They have been running test after test for the last 16-18 months and finally ended up at Rush Medical University in Chicago where they gave me a positive diagnosis of CMT (Charcot-Marie Tooth Disease).

I have so many issues now and all I can think is how lucky I am to weigh 165 instead of 570.

So December started out so-so 'stress-wise' but it went downhill and hasn't really started climbing back up.
I think I have the reason pretty well pinpointed but that doesn't mean I can easily alleviate the stress but I am working on getting it under control.

I really missed reading all of my friend's updates on the two networking sites I utilize, Oh and Facebook.  I feel like I haven't been making much progression lately.  Not with necessarily in terms of weight management but with life in general.  I can feel myself slipping downward and it is starting to concern me.  I just feel like I have no drive or ambition to do anything.  How do we force ourselves to get 'driven' again?  Again, I am not simply talking about weight management but life in general.

Hopefully I use this post and the few minutes I am about to spend on the forums and checking on my OH friends to rejuvenate and keep the momentum going strong.  If I can do that I will post more later.  Until then, I bid you ado.

-Jaime

This is a super long post describing what happened to me (got a ticket or two) the first week of November and I went to court for supervision today.  i would say don't read it it is too long and I just wanted to put it down on 'paper', so to speak.  (That sounds odd when talking about putting your thoughts on the computer.  You know, 'put it on paper'... more like 'put it on computer' or 'put it on data'  heh)  I would skip reading this post unless you want to read all about my big adventure of getting two tickets (one of them while driving 98 mph) and going to court and hearing the judge say nice things about me and hearing the judge basically put the assistant states attorney in his place.  If you want to spend 10-15 minutes reading random babble about such an adventure then be my guest and read on.  Like I said I just wanted it for my journal, I copy and save all my blogs on my hard disc and print them out and put them in my binder by date so I can read them one day.

Now for "Jaime's Big Adventure"

I had to go to court this morning.  Well, I guess I did not have to go but I wanted to get court supervision for a speeding ticket.  In late October I went to visit my sister and her family in Traverse City, Michigan.  On the way home, November 4th, I got pulled over 15 minutes from home.  I drove 6.5 hours and got pulled over the last 15 minutes...  I was driving very, very fast though.  The last couple times I went up to visit I drove my 1988 Pontiac Firebird Formula.  Let's face it, Firebird's are not designed for a comfortable, relaxing cruise across a few states.  A Firebird, especially the older models, feel every bump and pebble in the road.  They sit very low and have terrible traction in winter weather, heck in plain old wet weather they don't have much traction.

We decided I should take the wife's 2004 Bonneville for several reasons.  One the Firebird had been 'acting up' and I hadn't figured out what was wrong but what things and parts I did replace hadn't helped it idle and run well.   The other reason was that Traverse City, Michigan is as far north as you can get on the east side of the state and a large amount of lake effect snow is not unheard of in early November.  My wife and I figured it was better to have a front wheel drive, traction control vehicle rather than a Firebird with rear wheel drive, tires designed for speed and agility not wet or snowy weather, plus it has a ton of power all going to the rear wheels so it easily skids out of control if you aren't careful.  I have driven it in the snow and I don't even have to put my foot on the gas, if I give it the slightest bit of gas to accelerate it fish-tails.

So, to get back on topic, the cluster stopped working on the Bonneville and I had no idea how fast I was going.  the only thing that did work was the odometer.  I was sitting at a stop sign in Traverse City and it read 140 MPH and no rpms, but the car was running.  When I first started the car it said the RPM's were maxed out, red lined, the speedometer said like 30-40mph, the battery read no charge at all, the oil gauge was maxed out and the temperature gauge was maxed out.  The weather was 40 degrees and I had just started the car, no way the temperature was maxed.  So I check fuses and all the fluid levels and everything was good.  But I had to head home so I left and figured I would hang with the flow of traffic.

Well, the speed limit in Michigan is 75, Illinois is 65.  I stopped for Gas in Michigan and since it is only 530-550 miles from my sisters house to my house in Macomb, IL I didn't need gas again because a full tank will get 425-450 miles on the Bonneville.  I set the cruise and adjusted as I drove, but I never did crank it down any.  I flew across Illinois on I-80 in very good time but was using the cell phone (I wear a headset and I look like a telephone operator but it is safe and it doesn't echo like bluetooth)  so that helped pass some time.  I also take my iPod and put tunes on, got a good after-market MP3 player with an amp and subwoofer in the trunk. (I hate all the mids and highs and no lows, I do not normally crank the sub, it is just to help balance things out.)

So I got to the west side of Illinois and was making record time, I figured I was doing 85 or so.  The trip usually takes 8 hours of driving and I was on track for 6.5 hours.  That is actual driving time but I only stop one time, I eat very little but do drink a lot.  I use the bathroom once when I get gas and that is it.  I always skip breakfast and eat a late lunch, lets face it I got the DS and I never know when something isn't going to sit right.  Hard to find a restroom on the interstate sometimes, specially when you have to go badly, Murphy's Law!

anyway, 15 minutes form home I get the red/blue lights.  I pull over asap, way off the road (I don't want the officer getting hit)  I turn on the interior lights, put window down, shut off car, turn on hazard lights and place both hands on the top of the wheel.  I thought since it was dark and I brought back 600+ lbs of apples I picked so the back seat was stacked WAY up making it nearly impossible for him to see me easily I would make it easier on him to know I wasn't going to do anything to him.  Safety first right?

