and whether you're just looking for information on surgery or have had surgery, may your journey be blessed and successful.

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8/27/06  Ok, so when they say don't lift anything over ten pounds.....LISTEN!!!!  My nephew has been running up to me with his arms wide open and crying.  He's done that several times since surgery.  Well, I felt bad and I couldn't take it anymore.  So I picked him up.  BAD CHOICE!!  Ya know that left side pain that takes longer to heal, well, for me I swear I pulled something.  I'm so sore.  It was hurting so bad.  I had pain anyway because I had to move fast to keep him from falling off the couch, so that just doubled the pain.  I'm feeling ok now.  But seriously, don't lift anything.  I don't wish that pain on anyone. 
 

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8/27/06  FIRST AND FOREMOST.......HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELYSE.....I LOVE YOU MIJA....Yesterday we had a birthday party for my neice.  She's now 9 years old.  Geez, my baby has grown so fast.  I remember when she was born.  I rushed in front of my brother in law and I was the first to hold her!!  Well anyway, they had pizza, fried chicken, rice, salads, and a whole bunch of the other stuff.  Oh yeah, don't forget the cake and ice cream.  My brain remembers how that stuff tastes.  I wanted to eat but I was so full off my crystal light.  My aunt, uncle, and cousins all said they can tell I'm losing weight.  I was waiting for the 101 questions.  But I beat them to it and just talked about it openly.  I felt good.  I wasn't ashamed that I had to have it done.  I was proud of myself.  Prior to the party, my cousin and I had a conversation about weight.  She's had some unfortunate circumstances in which stress has caused her to lose 30 pounds (she's now probly only 130 lbs).  I always ate under stress.  I actually ate no matter what my mood was.  But she was telling me that she has some nice looking friends who are always asking her if she knew anyone that she'd like to fix up....almost in tears...she's like, yeah, but you guys only prefer girls who are stick skinny.  So true.  I have guy friends and they'd never go out with anyone who was overweight.  It's really hard for people when society has a different way of thinking.  Yeah, I did this surgery mainly for my health....to live.  But I can't wait to be thin and actually HAVE a life....

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8/22/06 I looked at myself in the mirror yesterday.  I cried.  I saw a face that I haven't seen in a long time.  I actually looked cute!  I don't want to sound concieted, because I've never been that way, but really, I knew something was different.  I'm down 30 pounds being 19 days post op.  You can really tell in my face, not so much in my body.  You can tell, that my tummy area has gone down just a bit.  But I've gotta be honest, my body is soooo much bigger and will take more time.  Although some of my shirts are fitting a wee bit more baggier.  I CAN'T WAIT TO GO SHOPPING FOR NEW OUTFITS....AND NOT AT LANE BRYANT!!!!! 

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8/20/06 Well, I'm 17 days post op and I'm down 26 pounds.  So far everything is going well.  I can only eat a teaspoon of refried beans and less than a quarter of a srambled egg.  Literally, after 2-3 bites, I'm done.  Amazing, before wls, I could eat majority of a can of refried beans and easily have 2 eggs for breakfast.  My head hunger is getting better.  When I start thinking that something sounds good, I just remember I couldn't even finish it and I just forget about it. 

The only thing that is kinda bothering me now is that prior to my wls, as a family (mom, dad, sisters and brother in laws) would go eat together.  Now they're doing that without me.  I'm not gonna lie, I'm bummed about that.  Not because they're eating foods that I can't, just that I'm home and they're just living life like normal.  I've told myself over and over that this was my decision.  And I'm ok with that.  I just can't wait to be able to hold my nephew again and have all of us be together again.  I don't know, it's hard for me to explain. 

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8/18/06 You can tell I've got a lot of time on my hands because I've been updating my profile every single day. 

Today was my first day of stage 3  - blenderized foods.  I had a scrambled egg.  I used egg beaters, and after 5 min I was completely full.  It took me 45 min to eat 1/2 of the scrambled egg.  I thought I was sopposed to eat as much as I could of it within 45 min (per my wls guideline book), but I checked in with my support group, and I was sopposed to stop 40 min ago.  I've learned once your new pouch says you're full, STOP!!  I was also able to take my pills whole today and they went down perfectly.  So far I haven't had any reprocussions for over eating and taking whole pills.  I haven't weighed myself since my doctors appointment.  I don't want to get in the habit of this.  My diabetes is so controlled I may not even be diabetic anymore.  I'll have my A1C checked the beginning of September.  I can't wait to get my nails done again.  I am so in need of a pedicure!!!  That big tummy got in the way of seeing my feet, but now they're right there!!  jk...
I think I've lost some weight in my toes.  I don't know.  I can be retarded sometimes!  I know I feel smaller in my car.  I had to move my seat up, rather than leaning back. 

