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Surgeon TestimonialRobert E. Brolin M.D.Dr. Brolin performed gastric bypass surgery 25 years ago on 2 people that I know very well. I have known these 2 people for 27 years. They are well and happy. When I first met Dr. Brolin he remembered those patients from 25 years ago including details about their lives! When I met him again at two support group meetings, I was impressed by how he listened to everyone's questions and answered them so thoroughly. He repeated every question to make sure that everyone in the room could hear them. I met him again for my consultation. He was very thorough in explaining risks, complications, and aftercare. The strongest impression I have of Dr. Brolin (besides his surgical abilities) is that he truly and sincerely cares about each patient as an individual and feels great happiness in helping people save their lives. I am so confident to have him do this surgery and know that he will be able to handle any bumps in the road, if any. The support group, which meets the first Monday of each month is awesome. I am looking forward to working closely with Dr. Brolin for many years to ensure a successful outcome!
An extra note--surgery was 3 days ago and it went great! I was released from the hospital after only 1 night! I will always be very grateful to Dr. Brolin and Dr. Nihalani for all they have done for me.
Another note--I am now one year out and went from a size 2X to a size two! I look great AND I feel great! Thank you Dr. Brolin and Dr. Chau for all of the support you've given me during the past year. Knowing that you are always there to listen or answer a question no matter how small means everything--thank you! Latest Surgery Support Comments
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Hi Jill,
How are you doing
from your surgery?
You are in my
thoughts and
prayers. Take care
of yourself! Cathy
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I hope that
everything went well
for you, Jill, and
that you are happy
with the results.
I'm so excited to
read your update
once you're feeling
up to being on the
computer. ~Big
(Gentle) Hugs~
Click here for the surgery support page
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PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies ▫ I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size ▫ But when I start to tell them ▫ They think I'm telling lies. ▫ I say ▫ It's in the reach of my arms ▫ The span of my hips ▫ The stride of my steps ▫ The curl of my lips. ▫ I'm a woman ▫ Phenomenally ▫ Phenomenal woman ▫ That's me.
I walk into a room ▫ Just as cool as you please ▫ And to a man ▫ The fellows stand or ▫ Fall down on their knees ▫ Then they swarm around me ▫ A hive of honey bees. ▫ I say ▫ It's the fire in my eyes ▫ And the flash of my teeth ▫ The swing of my waist ▫ And the joy in my feet. ▫ I'm a woman ▫ Phenomenally ▫ Phenomenal woman ▫That's me.
Men themselves have wondered ▫ What they see in me ▫ They try so much ▫ But they can't touch ▫ My inner mystery. ▫When I try to show them ▫ They say they still can't see. ▫ I say ▫ It's in the arch of my back ▫The sun of my smile ▫ The ride of my breasts ▫The grace of my style. ▫I'm a woman ▫Phenomenally▫ Phenomenal woman ▫That's me.
Now you understand ▫ Just why my head's not bowed ▫ I don't shout or jump about ▫Or have to talk real loud ▫ When you see me passing ▫ It ought to make you proud. ▫ I say ▫ It's in the click of my heels ▫The bend of my hair ▫ The palm of my hand ▫The need for my care. ▫ 'Cause I'm a woman ▫ Phenomenally ▫ Phenomenal woman ▫ That's me. ..
July 21, 2008 3 days ago
Still no naked push-ups yet! It sounds like such a great idea. Maybe once I actually start I'll keep doing it. I'm in the pre-contemplation stage I guess!
What did I eat today?
pre-breakfast--dd med. coffee with milk & splenda--40 cal--this coffee lasts all day and I finished it at 11 am!
breakfast 8 am--1/4 dunkin donuts whole wheat bagel--85 cal
1 T. reduced fat salmon cream cheese 40 cal
lunch 12 noon--1/2 cup chickpeas and black beans mixed--150 cal
1/2 an avocado--150 cal
1/2 cup beets--40 cal
1 egg white--15 cal
a little bit of romaine lettuce--5 cal
snack--1:30 pm --- 6 Pocky cookies--60 calories
on the train--5:30 pm--one piece peanut butter salt water taffy--60 cal
snack--7 pm--met family at swim club---dole ceasar salad lite--90 cal
and eight sea salt baked french fries--120 cal
with organic ketchup--25 cal
another snack--8pm--dark chocolate covered diana's banana--130 cal
dinner--9:30 pm (now)--lean cuisine macaroni and cheese--290 cal
TOTAL for the day--1,300
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July 20, 2008--Sunday--Vacation with Steve 4 days ago
What did I eat today?
breakfast--1/2 slice pizza with ricotta, garlic and sliced tomato--200 cal
snack--starbucks baked berry stella--280 cal
lunch--1/2 avocado--150 cal
1/2 cup chickpeas--150 cal
2 egg whites--30 cal
1/4 cup raw broccoli--5 cal
(total lunch 335 cal)
snacks--1/2 pecan caramel chew--45 cal
coconut passion fruit squeeze ices--50 cal
dinner--mcdonald's hamburger--250 cal
small fries with ketchup--250 cal
(took an hour to eat over a 2 1/2 hour car trip)
late night--dark chocolate covered banana--130 cal
Total for the day--1,540
At a year and a half out, my eating is fairly normal. I'm able to restrict my calories and eat foods I enjoy. This was a Sunday on vacation with my husband.
