Thanks, Jenci! Sometimes we need the reminder that we don't all fit the mold set by the BMI charts, our doctors, etc. I know I can never see myself at the weight that my doctor set as goal or BMI charts says is a normal weight for my height so my personal goal is the 160-180 range. I'll see how I look and feel when I get to the 180 and then re-evaluate at that point. The 180 is my lowest adult weight ever and I felt (and looked) good at that weight.

my doc is actually super realistic about this which makes me happy - I set a goal of 160 for my 5'7" frame and he was like you know you might wanna think about 170 or 175.
Your right - don't stress just be happy!!!
good work!!!! Keep it up you will get where you need to be!

I'm lucky in the fact that my doctor felt that being around 205 at 5' 8" was a good weight for me. I've been on prednisone for RA for the last 4 1/2 mos and my weight's crept up to around 210. I've been beating myself up but I managed to run 10 miles last weekend and I felt great afterwards so I've decided to not stress so much about the numbers. As long as my clothes still fit and I can run like I want to I'll take it. Today's my 2 year anniversary of my surgery and while I wanted to be around 165 or 170 at this point - I'm not beating myself up about it. It's much better than 378 which was my highest weight ever.

Awesome reminder! I am 5'7 and when I asked my surgeon what weight I should get to, he commented, "I would consider this surgery a success if you were to get to 185." I smiled. I had set my own personal weight goal at 175lb. My mother, of course, disagreed stating I should at least be 140 lb. Urrr..... Maybe I can't hold 140! 12 years ago, I lost 112 lbs in 10 months and got to 170. Due to life stressors and not being educated enough, I didn't hold the weight and ballooned to 306, which was my highest weight ever. I just want to be me dictate who that is!

your telln me my doctor says for my height im supposed to be 160 to 170 and i can't reamber ever being that been over 200 most of my life

I am 5'3" and I started my pre-op diet at 238lbs. I am 13 weeks post op and weighed in at 160lbs. My surgeon and his PA are very enthusiastic about my weight loss so far. They keep telling me to eat more calories, but I am lucky if I can get in a maximum of 450 calories a day!
My surgeons goal for me is 120lbs. My personal goal for myself is 130lbs.
I am losing the weight so quickly that I am afraid that when I do reach my goal that I may have a difficult time of maintaining the weight loss.
I honestly do not ever remember a time when I was on a scale and it read 160lbs! So, I am quite happy with the results of the RNY so far!

I am so glad to hear you say this, Jenci! I'm 5'7"ish and the ideal body weight for me is the same. Like you, I think I would probably look emaciated at that weight.

My surgeon asked what my goal was and I said 175. He said that was reasonable and realistic. To be 175 is a lifelong dream. I put 150 on my target goal on here, but I will probably adjust it, depending on how it goes.

It will be nice just to fit in a seat comfortably, to not feel sick when I have to go to the next size up in jeans, and to feel like the first thing a person thinks about me when they meet me is not "she's fat."

You keep working it girl. You look FABULOUS and are a beauty, truly - even at your "before" picture weight, but you owe yourself the health you have gained with the weight you have lost!!

Beautifully written and very encouraging! I know the weight my doc says is ridicules. I just smile and say ok. I know what my goal weight is for me and I'm going to stick to my personal goal.

My surgeon told me 137# for my 5'8" frame. Whatever! I will settle for 175#. Sounds better to me :)

I disagree with the "it's good enough" mentality.... 185 isnt good enough.... its a LOT better than where you were, but in my opinion saying I wasnt meant to be 145 is a cop-out...

It is so funny that you posted this because I just had this discussion with my doctor. He set my goal weight at 125. I thought that 144 was my goal. Based on the charts though he said he would be happy with 144- 125. I can't remember when I weighed that except maybe junior high or high school. I see pictures of people on this site and some of them are too skinny. Being big "boned" all my life and coming from a a family that always struggled with weight, I don't want to be too skinny and bony. So I am afraid that 125 will be. I have always looked at the scale to measure my success. I think by taking pictures of myself and comparing it to the way I want to look that will be my tool.

I so appreciate your honesty. I have the same struggles. I am lucky if I am under 190 on any given day. My surgery is almost 2 years out. I am 5'5'' and forget what I "should" be. I wish I could quit eating my problems.

My doctor has been phenomenal with that and told me to let my body decide where it wants to settle. I am a numbers person, but he will not commit to it and I do appreciate that. I am 5'3.5" and now at 175. I'm 11 months out from surgery and slowing up in weight loss like crazy. If this is where I land, so be it. For me, I am less focused on that. I am MORE focused on caring for myself, managing my diabetes and being healthy. This is about 75 pounds for me this past year. I'll take it! Keep focused on your HEALTH, everyone! Congrats to all.....

I agree you should pick your goal my doctors was 178 and I felt fat and kept reducing it until I felt good, which was 138. I weigh 140lbs now and am fine with that, would I love to be 125 of course, will I ever be, probably not. But at 5'5 I think I am good.

What is a goal weight anyway? I never been normal weight. So how do judge a normal weight. I remember being 112 in the third grade. !80 in fifth grade. @50 pounds in high School. So what is normal weight. When never been a normal person. I finally quite forcing myself to get under Two- hundred pounds. I stress out so much. about where. I need to be. That can,t even enjoy the weight . I have lose. Because, I am always thinking . I need to lose more.

Jenci, I absolutely need to read this. I am a slave to my scale and have been since 16 years old. I believe that you are absolutely gorgeous at whatever weight you are comfortable.

Hi Jenni,
I have been on this journey and pre WLS for a very long time and I have always detested the BMI chart, especially being an African American Male. I weigh 330lbs and no body believes I am that heavy and I just want to reach 200lbs. I would be happy at that weight no less than 185lbs. I agree...we have to get to healthy BMI and weight that is most comfortable. Thanks again for your post.

Hey there!

When I had my bypass, I did supercede the weightloss goal, and got down to 135. I went in for a check up (yeah right), and he told me I was too thin that I needed to gain weight! Why would he tell an over-eater to gain weight? I took him to the extreme and felt like a failure...not because I did not lose, but because I lost too much. Well I took him at face value. I started to gain, and gain, and gain, and gain and 7 years later, no exercise, eting all the carbs I wanted, dumping daily, gorged myself til I was sick, I did exactly what HE wanted. When I went back, he called me a failure. "What's wrong with you" he said so elequently...WHAT??? ? I can't make him happy...too thin, too fat....well which is it?

I decided 5 weeks ago on July 13th, to hell with everyone, and I was doing this (again) on my own...

I am down 13 over all body inches, and am on my way to a much healthier me. I don't have a scale, but I am using a tape measurer as my guide.

I remember what I felt like at my 135 and I want her back. I am or was 179 when I started this, and I won't know for a while how much I weigh. I don't care about that just yet. I do care that my endurance for exercise has increased from 1/2 mile a day with severe chest pain to a whopping 5 miles a day trail hiking with zero effort.

Keep telling your stories. Keep reminding us that the honey moon does not have to end. I am in my own euphoric moment right now, and grabbing celery instead of chips is a great feeling.

Good on you for staying consistent to you!~

Rae Ann