More to come!!!

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8/17/06  Last night was my first night in my own home.  Boy did I sleep like a log.  I woke up twice only to turn off the fan and to roll over.  Tomorrow I start stage 3 of the diet.  For the past few days, I couldn't wait for tomorrow to come, but today, I'm somewhat nervous.  An egg sounds good, but what if it doesn't agree with me?  What if it makes me nauseated or makes me throw up?  I hate that.  Like I said, I was never a good bulimic!! 

Yesterday I bought a dress from Target in an xl size.  Man it's skin tight in the tummy area.  It looked big, just not big enough!!  I have made it my mission to wear it anyway (only around my own home), and eventually fit in it comfortably so I  can wear it outside!  

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8/16/06  I'm 13 days post op and I'm down 20 pounds.  My bmi is slowly going down.  Started at  51, it's now 46.  Still nothing to brag about, but it's decreasing.  How exciting!!!

Well, last night was my last night at my parents house.  It was kinda sad to leave.  I didn't want to leave.  Ya know, there's no place like mommy and daddy's house.  I stayed the night at my sisters.  I'm going home later today.  It's like I can't wait to get to my own home, but then, it's kinda scary. 

I had a slight scare yesterday.  One of my incisions had some gooey stuff coming out of it.  But I called the doctor and since I didn't have any redness, swelling, or fever, I was told to just watch it.  Today there's nothing.  I was scared I had an infected wound.  Everything is fine now.  ***UPDATE*** went to my pcp's office as a follow up from my surgery, and she's confimed, everything looks good. 

Can't wait for Friday.  I can start my stage 3 of the diet process.  I can't wait to have a damn scrambled egg for breakfast and some refried beans for lunch.   I had my follow up appointment with my pcp today and told her how excited I was to have an egg.  Of course she encouraged me to have egg whites or egg beaters.  She said to stay away from the carbs and cholesterol.  I'm always hungry..............IN MY HEAD ONLY!!  My stomach is always full, but my head is always wanting food.  I discussed this with my pcp and she was very supportive.  She assured me that this is alot of hard work.  Food addiction is a disease.  Whoever thinks the surgery is the end of the process is so wrong.  There's so much more to it.  I'm very lucky to have the support of my family and my doctors.  I know I'm going to be a success story.  I DID NOT put myself and my family through this surgery to fail.  It's time for ME.  It's time for me to win.  It's gonna be hard, but you gotta think you didn't do this surgery for nothing. 

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8/14/06  Today, I found a song that made me cry.  Not for sadness, but because it gave me hope.  It's by the great gospel singer Yolanda Adams.  I loved this song so much, I have added it as the song for my home page.  My father taught me to always listen to the song's words.  Listen, and you'll agree, this is a beautiful, inspirational song. 

Just in case, here's the words:

Visions that can change the world
Trapped inside an ordinary girl
She looks just like me
To afraid to dream out loud

And though it's set for your idea
It won't make sense to everybody
You need courage now
If you're going to persevere

(chorus) To fulfill your life's purpose
You've gotta answer when you're called
So don't be afraid to face the world
Against all odds
Keep the dream alive don't let it die, if something deep inside
Keeps inspiring you to try, don't stop
And never give up; don't ever give up on you
Don't give up

Every victory comes in time
Work today to change tomorrow
It gets easier
Who's to say that you can't fly?

Every step you take you gets
Closer to your destination
You can feel it now
Don't you know you're almost there?

chorus

Sometimes life can place a stubborn block in your way
But you've gotta keep the faith
Reap what deep inside your heart
To fly

And never give up
Don't ever give up on you,
Don't give up

Who holds the pieces to complete the puzzle?
The answer that can solve the mystery
The key that can unlock your understanding
It's all inside of you
You have everything you need

So, keep the dream alive don't let it die
If something deep inside keeps inspiring you to try
Don't stop
And never give up; don't ever give up on you...

Sometimes life can place a stubborn block on your way
But you've gotta keep the faith
Bring what's deep inside your heart
To the light

Lovely words, aren't they?  Well, I fell in love with this song because, I didn't give up hope on me.  I almost did.  I almost started to not care what happened to me.  I'm fat.  I'm lonely and depressed.  Well, I made the hardest decision that we can make.  I chose to have gastric bypass, regardless of the possible side effects.  We all know what they include.  I can't be happier that I've made this decision.  I'm only 11 days out and I'm proud to say, I'm down 16 pounds.  So if this is what you want to do, go for it.  But be sure you're ready.  Do your research.  Ask questions.  No question should ever be left unanswered.  If you have a question that you're too embarassed to ask, email me.  Don't forget we're on the same road.  I've just crossed the street. 