July 11, 2008 on July 11, 2008 5:31 pm
Okay, I forgot the naked push-ups. I suppose once I get started I can make a habbit out of it--maybe tomorrow!
This is what I ate today.
breakfast--Amy's Tofu Scramble Pocket (180 cal) http://www.amys.com/products/product_view.php?id=116
after breakfast hot chocolate--the kind they have at work--(70 cal)
lunch--salad with chickpeas, beets, black beans, mushrooms and 1oz cheese (320 cal)
snack--three pepperidge farms milano cookies (180 cal)
evening at the swimclub--a bite of my daughter's salad (25 cal) and a medium decaf french vanilla iced coffee from dunkin donuts (40 cal) 4 mini sweedish fish (50 cal)
dinner--lean cuisine sante fe rice and beans (290 cal)
TOTAL SO FAR--1,155
(I may have another 130 calores later, but maybe nothing)--then total would be 1,285
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July 8, 2008 on July 8, 2008 6:03 pm
Today is my Grandpa Ben's birthday. He was born in 1901 and died in 1988. I call this the "best day." We celebrate so many famous people's birthdays--my grandpa was the greatest of greats--so I celebrate his--and I call his birthday "the best day." I don't do anything special, but I just think about him a little more and today was a fun day.
I was at the swim club all day. I looked down at my feet and couldn't believe how there is NO FAT on the way down--just a nice flat tummy!!
I probably looked crazy taking my own picture--but I loved what I saw!!
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July 5, 2008 on July 5, 2008 9:34 am
Yesterday my family and I were getting ready to go to the movies to see Wall-E. So I was scrambling around the house and getting my "movie bag" ready to take some drinks and snacks like I always do.
I got a bag of diet microwave popcorn, (140 calories for the whole bag), popped it and stuck it in my bag.
We got to the movies and my kids were sharing a popcorn and my husband had one. I opened my bag and took out my own "special" popcorn. I started eating it.
About ten minutes later I realized that I was acting just like my old fat self--bringing my special diet foods everywhere in a little bag.
I am not a fat person anymore and I will never be a fat person again. I am thin and healthy!!!! FOR REAL!!
I never see any thin people carrying around their little salad dressings and popcorns, etc. (In the 80's I even took my nutrisystem food to restaurants and had them cook them for me so I could eat with everyone else!) Where did all my special foods get me??? Somehow, fatter and fatter.
When I realized what I was doing, I immediately stuck the bag under my seat and shared my husband's popcorn. I am free.
Independence Day, indeed!!!
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July 4, 2008 on July 4, 2008 7:59 pm
One and a half years out today! Weight is stabilized and I feel great!
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July 3, 2008 on July 3, 2008 3:39 pm
13 minutes! fastest mile -- 78 weeks out
I'm getting faster! Today I did a mile in 13 minutes and ZERO seconds.
(13:00). I'm pretty sure it's the fastest I've EVER done a mile! Now I'm headed into the 12's!
This is how fast I used to go..
13:41 january 20, 2008 (fifty-four weeks out)
14:43 may 30, 2007 (twenty-one weeks out)
15:02 april 17, 2007 (fourteen weeks out)
16:20 march 12, 2007 (ten weeks out)
17:03 march 7, 2007 (nine weeks out)
19:41 march 1, 2007 (eight weeks out)
21:31 february 13, 2007 (five weeks out)
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June 28, 2008 on June 28, 2008 7:51 pm
I just ate something so good--so I thought I'd share it with you--only 110 calories. It's sherbert on a stick--but it's better than sherbert--it has orange peel in it...I got them at Whole Foods.
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June 27, 2008 on June 27, 2008 7:44 pm
Pic of me today--life is SO good!!
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June 22, 2008 on June 22, 2008 6:03 pm
Today was my first day back at the gym since my obstructed bowel surgery. It's been almost ten weeks. My surgeon said six weeks, but I didn't feel ready. I'M READY NOW!! I'm totally ready for anything. Even though I have to start light again and build back up, I felt stronger than ever!
When I was warming up on the treadmill I ran at 6.0 for a whole minute. That's a 10 minute mile (if I could do it for 10 minutes!) I was 1/10 of the way there! I don't have good sneakers for running. I never ran a mile IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. I have the fever now!! I want to RUN. I want to RUN FAST!! I will buy sneakers this week. I can't wait to get back to the gym and see how fast I can do a mile and compare it to my 54 week fastest mile.
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June 20, 2008 on June 20, 2008 6:01 pm
My Fairy Godmother
I'm really REALLY thin. I can put on any outfit in any store in a size extra-small or size zero or two and look great. I feel good about how I look.
Then tell me--why do I weigh myself 2-3 times a day??? What's the difference how much I weigh in the morning, afternoon or night?? What's the big deal if I do gain a pound or two?? I would still look great if I gained TWENTY pounds!
