kellybell

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Ok, so things have been getting much much better. I still have this pretty sharp nagging pain on my left side, above and to the left (my left) of my belly button. It's really the only place I'm having pain besides when I bend over (then the incision by my belly button hurts)

It doesn't help that I am sick with a cold, and every time I cough, the left side starts hurting worse. The only thing that helps is to keep pressure on it (from my hand) and I can't do that all day.

Last night when my brothers girlfriend was helping me give Nathan a bath (the only thing thats still REALLY hard for me) she handed him to me to wrap in a towel, and I almost dropped him from the pain I felt when I lifted him. I basically threw him at her and ran out of the room because I was about to cry. I don't know why that one area would be hurting so bad. I did too much yesterday also, and today too, and I'm really paying the price for it right now. As soon as my son goes to sleep, I'm going to take some pain med.

Other than that, I'm doing really well with the diet. Today I had a carnation instant breakfast with soy milk for breakfast (14 g prt)  and aprox 3 oz of mixed berry lowfat yogurt (3 g protein) for lunch, and I'm about to get something for dinner, but I don't know what yet. Those CIB are pretty good, and I'm tempted to have another one of those, but that would put me nowhere NEAR the protein requirement for the day.

Yesterday, I went out to dinner with my family. I brought a slimfast incase there was nothing else I could get, but they had tomato basil soup. Let me tell you, it was WONDERFUL. But I made a bad mistake. i drank too soon after eating, and booooy, it was hurting soooo bad. It was the first time I felt that really bad-over full- stuffed feeling since I got the band. It was very uncomfortable, and I almost thought I was gonna get sick, but I did my deep breathing, and got over that feeling. But my tummy hurt soo bad. 

I decided to walk around meijer for a while (i needed milk for the baby) and move around until I felt better. It took about 2 hrs, but it finally went away, and I spent $175.00!!!!!!! YIKES! I thought I would SAVE money on food when I had this done, but I spent about triple what I would normally spend. Yikes. I HAVE to take some stuff back. I bought shoes for the baby and a few other non-essential items, but most of it was shampoo, toilet paper, laundry detergent, replacments for the glade plug-in thingys, and food for the baby. Not exactally returnable stuff. Well, anyway, it over and done with, so there's no sense to worry about it now.

ttyl!

Ok, yesterday was a horrible day. It was the first day that I had no help from anyone all day with my son. So, I didn't take any pain meds because I knew they would knock me out, and I would be no good to take care of him. 

I got pretty sick, and didn't hardly eat anything all day because I felt so sick. I did drink a high protein slimfast shake late at night, hoping that would help with my energy level. It's a vicious cycle for me. I feel sick, so I don't eat, and then I get so tired from having no nurtrition that I am to tired to even get up and eat. So finally i FORCED myself to eat some tomato soup with a little protein powder, and then later, the hp shake. I feel way better today,

I had some yogurt today, and a homemade protein/crystal lite popsicle. I feel much much better.

I'm not believing my scale when it tells me I have lost 23 lbs. I think it must be broken. I don't feel like I've lost more than a few lbs, and I didn't measure myself, so i don't know if i have lost any inches. I'm excited for my dr appt on friday so I can get an accurate weight.

Ok, I'm gonna take my son up to my grandma's house and hang out there today. Still in pain, although it's alot less.

Ok, i just gotta say, I LOVE MY BAND! I'm sooo happy that I made this choice. I'm still in a LOT of pain, (only 4 days out) but it's getting EXPONENTIALLY better every day. The pain meds help a lot too. :-) I think I'm taking 4 weeks off work. I'll never have this chance to heal and to re-train myself, so I might as well take advantage of it.

The difference I feel is AMAZING. I feel virutally no hunger. I know that this will pass, but for now, it's wonderful. I can really feel the difference between "head hunger" and "belly hunger." It's actually been harder than I thought I would be. I cried on the way home from the grocery store the other day. I wasn't HUNGRY, but I wanted food.

I ordered a new protein powder from Unjury, and I got it today. It was $38 for 30 scoops! YIKES! Soo expensive, but when you consider that it's unflavored and you can add it to ANYTHING, it's worth it, i guess.  I am so tired of chocolate. I never want to eat chocolate again.