So he said, "You know why I pulled you over but can you tell me why you are in such a hurry and where you are headed?"  I said sure I left Traverse City, Mi 7 hours ago, I was visiting my sister and her family and I am 15 minutes or so from home.  I stopped once in Michigan for gas and I haven't stopped since.  My entire cluster stopped working this morning when I got into the car but I couldn't stay up there for a week or so while they repaired it so I set the cruise once I was on the interstate and tried to adjust accordingly with the flow of traffic.

He said I was doing 98mph in a 65.  I was in disbelief but I didn't argue with him, I am sure he was correct.  He took my license and insurance card, which was only good until November 3rd and this was the 4th.  Came back 5-10 minutes later and said "start your car please."  So I did, and he said "rev it up for me", when I did the mph pegged at 140, the rpms dropped to zero and everything was nutty.  He then said, "Well, you told me the truth, 4 out of 5 people use that as an excuse.  When I have them do what I just had you do 1 out of 100 actually has an issue."  He told me he would write it for 94 in a 65 instead of 98 so I didn't have to go to court unless I wanted to get supervision or something.  Well, it was also the difference between a $95 fine and hundreds of dollars for reckless driving, driving too fast for conditions (night time), speeding 30+ and something else.  (I asked a friend of mine that works in a neighboring county as an assistant states attorney.  She said that fast is possible county jail time, not over a year so no prison but still, jail time.)  So the cop was really cool doing that for me.

That was Thursday or Friday at like 7:30pm, completely dark out by then.  Sunday I was in the van and looked down and realized I was doing 74 or so, about that time here comes a state cop... POOP!  Another ticket.  At least the second one is only $75.  Now all that and I have to take 20 shots at $35 a shot.  We do not have the money for it so we couldn't pay the electric bill, the cell phone bill and the cable TV/cable Internet bill.  So we are already $600-$800 behind and no way to catch up until I get back to school in January and take out a little extra on my student loan.  Now we have a $75 and $95 ticket.

I called my insurance guy (also a very close friend) and asked him if getting a ticket would mess with my insurance.  he assured me it would not unless we got canceled or changed companies/underwriters.  So I paid the $75 ticket last week and went to court for supervision for the $95 ticket, I figured keep the 94mph off the license.

the judge called my name and I am still bent over some and today I am really bloated so I look terrible cause I hurt.  I drove myself so no pain pill(s).  I told the judge I plead guilty and I would like supervision if possible.  The assistant states attorney said "No, we want a conviction your honor."  The judge repeated what the attorney just said "...conviction..."  My reply was, "Judge this is the first time I have gotten pulled over in a long time, let alone a ticket."  The judge asked me how long and I told him 8 or 9 years.  He asked the assistant states attorney if he showed any convictions or anything in the last 8-9 years.  the attorney said "No your honor, nothing but we..." and the judge interrupted the attorney and said Supervision if fine with me then, he hasn't been pulled over in that long then he can have 6 months supervision."  the attorney looked really angry but all he could say is "Yes judge."  The judge told me it would be $200 for the fine, court costs and to stay out of trouble for the next 6 months, until June 15th, 2010.  I said, "Yes judge I will do my best and thank you for your mercy Judge."

The judge laid his papers down, took off his glasses and looked right at me and said, "Well you have been the single only person so far today that didn't have an excuse for why you were speeding, not wearing a seat belt, no insurance, leaving the scene of an accident or not having a child in a safety seat."  The judge continued, 'When I asked you how you wanted to plead you said, 'guilty'.  I said why were you operating a vehicle so fast?" 

The judge then said, "Your reply was, 'Yes judge I was speeding and I have no excuse just a reason."  The judge went on to say, " You told me the reason is the cluster in the car broke the morning you left Michigan and you headed for home anyway.  You also stated that You could have made sure you weren't speeding by setting your cruise a bit slower than traffic rather than keeping it set at a Michigan speed where you set it t the fast lane speeds."

I told the judge just like I told the officer that wrote the ticket, 'I know I deserve the ticket, I broke the law.' I told the judge that I was just asking for supervision, not arguing the cost or the fact that the cluster was broken so I shouldn't have to pay anything.

The judge commented that it was refreshing to not hear an excuse as to why someone didn't deserve a ticket or fines or jail.  And part of the reason he granted my supervision was due to my honesty, the other part was due to the fact that I hadn't been pulled over in 8-9 years, let alone gotten a ticket of any kind.

So I have until Feb. 22nd to come up with $200.  I have no idea if I can borrow enough from a student loan but I sure hope so because I need to borrow $800, plus whatever late fees and stuff will be tacked onto the past due bills.  I am also having to go through a whole thing with Financial Aid because I took this semester off so I could have my panniculectomy.  I knew I couldn't have the panniculectomy in late November and still get to class the last 3 weeks, which are when all the big projects are due and finals.  So I hope I can get the Federal and State grants and not have to max out a student loan(s) to pay for school.

Okay, so I just wanted to post this so that when I go back and read my journal some day I will have this to remember... Not that I want to remember two tickets and all these money issues but hey, it happened and I want it in my journal.

WHEW!!! I think I got some sort of calorie burning done utilizing me fingers today, lol.

-Jaime

I think I broke the digital scale my wife got me for Valentine's Day earlier this year.

Surely not due to my size, maybe it was because it was a cheap model.  I did like the scale though, the digital readout was nice to have.  But I got that one because I did weigh 570 lbs and had to weigh at the hospital on the special wheelchair scales.  This scale weighed up to 400 lbs, which I hit shortly after Valentine's day this year.

Anyway, it died yesterday.  I tried new batteries and all the display does is blink or flash repeatedly.

Oh well, I am going to hold off a bit and get another scale for Christmas, maybe... if I can hold off that long.

-Jaime