I think I just REALLY LIKE (love) BEING THIN and I want to make sure that I stay this way. I'm spending so much--(wait I should say INVESTING so much) money on tiny clothes--I would be upset if one day they didn't fit me. Actually, upset is not the word--pretty much devastated, I think.
On January 4, 2007 I had a visit from my fairy godmother. She used a surgeon as her wand and had him make me a pouch out of my stomach.
I watch the quantity of food I eat every day, like a human calculator, constantly adding up my calories. I don't restrict the foods I eat AT ALL, but I keep a count of my calories. Some days I only keep a ROUGH count. Some days I don't count at all. I feel like I will go out of my mind on those days. I feel content on the days I count like a scientist. I stayed away from counting at the beginning, because I was able to eat so little it didn't matter, and it gave me a break after 30 years of counting calories. BUT, now that I can eat an unlimited amount of calories each day, I have to count or I feel get an unsettled feeling.
I also feel like I need to constantly weigh myself (at least every morning and every night) to keep check that I'm counting the calories okay, therefore, not gaining weight.
I have to keep checks and balances or I feel LIKE I WILL TURN INTO A PUMPKIN AND BE STANDING IN MY OLD LANE BRYANT SWEATPANTS AND TEE SHIRT.
Cinderella promised to be home by midnight. I have my deals too. Nothing comes for free. There is always a price to pay.
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June 15, 2008 on June 15, 2008 6:39 pm
Happy Father's Day!! First we made Steve breakfast--then we exchanged cards and gifts. Then we went to the swim club without Steve, to give him some relaxing time alone. Steve met us at the swim club later for dinner. All day, Sarah's tooth was hanging on a thread--it had been loose all week. When we got home, Sarah lost her tooth in the bathtub! It was a cute Father's Day present for Steve!
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June 11, 2008 on June 11, 2008 7:53 am
I was willing to give up everything. When I decided to have gastric bypass surgery, I thought there was a high chance that I'd never eat normally again. I had a three-month-long last meal.
I was certain that I would never eat bread again, certainly never pizza. I wanted to eat my last bagel with salmon, because I knew that would be out forever. I ate my last chocolate, my last EVERYTHING!
I was okay with it. I was so emotionally ruined from being fat that the thought of never eating another speck of food (or eating just whatever I had to) was fine with me. Yeah, I wanted stuff one last time, just to remember what it was like to eat, but I really was fine with the thought that I would never eat any of it again. I was willing to do whatever it took.
LITTLE DID I KNOW--I would eat normally for the rest of my life!! My surgeon tried to tell me but I thought I knew better, because I saw so many posts here on OH of people who eat mostly protein and follow very strict "diets" So, my "last meal" was in vain, except for the ice cream. I can't do ice cream. I really do remember the last few times I had it. Coffee Brownie Fudge Ice Cream--in a waffle cone!! The place I went seriously had the best ice cream ever. It was very expensive and they made their own. It's so funny--RIGHT after my surgery, they went out of business!!! I couldn't eat that ice cream if I wanted to LOL. I have a nice memory of eating ice cream. I'm SO fine with the fact that I can't eat it (more than a couple of spoonfuls or an ice cream sandwich--I know--that's ice cream--but it's not like a cup of coffee brownie fudge, face it)
So, I eat just the way I ate all my life, pre-surgery!! (I was a pretty healthy eater--at least you guys understand that fat people can be healthy eaters and that I'm not lying. When you tell a thin person who has never been fat that you are a healthy eater when you are fat they look at you like you are a crazy liar.) Anyway, I eat just the way I used to, and can eat almost anything as long as it's in small amounts. I do get sick from eating sometimes. Things just sometimes don't agree with my pouch. Sometimes something will be fine, then the next week I eat it again and I feel sick. Those things did not happen pre-surgery. It's part of my new life that I have to deal with. I always try to eat whatever I can and try new things--if I get sick I deal with it. I never get CRAZY sick--just very uncomfortable sick--NOT hug the toilet bowl and lie down next to it and pass out sick. That is the kind of sick I thought I'd get once I had this surgery, and luckily that doesn't happen to me.
If I'm out at work or at a special event, then I am very careful not to try something new or to eat anything that may ruin my experience. So I have to pick my times. The funny thing is, pizza is my best food--it never gets me sick--so if I need to eat when out, I can always get that!
I think pre-surgery it is important to have the mindset that you MAY have to give up everything. You may not be able to tolerate chicken. Rice and breads may hurt your stomach. Ice cream may make you feel like dying. Sugar may make you hug the toilet for dear life. YOU JUST DON'T KNOW. No two pouches are alike. Be willing to give it all up for a new life. Once you get your pouch, experiment. Try to eat normally as soon as you're able. Develop your new relationship with food. Your pouch is like a new baby's tummy--start slow, introduce new foods one at a time, so if something bothers you, you will know what caused it. Be grateful for any foods that you can eat after surgery. Don't abuse food--be grateful that you can eat.
I thank G-d for the food I can eat and for my health every day (among many other things).