NEVER GIVE UP!

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8/12/06  Can you believe it?  I'm 12 days post op.  Yesterday was my first post op appointment with my surgeon.  I can't ask for better results.  I haven't had any nausea, vomiting, or anything.  I got my staples out.  I was scared, but it didn't hurt.  It pinched more than anything.  My start weight pre op was 268 lbs.  As of yesterday, I lost a total of 11 lbs putting me at 257 lbs.  I got on the scale this morning and it said another two pounds down.  WOW, Results like this made surgery worth it.  I got liver biopsy results too.  EXCELLENTE!!!!  There weren't any diseases found and my liver is 30% fatty, which is very low for a big girl!   My nurse said it's only going to get better as the weight comes off.  I'm so happy, my health is great. 

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THANK YOU MY LORD JESUS FOR BEING THERE FOR ME, GUIDING ME AND SUPPORTING ME.  WITHOUT YOU, I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO DO THIS.
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My family is awesome.  I've been staying at my parents house since I've been discharged out of the hospital.  My mom was so worried about eating in front of me, she said that her and my dad would eat in the garage!!  Their own home, and they want to eat in the garage!!!!  No way would I allow that.  I'm strong enough that I can handle them eating in front of me.  It was hard for them at first, but they have since gotton the hang of it!!  Lynette is pregnant, and she really doesn't have a problem eating in front of me or for me!!  Just kidding.  It was funny, cause my other sister Lesley drove me to my post op appointment yesterday.  I treated her to lunch...........mmmmmm............Jimboys!  She ate while I fed my nephew and drank my water.  I was full though.  I was content.  I wanted to accidently drop some spanish rice in my mouth.  But I'm not willing to deal with the consequences of dumping or anything like that.    Besides, I didn't have this surgery to fail at losing weight. 

Well, that's enough for now.  Whether you're pre op or post op. May God bless you all and help you with nothing but success in your surgery.

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8/8/06 Wooohoooo....I'm now on the losing side.  I'm 5 days post op and feeling pretty good.  I had surgery on 8/3/06, UC Davis Hospital.  I checked in at 830a, went through all the pre op questions, had more blood taken, then almost an hour later, they took me upstairs for surgery.  I met with the surgery nurses, they got my iv ready.  I met with the anesthesiologist, and I told him, "just make sure I sleep through this entire surgery and I wake up after it's done!!"  He assured me I would be given a round trip ticket.  Before I was sent to the operating room, he gave me a shot that was just wonderful!!  It was so wonderful that I don't even remember being wheeled down to the operating room. 

Soon later, I was woken up by a couple slaps in the face!!  Literally!!  I was in recovery and they were waking me up getting me ready to go up to my room.  I was soooo thirsty.  I begged in a very hoarsed voice for some water.  Of course they couldn't give me any because of the anesthesia.  So he gave me a swab that let me water my lips.  I secretly drank the water from the swab.  yeah, I paid for it later. 

I was wheeled to my room, met up with my family.........FINALLY!!  I was so tired though.  I couldn't stay awake to talk to them or tell them about my ordeal.  I got beautiful balloons and flowers and a plant.  I love my family!  As it got later, they left one by one.  Lynette and Josue stayed until they got kicked out after visiting hours were over.  I really wanted her to stay with me over night.  But she couldn't.  I pretty much tried to sleep when I wasn't being poked or proded upon.  I swear the nurses were in there every 20 min!!!  At 5am, the nurse woke me up to walk.  She didn't even help me.  I got up on my own, and I was in sooooooo much pain.  I just about said every bad word in the book.  Even those that haven't been created yet!  I went back to bed after that.  Then my day nurse was there.  She woke me up to walk again.  Boy, talk about night and day.  She was awesome.  She got me up, walked without any problem.  She had me sitting up in a chair, I had my 2 jellos (about two bites) for breakfast.  My doctor came in and told me I had to drink 16 oz of water and keep it down in order to be released.  This was early in the morning.  I didn't finish the 16th oz of water until almost 545p.  I was so full, and could barely finish it.  So I was released, came to my parents house and recovering.

Now that I'm 5 days out, I'm walking alot, I'm still on my clear liquids and protein drinks.  I'm so ready to eat though.  It doesn't really bother me when my family eats in front of me.  Don't get me wrong, they all wanted to go have their dinner in the garage, but I didn't let them.  I'm getting my smelling sense back.  And I can smell food.  I dream about food.  But in my dreams, I'm upset when I'm eating and I can turn it down. 

This is the new me.  Ready to change. 

