I am constantly talking to my 10 year old about ignoring mean girls.  Once they find your weakness - and they will - they will say almost anything to you to bring you down!

Recently, I had to get my head together, using the same words that I shared with my 10 year old.  A few weeks ago, one of my "good friends" planned to attend my 10 year old's ballet performance. I had not seen this friend in about 2 months. I shared with my "good friend" that I lost 20 or so pounds a day or so before the performance.  Well, on the day of the performance, my "good friend" did not mention anything about how I looked.  I waited a full week to ask her what she thought, and if she could tell that I lost a few pounds. Her response surprised me to no end. She says, "Well, did I say anything?  If I did not say anything, it means that I did not notice!  Furthermore, not only can I NOT tell you lost weight, but you look like you actually gained the 20 pounds!"

Well, needless to say, I was crushed, hurt and angry all at the same time.  I did not mention this exchange to anyone until maybe about 1 week ago.  I could not believe how these few words ruined me for a couple of weeks.  I felt a need to mention the conversation to my 10 year old.  She says, "Mommy, that was just mean!  I can't believe that Aunt ------ would say something like that to you!"  She was very upset.

I am not gonna kid you: I was truly messed up about what my  "good friend" said to me.  It was what she said, AND the way she said it.

What did I learn? Well, I thought you'd never ask!

My well-being was totally jacked up for weeks because of someone's stupid, irresponsible, unkind comments.  NO ONE walking the earth should have that kind of power over me! 

Kind, encouraging words from others is nice, however, It is my responsibility to speak kind, encouraging words to myself. 

I am responsible for my progress towards my goal.

Words can hurt worse than fists. I must remember how I felt when my "good friend" was so reckless with my feelings so that I will NEVER do this to anyone else. Golden rule: treat others the way that you want to be treated.

Today, I celebrate me - my past for making me the woman I am today, my present self, flaws and all, and and the me yet to come!

I love me!

I've already started slipping off track.  This is NOT good.  I took my children to a Christmas party this past Saturday.  I am supposed to be on pureed foods.  Naturally, there were no pureed foods for me to eat.  I had some potatoe salad and soft chicken.  Then, I had a cupcake.  Yup; a cupcake that was loaded with tons of delicious icing.  BAD CHOICE!!!  My stomach has been upset ever since.  Now really - why would I expect anything different? Pre - VSG, I began having difficulty tolerating super sweet foods.  Did I think that having a VSG was gonna change that?  What was I thinking?
When you know better, you are supposed to do better, right? Now I know! I don't like learning by the seat of my pants, but perhaps I needed this to happen just as it did.  Eating regular foods right now, and loading up on carbs like that is a sure fire way to disaster.  I don't want that for me anymore. I went back to pureed foods yesterday, and stepped up my protein and water intake. I am hopeful that this will help with the hunger pangs (I certainly did not expect to feel hunger like this!). 

I have also fallen down in my exercise.  I will fix this today. My goal is to make it to the gym. If I don't make it, I will definitely exercise at home for at least 20 minutes.

I have been feeling pretty depressed of late.  I returned to therapy after 2 years.  It's all good though. I am working on the new, improved me - inside and out.

In spite of it all,

I love me so very much.

I am in somewhat of a lull.  I am 16 days post - op.   I am at the pureed stage.  I am enjoying more textures.  I still feel hungry at times.  I mean, I get real live hunger pangs!  I never expected this. I am getting in all of my protein most days.  I am doing better with the water. So what exactly is my problem?
I need to stop looking at those before and after photos.  I am so happy for everyone who's lost weight.  You look simply marvelous.  I guess I am just so anxious to get there myself.  I am so distressed every time I look at my stomach.  It is still quite large. I want to go through my closet to try on some of my clothing, but I am afraid that they will still be too snug.  I was happy on Sunday, however, because I wore a dress that was given to me by my cousin.  I could not get the sleeves up, and the dress was too snug to fasten.  Now, the sleeves are looser, and the dress buttons just fine.
I think I am a little depressed.
I have a sitter coming over to watch the children tonight so that I can get some me time.  I will go to the gym, and get those endorphins flowing like a river so that I can get myself together.

I love me.

I literally have to pull myself away from the Maury Show, but one cannot help but get caught up in the emotional aspects of the show when a woman is eager to prove via DNA that a particular man fathered her child.
Yesterday, Tuesday, November 29, 2011 was my 1 week post-op visit at the surgeon's office.  I was so anxious to hear my progress, that I almost called the nurse Maury!!!! 
On day 7 post VSG, I lost 11 pounds, which is 4.55% of my total body weight. 
YOU GO, SHERYL!!!  YEAH!!!  KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!

I shared with one of my OH friends, that I find myself thinking about food a lot.  Is this the same as a craving?  I don't want to tempt myself, so after preparing my family's food, I mix my shake or soup, and busy myself, remaining in the room with my kids during mealtime.  I have about 9 more days of full liquids, then on to the wonderful world of pureed foods.

Since becoming serious about my journey, which was only a month or so ago, I've tried to step up my game. Before, I was never big on frying, but I used to buy french fries at the drop of a dime!  Just before I got real, I started frying more food, and ordering take - out almost 2-3 times per week.  Now, I prepare food at home for my 2 little girls whether I feel like it or not.  I enjoy trying new healthy recipies for the children. I enjoy presenting a colorful and nutrient - full meal for my girls.  So, the food looks and smells lovely, and it is obvious that I enjoy preparing it now. 

I am experimenting with my food, well, liquids as well.
I made a lovely smoothie that left my little girls begging for my glass! I call it my Tropical Smoothie. Please try it, and let me know what you think.

Tropical Smoothie
6 oz Mango flavored Greek Yogurt
4 oz sugar - free Strawberry Jello
2-3 oz 1% Milk

Liquify in a blender, and voila!!!!

I love me.