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June 7, 2008 on June 7, 2008 1:07 pm
Now that I'm 42, I realize that whatever I got from my parents may not be exactly what I wanted to get, but I am thankful for what I have. Somehow I came out pretty good, so I guess I got their best qualities.
The other day I was walking down the street and some guy said to me that I should thank my mother for the great genes she gave me! That's funny!! Well, my body does have great proportions, and that is genetic, so I guess he's right--it's still the funniest thing I ever heard.
My mom has always been very critical of everything about me. She has always said I'm just too sensitive. She thinks I should be thankful that she says it like it is. I'm sure she's wrong.
All I ever wanted was for my mom to tell me that in her eyes, I'm perfect. Even as a fat person--perfect to her--as a thin person--perfect to her--that I'm her daughter and I'm beautiful, smart, funny and ridiculously perfect to her. That will never happen. I think every little girl wants to hear that from their mom. If they never get that feeling that their mom thinks they're "just right the way they are" then they grow up looking for that acceptance somewhere else and sometimes never find it. I found it within myself. I am so in love with myself no matter what. Probably forever, that little girl inside me will still be looking for her mom to say "to me, you are perfect just the way you are." I'll never get that. But, what I will get is my own little girl to always feel great about herself. She will always feel secure that her personality, her "way of being," her looks and everything else is just perfect to me. I will always truly feel that way about her no matter what she does, how she acts or what she wears or what size she is--I will love her unconditionally and she will always know it through my words and physical affection.
I think that's how little girls form their personalities and body images--from how their mamma's make them feel. I have always felt terribly inadequate in my mother's eyes--whether it is the way I comb my hair, wear my clothes, do my make up or the size of my body--it's never good to her. I make up for it very easily by telling myself that she is wrong as can be, and she has no idea what she's talking about, and that I'm just right the way I am.
So, anyway, to get to the point, the other day my mom said (talking about how I look) "I don't like skinny people. You know how some people can't stand fat people? Well, I can't stand skinny people. I get physically sick when I see skinny people. They remind me of skeletons. Their heads look big and there is no body." She says, it's not just me, but all skinny people, so I shouldn't be offended. Is she kidding??? She is not.
I'm thinking when I was fat if she told me how teeny my head looked with my big fat body, I'd probably crawl into my bed and stay there for a couple of days. But luckily for me, she likes fat people.
My mom spends lots of time with my kids and she is loving, and nice and complimentary to them. She is always telling them how wonderful they are. Thank G-d. But I tell myself that if she thought I was wonderful she would have acted that way toward me, but bottom line is that she never felt that way about me. If I had to sum up her feelings toward me, I'd say she loves me but that I'm ungrateful, selfish and too skinny. That's what she's been saying all my life, minus the skinny part and add too fat instead.
In 1998, I went to this weight loss spa (Green Mountain at Fox Run) in Vermont for eight weeks. I saw a behavioral therapist. I really believed that if I had a note from my mom that said why she loved me (besides that I was her daughter) I would be so happy and whenever I needed a little "pick me up" I could look at it and be happy. I thought it would help me lose weight. So I asked her to write it. She said she was too busy because she was just retiring from teaching that year, and maybe in the summer. So I waited and I reminded her. Well, ten years later, I guess it's not coming.
It is great to watch her with my kids and see that maybe it's just me that she feels this way about and she can be a loving, happy grandmother to my kids. I know for sure she loves me, she just has a funny way of showing it. I speak to her on the phone every day. We have a pretty good relationship--but not the kind where I can call her up and we can go shopping or get our nails done or go out to lunch--that would never happen--she's not interested. But the good thing is, I can do all those things with my own daughter. The feeling that something's missing fades as my own daughter grows older.
Anyway, sorry to ramble on and on about my mom--and mommy if you're reading this, you know I love you, but I guess this is me telling it like it is. The skinny people comments just got me thinking a lot about things...(my mom says she doesn't read my blog anyway--she'd rather read a good novel and blogging is not for her--she is too busy--she just looks at my blog to look for pictures of my kids!) Ugghh...
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17 months out -- new pants pics! on June 6, 2008 10:47 am
LOOK AT ME TODAY!!
My old pants are size 14. Now I'm size 0.
Check out my flat tummy!! It's a freaking miracle!!
(oh, and no more granny panties!!!!)
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June 5, 2008 on June 5, 2008 2:20 am
Gained my first pound! I have not changed my eating at all. WOW!! This tells me that I will not lose and lose and lose until I waste away to nothing!! I am normal!! My body truly knows what it's doing, and will figure my best weight out for itself!!
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June 1, 2008 on June 1, 2008 4:15 pm
Someone just posted on the main message board that they were so upset because they ate a small brownie with some ice cream.
This is my response:
that counts as a fruit and a milk.
someone once told me "never pity the chicken" What she meant was that if you eat chicken and then you start feeling terrible about the poor chicken that died for you to eat it, well--you really should not have eaten it--you did not enjoy it and then it was a poor chicken that died in vain.
I took a big lesson from that. Make a decision to eat something. Savor it. Enjoy it. Take responsibility for your decision to eat something wonderful. Eat it slowly. DO NOT feel bad after!!!
Otherwise, why bother??
