I believe that i have entered what is my first stall .. probably because its is that time of the months and probably because I just can get nearly as much of my liquid pure protein as I used to.  The past couple of days I have certainly been slacking on that .  Not because I just DO NT WANNA ( only one day was that way)  Mainly, because i am full - and have no desire to drink or eat or sip. I will also add that i have not been taking my calcium - there is not good reason for that is liquid does not taste half bad but i forget.  I do get most my vitamins and my cell alarm reminds me but ... ya kow.  

I will also add that the past week i had an epiphany on the toilet - I was near death and really thought I was going to die.  I will spare all the details as there is a thread about it but HOLLY FUCKING  SHIT ! I was 2 second away from taking my impacted ass to the ER .  The Surgeon could have used a lil more warning on this part of the process people. People need to know especially people like me who dint like to poop in the first place ( i know i have issues, i don't save it or anythng  but i can only go at my home and i just find it all  too much work and inconvenient at times.)  I have some OCD yes and I am ok with them.  On the flip side if you know of something that induced the BIG D please let me know

Well I am on pureed food which i was so SO SO excited about but then i started eating and well Like i said no desire ..not interested.  Things look great some smell delightful and nothing ... I went to my fav mexican resteraunt thought it was going to be hard ( i love me some tortilla chips ) they did not even daunt me.  I am i will admit slightly afraid to dump .. I just fear it ... I know you are supposed to try new things at home because of it but i am even afraid of that . 

Going away for the holiday and well we shall see -  so far the POUCH is ok with cottage cheese, ricotta and pesto, refried beans and refriedn black beans  guacamole, sour cream, applesauce( are we supposed to skin it ) and chicken salad pureed ( it was finely chopped- added mayo and water). I think Xmas we will have crab and goat cheese enchilada so I guess i am just eating the crab and goat cheese. 

ok - I gotta force myself  to drink this protein.

I am very excited as today marks my 3 week out from surgery.  I hav lost 31lbs. Awesome, I know.  I posted on my facebook  Down 31 ! and figured that those who know i had surgery responded and those who did also responded. The responses were obviously ; WAY TO GO J and AWESOME . I appreciate the support,  but i was a lil bewildered  on to how to respongd I mean I cant say thank you  because I really did not do anything. I mean I did by having the surgery and following my plan  but i feel a lil bad because i did not really do work to lose the weight.  This kinds is a sucky feeling  .. I mean I am so SO SO happy to be free of the 31 lbs but now i feel a little bittersweet.    Ugg ... way to ruin my high ha ha ha .. no not really but  geez I am so bewildered.  My lovely wife says i did do something ... She said I followed the plan I , drank the JUICE (protein )( ha ha ) and I walked and she basically tried to point out all these things but I dont know how that all makes me feel obviously 31lb lighter.  

I also dont see a difference other than my face looks a lil smaller and DAMN my clothers are huge ... BUt I dont see it really .. Oh well.  I am honored/humbled and so fortunate  to have lost the weight and so happpy and do feel a difference.

Mixed bag for sure ... Roller coaster of emotions !

Had my final pr-op visit yesterday. Chest x-ray and blood  paid all fees and did the pre-addmitting in to the hopital. 

I met with the surgeon and  did a weigh in and  LOST a total of 25 lbs since i started the surgery process - I think its anxiety.  
I asked my Surgegeons nurse about goals and such and she said they dont DO THAT ?  Odd .. i think.  She said that according to my height i should weight 137lbs really  Umm i think I would look like a skeleton.  But i was annoyed that there is not a goal or target  ?  

The other thing i find annoying is that people are down playingthe surgery like its no big dealand just standard easy s urgery - UMM HELLO .... I signed all those papers yesterday where they describ all the things that can go wrong and all the things that can happen and umm no this is not a standard routine surgery . Its abig deal and Moreover, Its a big deal to me because this is my firt time ever EVER being in a hospital as the patient ?

also, everyone keeps asking what my Last meal will be .... Really, i have no idea and oddly i am a vegetarian and  the things i am thinking about eating are all MEAT things like a pastrami sandwich and westerb bacaon cheeseburger or a hot dog  weird.. like isaid I am a vegetarian and have been for 17 years ... so weird... ANYONE?

Packing up ready to leave my wife and dog to go to Los Angeles and  have my pre-op on Thursday and Surgery on MONDAY , November 22.

Trying to make new friends on this board and trying to find a support group out in Nevada when I go home. 
The hospital where I am having the surgery has a weekly group that meets and is seems amazing. I have not found one close to home. 

I am sad that my wife will be here but at least she will come when i have the surgery and the day i go home. 

Sorry this is not much of a post but eek !

- JDUB 

So Yesterday I spoke with the surgeons office and TA-DA  I have a tentaive date set for the 29th.  YAY exciting right ..  But eek  My wife and I are under going IVF well she is  and if she gets a positive pregnancy result then she will have to see her Dr every other day in NV and I will be in CA for surgery.  She will not be able to help me out - Bummer .  I am trying to move the surgery up to the 22 but it just complicates things.  Kinda frusterated.   I wanna be here if she is pregnant and all that jazz but i wanna have my surgery THIS YEAR ( i have to otherwisei have to pay another deductible)  another complication is that my mom will be off work for the week of thankgiving so she could help me and be home ... what to do what to do ?