This morning curiosity was killing this cat. I wasn't going to do it until Sunday morning, but I couldn't resist. I stepped on the scale and it read 245.2 . I'm down 20lbs since Dec. 10, 2009 ! And I'm 3 days away from surgery. I'm sure you know where I'm going with this. That question popped in my head; "Well, I don't have to have surgery. I can do this!"  Reality set  back in, "Yes Amy, you do need this surgery!" Then "The Sabotager" step in my head. I'm sure you know about this creature. "Since you lost some weight, why don't we go to Sonics and get those mozerella sticks you've been wanting ? You'll be able to "get rid of it" at least by Monday evening."  GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!! All of this happened from the time I got on the scale until I stepped off. (Of course the thought of mozerella sticks have been on my mind since Wednesday! BTW, this is my week to crave everything. I'm suppose to be coming "on" next week-GREAT!!!!)

I'm excited about the weight loss, please don't get it twisted. I have a size 26 pants that I had on yesterday and I had to go home during lunch to put a belt on b/c they kept dragging the floor. This morning I tried on a size 24 pants I had in the closet and I must say they were loose . But I'm still Morbidly Obese. OOOOOOOK, I'm snapping out of it. I suppose what I'm feeling is normal. And I wonder if we fought this Sabotager will we/I be in this position?

As you all know, I started my liquid diet early (was suppose to start tomorrow 24th). I started on Saturday the 20th. It has been going well. LIke I stated in my last post its a mind game, TRULY a mind game. I say that b/c yesterday I ate a plain bagel w/reduce fat cream cheese AND a turkey burger (you know ones I cooked on Sunday). I wasn't hungry. I didn't have a headache. But my HEAD kept saying go ahead you dont really start until Wednesday. It was my head!!! The bad thing is I didn't feel guilty.

This morning I got on the scale and I'm down 4 lbs. from Saturday morning! I'm happy! I actually feel lighter; like I can move more freely (if that makes sense). During these last couple of days, I haven't had any mood swings, hunger issues, or anything else that you hear people talking about. Maybe bc I prepared myself for this day. I had already cut back on my sweet teas, so no caffenine headaches. I have been eating healthy & majority of the time at home.

My advice to any & everyone making this life change, start NOW!!! Especially if you are pre-op, start making the changes to improve your life/health. Eat right, cut back, and exercise. GET MOVING!!!!