Once in a while, enjoying something like that is good for you. Skinny people eat ice cream all the time.
It's not about WHAT you eat--it's about your relationship and respect for yourself and food.
It really is a fruit and a milk, trust me...
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May 29, 2008 on May 29, 2008 7:00 pm
Today I had a few memories of my pre-wls life.
I remember going to spas and when the meals came feeling a panic that I would still be hungry after I finished the meal. I would look at the pretty dish they brought me and think--"omg, that looks so SMALL, I will starve here" Then I remember eating it and feeling fine--not full of course, but fine (I lived). Then I would try to explain to myself that the panic was for nothing, but it would happen again the next day.
That is one problem I don't have anymore--everything looks HUGE to me. I always leave so much over. What a pleasure compared to panicking that I'd still be hungry after a meal! I know it was not my imagination, or I'd still feel the same way now. WLS fixed my anatomy so that I feel satisfied after eating a small amount. WOW.
Another thing I remember is thinking up low calorie ways of eating a large amount of food. I think they call it "volumetrics." I could have written that book ten times over. I dieted like a supermodel for 30 years. That is why I was a lightweight. I probably would have gotten much bigger if I hadn't been so diligent. I would take a small container of eggbeaters (60 calories) and a whole box of Green Giant spinach (35 calories) and mix it with a package of Healthy Choice Manicotti or Weight Watchers Pepper Steak. That was a HUGE meal. I remember mixing a container of nonfat yogurt with 1 cup of all bran with 1 cup of frozen-thawed cherries. That was also a huge meal.
I'm so glad I don't have to think up these huge meals anymore. My body needed to eat and I found ways of feeding it to keep my weight down. Now I eat like a delicate little flower, LOL.
I'm so thankful for wls and all the freedom it has given me!
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May 25, 2008 on May 25, 2008 12:19 pm
Today is our 11th wedding anniversary. We went to Point Pleasant Beach. We love each other more than ever!
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I love food. I hate food. on May 24, 2008 11:52 am
When I'm in my comfort zone, like in my house with a bowl of oatmeal, I'm happy. I can really enjoy my food--the texture, the temperature, the feeling of eating.
When I'm out at say a party, I'm borderline miserable. Everything starts out happy as can be, socializing, etc., then if I eat something that does't agree with the boss (my pouch), I just want to go home and lay down. So I have to be very careful when I'm out to eat things that I'm pretty sure will be okay. Usually I'm okay with pizza. I just never know what will happen.
The other day I was at a Mother's Day lunch with my family and the first thing I ate was a bite of chicken. Big mistake. It went down like a lump of lead and I didn't feel like I could eat anything else. I had to go rest in the car. Chicken is okay if I'm in my own house and have access to a bed and a toilet without making a scene, but no more chicken out in the real world for me for now.
I get really hungry, can't wait to eat, build a great appetite--then eat a couple of bites, and good night--I'm done. So it's a lot of excitement and hoopla for about 3 minutes of enjoyment. Oh well... That's why I love soup, oatmeal, pizza and cottage cheese. They're good to me. They taste good, and never cause a scene.
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May 23, 2008 on May 23, 2008 12:16 pm
Ben and Sarah at a Lag B'omer barbeque...
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May 22, 2008 on May 22, 2008 11:35 am
When I was a teenager I was sure I knew EVERYTHING. When I got to my 20's I realized that I really didn't know so much as a teenager--but thought I knew EVERYTHING by then. Well, by the time I hit my 30's I realized that I really didn't know everything in my 20's but was sure that I finally knew everything!!
Now that I'm in my 40's I realize that I really didn't know everything in my 30's.
Can you BELIEVE that I still think I know everything!!?? How crazy is that?? You'd think I'd have the wisdom to know that by the time I hit my 50's I'll be shocked to see that I really didn't know too much in my 40's.
I just really think I finally know a lot--okay maybe not everything, but so so much. At least I can say I was never short on confidence.
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May 19, 2008 on May 19, 2008 8:28 pm
Here's a pic of me and my little boy in
MARCH 2007 (about 2 months out) and MAY 2008 --just about 1 year apart--
we both got cuter!
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I love shoes! on May 19, 2008 7:54 pm
I thought once I got thin again the last thing I'd care about is shoes. I'd be so excited to buy new clothes that I wouldn't give them a thought. NOT.
I LOVE SHOES!!
Tomorrow I'll add a pic of my favorites!
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Friday, May 9, 2008 on May 9, 2008 8:12 pm
I don't believe there is such a thing as cheating. I've been eating a little chocolate or candy since my third month (almost every day). I've lost 100% of my excess weight. I think part of my success is my respect for myself and my respect for food.
Even though I eat whatever I want each day, I am generally a VERY healthy eater AND I do keep track (roughly) of my daily calories. I stay between 1,000 and 1,500 calories per day. I am 16 months out.
My surgeon says--you've got to watch SOMETHING. It doesn't necessarily mean exactly what you eat--but you've either got to watch the scale, the calories, or something, or you won't know if what you're doing is working. I weigh myself every morning and every night and I generally watch my calories. To date, I've never had a month where I didn't lose. You've got to do what works best for you. For me, the scale is the indicator that lets me know if I'm eating okay or I need to cut back.