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 7/31/06 OMG, can you believe it?  TWO more days and my surgery is here.  I still don't know what time it is.  Today, I had my last meal.  My brother in law made some chicken adobo, steamed rice, veggies, and salad.  MMMM, I love his chicken adobo.  I went to Walgreens, pick up something sweet.  I soooo wanted a donut, but I got a small box of cracker jacks.  It was great!  I can't wait to get this surgery done with and get started on my new life.  I can't wait to ride a bike, walk without getting out of breath, working out, riding a rollercoaster, playing w/my neice and nephew, go out dancing and actually getting the attention of some good looking guy.  I haven't dated in years....and I mean YEARS!!  It's like I'd be starting all over again.  Scary huh!!!

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7/28/06  I've been thinking about my life changing surgery and have almost gotton to the point of having an anxiety attack.  I was driving to work this morning, and rather than having the radio on full blast as normal, it was off.  My mind was racing about things I have to do, things I want to do, and thoughts of my family.  I worry about them and hope they don't worry (too much) for me.  Suddenly I was crying.  I love my family and don't want them to hurt.  I know I'm strong enough for this surgery, but I still worry about them. 

Jesus, please bless my family.  Give them strength as I go thru this life changing endeavor.  Be by their side and give them hope.  Father, please give me your strength.  I have faith you will protect us.  Lord Jesus, I accept you as my Lord, my Savior Jesus Christ.  Bless us please...faith, hope and love.

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7/26/06  Today was my pre op.  I was there at 10am.  Saw the doctor, went over my history again and previous test results.  Everything was good so far.  Had to meet with the anesthesiologist. Went over all kinds of other stuff.  Then I was taught how to give myself blood thinner injections.  Hmmm, not so sure about that.  Scary!!  All done in about 4 hours.  So for sure I'm scheduled for Aug 3rd.  They're gonna call me with the time.  More to come soon....It's time to watch, "So You thing You Can Dance"...................Cause in a couple of months, I'm gonna be dancin my behind off!!

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7/24/06 Today I went in for my weigh in.  Lost 2.4 pounds.  Not bad for losing it just 4 days.  It was hard.  I want pizza!!  Nah, I don't.  Turned in my food records.  Got a phone call from my nutrionist just as I got home, and she gave the thumbs up...but rather than surgery on 8/1/06, it's now on 8/3/06.  That's okay.  I've been waiting forever for this.  A couple days won't hurt. 

I just ask that My Lord, My Savior, please bless me throught this process.  Please guide me to an uneventful surgery and recovery.  Please keep my family strong during my surgery as I will need them.  Thank you Lord Jesus. 

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7/21/06 Yesterday was my appointment with the hepatologist.  My diagnosis....NASH (Nonalcoholic Steatohepatitis).  So with this diagnosis, diabetes, pcos, sleep apnea, and all the body pain, I'm definately released to have the surgery.  They'll more than likely have to open me up since they'll be removing the gall bladder and doing a liver biopsy (for safety reasons and post op treatment).  So I'm just a little more scared.  I haven't lost the weight I was sopposed to.  Actually I gained four pounds.  I've since lost two of those four.  I got a scolding from the nurse, she's so skinny!  But the best news is.....my surgery date MAY BE 8/1/06.  It's pending if I can lose a couple more pounds in the next week.  I've been eating nothing but meat and veggies.  I've been swimming rather than walking since it's been soooo dreadfully hot.  So, we'll see.  I have a weigh in on Monday and that's when I'll talk more with the nurse.  More info to follow..............

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7/5/06 1221am  I've been home for a few hours. I was going through my email and found a messaged that was posted at GastricBypass-InfoCentral@yahoogroups.com.  One of our members passed just a few days after her surgery.  My heart is heavy with sadness, and I'm ashamed to admit with selfishness as well.  I'm very saddened that this happened and her family must deal with this pain.  But it also brings me to think of my own mortality.  I don't have a surgery date yet, it's pending based on results from a hepatologist.  I keep asking myself.....Are you sure you wanna do this.....Are you strong enough to do this.....Am I going to be able to handle any post op obstacles.....
I think any human being is terrified of any major surgery.  Each time I think of those questions.....I answer "YES!"  I want to do this, I feel strong enough, commited, and I'm willing to deal with any obstacles that come during post op.  God, please be with me....May He also bless our fellow brothers and sisters on OH with their upcoming surgeries and throught the post op period.......

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I had a surgery date for 7/11/06.  But due to results from a liver biopsy done over 10 years ago, my surgeon wants a hepatologist to look at my liver and make sure there isn't cirhossis.  My appointment is on 7/20/06 with the hepatologist, so I'll update with my surgery date as soon as I can.  Thank you ladies for your support.  I greatly appreciate it.
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