You NEVER want to think of yourself as a "cheater" It is not good for you. Think of yourself as a happy, thin person and you will become one.
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May 7, 2008 on May 7, 2008 6:59 pm
Today is my mom's birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!!
This morning I woke up and there was this HUGE fly in my bathroom. I have a really big bathroom with two windows and a skylight. So the fly kept buzzing around and trying to get out of the windows.
I had to leave for work. I had such a hard day. When I got home I was exhausted. The fly was still buzzing around my bathroom. I had to help it get out. I opened the screen (it doesn't pull up, it lifts out). I pushed it out a little and he couldn't figure it out--I kept cheering him on--and FINALLY the fly buzzed out of my house! I was so happy! When I pushed the screen I saw another dead fly--I felt bad--he was probably in the same situation.
Okay, it's confirmed that I'm crazy. I felt like I did a good thing--not quite as good as when I saved that dog on the highway, but still, really good. Oh--and the screen is broken. My husband is mad...
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May 5, 2008 on May 5, 2008 9:49 am
No plateaus! No stalls! I never had a month without a loss!
I must be doing something right!!
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Thank You Dr. Brolin...you've helped make my dreams come true!! on May 4, 2008 6:23 pm
THANK YOU Dr. Brolin!!!
Robert E. Brolin M.D.
4250 US Highway Route 1 North, Suite 1
Princeton/Monmouth Junction, NJ 08852
Phone: (732) 274-3434
Fax: (732) 274-3435
http://www.njbariatricspc.com/ http://www.njbariatricspc.com/doctors/brolin.asp
May 4, 2008 on May 4, 2008 4:24 pm
The other day I posted how strangers are always telling me to "eat!!" wendy_fou responded that isn't it funny that when I was fat no one told me to "stop eating!"
I was just thinking the exact same thing the other day--that no one would ever tell me to quit eating because I was fat.
ALTHOUGH--one time I was eating an ice cream while waiting on line for a bus in Atlantic City, and the guy in front of me said "YOU SHOULDN'T BE EATING THAT!!!!!"
OMG--I RIPPED HIM A NEW YOUKNOWWHAT -- I WAS SO MAD!!!!! AND--I was like six months pregnant (but you couldn't tell because of my fat). I'LL NEVER FORGET THAT AS LONG AS I LIVE!!!!!
WELL--I CHANGED MY FAT BUT I'M SURE HE DIDN'T CHANGE HIS UGLY...
Lots of people are idiots... (bet you never noticed that, lol)
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May 2, 2008 on May 2, 2008 8:55 pm
my vitamin levels are PERFECT... and I take two multivitamins everyday (almost).
but I am tired--I work a lot and have a very stressful career and a home business and I have a 4 & 6 year old--plus I had two surgeries in the past seven weeks, so I am a bit wiped out.
When fat people get over tired, stressed, etc. no one says boo, but when a thin person gets tired or a cold or something, automatically we're wasting away and too skinny.
when a fat person is tired--stressed--wiped out, no one tells them how fat they are.
wait--let me say that again -- When a fat person is tired, stressed, wiped out, no one tells them how fat they are!!!!!
"Hmmm, you don't look so good, maybe you're too fat--just trying to help..."
maybe I'm missing something...
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May 2, 2008 on May 2, 2008 7:55 pm
I told my friend that I am posting this because I think I look just fine! I told her that I will send her a link to this message so she can see what everyone says. So keep in mind she will be reading!!
My opinion--I know we always say the jealousy thing first--I honestly do not believe she's jealous--and I think she honestly thinks that I'm too skinny and she's trying to help me!  
She said "All along you've been looking drop dead gorgeous, but now you look like you're wasting away, and you're on the downward spiral--not your peak of sexiness and gorgeousness--your va va voom is going away. You look sickly"
You have no color, etc etc.... I'm on the phone with her right now getting it word for word
"It's not jealousy!! I've been happy for you all along because you're sexy and gorgeous--I admire you and I have been happy for you the whole time! But when I saw you the other day I did a double take because you were very pale and sickly I thought maybe it was because of your recent surgery, but it's not."
She says she's just trying to help!!!!
Well, even if I wanted to gain weight to get my beautiful self back--how the heck would I do that??? Force feed myself 24/7???
I think I look great like this and I'm happy with my weight.
Maybe she's right--because people (strangers) are always telling me to EAT!! I just think people in general are not used to seeing people of a normal, healthy weight, so when they see one it looks unusual. My BMI is 20.8. Underweight is 18.5. I don't want to lose any more weight.
This is me now--be honest--maybe I'm in denial???? I know I'm not anorexic because today I ate a black and white cookie, 3 milano peperidge farm cookies, oatmeal, some of a 3-cheese omelette, a half a slice of pizza, some lasagne and some fruit and some dry cereal--and I may have a snack later!!! THAT is not anorexic!!!
So if I am too skinny I can't help it, so if anyone tells me I'm too skinny they're doing nothing but making me feel bad--it can't possibly help me. I can't go on a feeding tube with liquid lays potato chips like Homer Simpson did--okay now I'm rambling, sorry!
Here's a picture of me from a couple of weeks ago--I love how I look and I've never felt happier or healthier. All my bloodwork is perfect...
(I'm still dreaming of bigger boobs since the girls have jumped ship this month, LOL--maybe that'll make me look more SUBSTANTIAL, lol...) 
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Uno de Mayo on May 1, 2008 5:54 am
I am exhausted. I've been working a lot and it's tiring--my company has five locations and they are not close to each other.
My job is keeping me from my poker playing, and for me that's a bad thing--I like to play once a week. I need to fit my poker in to be a happy camper. I like to play on Wednesday mornings, so I may start taking Wednesdays off (I work theee or four days (lately four) a week).
I need some "me" time!
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Me and my Boobs... on April 29, 2008 11:18 am
It's not like I just realized this today, but I've just gotta' say that I do realize that not one living person on earth cares about my weight loss surgery and my "pouch stories" or what my favorite snack is except you guys--people just like me--out here in cyberspace. Thank G-d for you!! Not only do you guys read this stuff, you really care!
I try not to talk about these things to the real world, but it's hard--there's so much to say and it's so interesting, LOL...
On that note, can we talk about my boobs?????
Seven weeks ago I had a full extended tummy tuck and liposuction. I swore I would never get another surgery because RECOVERY SUCKS.
Now, just seven little tiny weeks later, I'm wondering if I should get a boob lift or a boob augmentation. My surgeon said that if he just lifts them I may be a small C cup. I'm thinking maybe he's wrong and I'd be a large B cup. He thinks I should get implants to make them a nice D, which is what I'm used to. Would I be happy being smaller? HELP!
I mean, when I was fat, I was like a triple Z. My boobs didn't need their own zip code, they needed their own state. In the last month or two, I was wearing a 32D, but since I just lost another 8 pounds, I can't even wear it any more--I am a 32C.
Once he lifts, and removes skin and stuff, what will be left??
I was thinking it's cute to be skinny with a cute little chest? No?
Do I really need big knockers??
Don't they need maintenance like years down the road?
Can't I develop problems from implants?
I think maybe I should just lift 'em up??
Maybe big ones were so 2007, and nice small ones are 2009???
What do you think??
I'm seriously skinny--a size XS--does someone that small look better with big ones or cute perky little ones??
I'm so on the fence--on one hand I think I'd be SO happy to be a cute perky B--on the other hand I want to wear a HOOTERS COSTUME for my husband on Halloween!!!!
I have too much time on my hands, lol... I'm not doing anything until 2009--until then I'll just drive everybody crazy.
Please put your votes in!! It's a huge decision and I need help!!!!!! (Men are invited--don't be shy!)
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April 28, 2008 on April 28, 2008 4:27 pm
In the mornnings, I used to drink decaf coffee, then I switched to tea. Now I love Green Mountain Hot Cocoa! I have it every morning. It's 60 calories. I figure I put about 40 calories of milk into my coffee anyway...
This is my favorite snack:
Two Pepperidge Farms Milano Cookies and a cup of Green Mountain Hot Cocoa with one splenda. I like this Hot Cocoa better than any other because it goes in the Keurig Coffee Maker and it leaves no powdery bubbles on top/bottom. I never liked hot chocolate before because I could never stir it properly.
I don't eat those cookies every day--a few times a month. I think it is the perfect cookie. I almost always want a second one--but I feel very satisfied after the second! Two cookies and one HC is 180 calories--only 120 if you have just one cookie!
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April 27, 2008 on April 27, 2008 8:26 am
Okay, I'm pretty much back to my normal self except for a little dizziness which I think is from the antibiotic that I only have to take until tomorrow night. Now I just have to wait for my scars to fade. That'll be like watching water boil.
A long time ago, I remember reading about someone whose nose would run as a signal that their pouch was full and not to take another bite. That never happened to me. Unitl this week!! All of a sudden my nose starts running and I know I'm full. BUT, I'm already very good at knowing when I'm full so I really don't need the runny nose signal!!! Oh, well...
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April 25, 2008 on April 25, 2008 12:26 pm
Someone on the message board just asked if anyone thinks weight loss surgery is "taking the easy way out".
Here is my response:
Yes, losing weight with weight loss surgery is EASY compared to losing weight without weight loss surgery.
Some people can lose weight without surgery, and some of those people gain it all back and some don't.
I tried to lose it the hard, old-fashioned way for 30 years and wound up fatter than when I started. I had weight loss surgery and I'm now 125 pounds--5'5", at my high school weight. I lost 100% of my excess weight.
I could have NEVER done that without weight loss surgery!!! NEVER--NO MATTER WHAT. Maybe I could have gotten myself down a bit, but not this far!! This was the ONLY WAY OUT for me!
Life after weight loss surgery is not easy, but it is SO MUCH EASIER than waking up depressed and miserable every morning and feeling like there is no way out. Everything I have had to go through since weight loss surgery is far easier than crying every day--than not having anything to wear--than sweating under my boobs and getting rashes--than not going places I wanted to go or not doing things I wanted to do.
Living life after weight loss surgery is SO SO SO easy compared to living life without it.
Yes, to me it is the easy way out. If you are in a burning building and you have a parachute, do you take it to safety or do you muddle down the steps with everyone else, some of whom will never make it out of the building?
If you see an easy way out that works, and you decide not to take it, then I can't help you. Why suffer?
PS: There will be people that are jealous or upset, even angry that they didn't have a parachute or weren't smart enough or brave enough to take it. That is not your problem. No one can take care of you but you. | Click here to leave a comment.
April 23, 2008 on April 23, 2008 12:13 pm
So, I went to my doctor and this is what he had to say. I had hypo-tension with near syncope secondary to dehydration as a result of a urinary tract infection. My doctor said I didn't need to write it down! I said how can I put it in my blog if I don't write it down??? He laughed.
(I learned a new word--it means-- Syncope (SIN'ko-pe) is temporary loss of consciousness and posture, described as "fainting" or "passing out." It's usually related to temporary insufficient blood flow to the brain. It most often occurs when the blood pressure is too low (hypotension) and the heart doesn't pump a normal supply of oxygen to the brain.) http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=4749
He said I need to eat more salt and drink more water. He said sugar helps digest the salt.
I also went to the plastic surgeon today and everything looks good. The last ten pounds I lost unfortunately came straight from my boobs, so I'm thinking about taking care of my girls next. I'm too small to fill out my 32D's and I tried on some 32C's and I'm too big for them. So I'm wearing the 32D's on the large side. If I get a lift, I'll probably shrink to a small C. My doc thinks I should get a small implant. I'm very comfortable as a D, so I may do it. NEXT YEAR!! Noone, especially me, can handle another surgery in 2008!!
April 22, 2008 on April 22, 2008 9:19 pm
I went to work today. I really overdid it. I drove 135 miles and went to three of our stores. I was dizzy some of the time (not while driving) and just rested. I left my house at 6:30 am and got home at 9:30 pm. I was full force--so happy to kick some butt at work and get back into the swing of my crazy job, while at the same time not feeling good at all. A little swollen in the abdomen too. Rather than think of myself as a moron right now, I think I'm gonna' say dedicated and a little overly excited.
So, now it's after midnight, and I was reading some of the responses I got from yesterday's post and someone told me that Levaquin, my antibiotic for my urinary tract infection, can cause seizures!!
So I just got off the phone with my doctor (the wonderful, great one whose picture I'm in with in my February 25th post) and he said yes, a urinary tract infection can cause shaking but what I'm describing is not shaking (like a flubbery floundering), that it sounds just like a seizure! I coudn't reach him while I was in the hospital--just the nurses--you know how that goes--you can speak to a Dr. after hours because they're on call, but you can try all you want during the day, and your up the creek (and it's not chocolate).
So, anyway, my doc said it sounds like it was possibly a seizure caused by the drug and he would have admitted me and done more tests! I knew the ER doc was wrong, and I short of yelled at him, but to no avail.
No harm done though, I'm still alive and blogging, LOL...
He told me not to take another dose of the Levaquin tonight (it would be my 4th of five doses) and to come in the morning to get checked out. He won't be there, but another doc that I've known for years that is excellent will see me.
Here's some good info on Levaquin-- http://www.rxlist.com/cgi/generic/levoflox_wcp.htm#P
Thank you so much to my Aunt Diane and to my OH family for coming to the rescue again and figuring out my problems!! Also, thanks for all the nice messages, they really make me feel better!!
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April 21, 2008 on April 21, 2008 7:30 pm
A scary day today. I went (by ambulance) back to the ER because I got up from my bed and was dizzy walking to the bathroom and when I got to the bathroom I got even dizzier and then I got sort of slammed back against the wall as if someone pushed me and my whole body started shaking sort of like a seizure (I've never had one of those before). Anyhoo, when I got to the ER, they took all my vitals and my blood and said I looked perfectly normal and could go home (after four hours in a freezing hallway). So I went home and I'm going to work tomorrow, but I'm also going back to the Dr. (my pcp) for a follow up, then Wednesday to my plastic surgeon, then Friday to the surgeon who did my obstructed bowel surgery (who is also my RNY surgeon). I'm taking the antibiotic Levaquin and Benadryl.
AND, I'm down another two pounds, and now weigh 125. I was steadily losing two pounds a month, but now I've lost 5 pounds in 20 days. My husband said not to worry about this until I get everything else under control (tummy tuck incisions, obstructed bowel incisions, contact dermatitis from the tape AND last but not least, my urinary tract infection).
My BMI is 20.8, and is normal down to 18.5, which for me would be 110 pounds, so I'm fifteen pounds away from very scary territory. But fifteen pounds is a lot. But it's not a lot if you just lost five pounds in the past 20 days!!!!! Okay, now you see how my brain is thinking so fast!!
I've been trying to eat something every hour!! Yikes! I used to gain weight just watching someone else eat, now I'm trying to fatten myself up--whowoulda' thunk it?? Neither one is good.
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