Today I ate the following:

3 oz of soy yogurt (4 g protein)

4 oz strawberry yogurt mixed w/ 1 scoop propowder (24 g pro)

5 oz runny mashed potatoes w/ 1 scoop propowder (22 g pro)

2 oz chocolate ice cream (major cheating here!! I don't even know why I did it, but it's over and I'm not going to beat myself up about it)

3 oz  strawberry slimfast high protein (5 g pro)

I've notice that late at night is the worst time for my cravings. After nathan's gone to bed and I'm just sitting up. This is when I would normally eat something, anything I wanted. Now, I'll just pace back and forth in the kitchen, since this is no longer an option for me.  I actually stuck my finger in a jar of queso for a taste, because I miss it so much! Then I decided that is was borderline nutty, and put it away. 

i weighted myself, and I've lost 11 pounds! I'm soo happy! But I know I'll regain a little bit of that when I start back on solids, so I'm not getting myself too worked up.

I'm pretty happy right now. Things are really starting to fall into place in my life. Luke is coming around a lot more. Nathan is starting to like him, and I can tell Luke loves Nathan- or at least, he's starting to. Nathan cried for him when he left today, and I thought it was really sweet, even though he never cries for me! But that's because he loves his aunt molly sooo much, and that makes me really happy.

Anyway, I'm starting to feel better, and I think I'm going to make a trip out to toyrus tommorow to return a b-day present for nathan.

Night!

Sooo, day 2 post op.  Still a lot of pain. Just one specific spot to the upper left side of my belly button. Not sure why, but it hurts pretty bad.

Anyway....What I ate today:

Breakfast: 4 oz skim milk with 1 1/2 scoops of chocolate protein powder

snack: 2 oz of s.f. cherry jello

lunch: 4 oz skim milk, 1 scoop protein powder, 1 tablespoon of peanut butter! A chocolate peanutbutter shake! It wasn't too bad.

snack : about 5 oz of the rest of the choc/pb shake sipped slowly over an hour and a half

Dinner: 2 oz baby food turkey and gravy  3 oz  beef broth

snack: 3 oz strained cream of chicken soup.

Damn, that seems like a lot of food now that I write it all down. I think I'm eating too much. I shouldn't be eating more than 4 oz at a time, but it doesn't seem to be a problem going down. But I've been up since 5 am, so normally I wouldn't be eating that soon in the day, making me actually add an extra meal to the day.

I think my scale has broken, as it says I have lost 60 lbs. lol. I know weight loss surgery is GREAT, but I don't think I've lost 60 lbs in 2 days. I think I would notice that. Sooo, I'm going to have to treat myself to a new scale.

Well, just took some meds, and i'm about to pass out. My sister kept the baby for me tonight, since he is sick, and kept me up most of the night last night. It was pretty rough. But his dad spent the whole day here with us today, to help me out, and it was really really nice.

Ok, gotta sleep

I made it! Dr Tom said I did great! I'm really excited, even though I am still in quite a bit of pain.

I have a lot of gas pains. I took some gas x, so hopefully that will help me soon.

I only had about 8 oz of "food" at the hospital, not including ice chips and water. I had 2 oz of broth in about 25 mins, and I felt like I had eaten thanksgiving dinner! I was soooo full. Lots of pressure. I thought I was gonna get sick, but I did some deep breathing (always helped with morning sickness) and made it through.

So, I will write about my experience.

The surgery was great. I didn't have any weird dreams or bad feelings like I did with my c-section. I did really good about not freaking out before the surgery. I'm pretty proud of myself.

The pain came and went in waves. It was pretty bad for a few minutes when I first cam out of surgery, but they gave me meds, and it was almost instantly gone.

The rest is pretty uneventful. I felt awsome after my first pain shot, and I got out of bed right away, and went to the bathroom and sat in a chair for a while. The I got back in bed, and my pain came back with a fierceness! It was pretty bad. I didn't like the fact that you don't get pain meds administered at regular intervals. You have to ask for them, and if you wait until the pain comes back, it can get pretty bad before they actually get the meds to you.

This morning after the shift change, I had quite a problem with my nurse. Her name was LeAnn, and she was very nasty. A few silly things, like I asked her at 9:40 to bring my meds in at 10:00 and help me to the bathroom and to change and brush my teeth, and she never came. I finally called her at 10:30. Also, I asked her to heat up my soup 4 times, and she never did, so I asked a nurse I saw in the hallway. 

The thing that really  made me mad was when I was getting ready to leave. I asked to change my pain med perscription, so that was taking a while. She had already taken out my IV, but didn't actually discharge me. While I was waiting to get the new script, I started having a LOT of pain (around noon) I buzzed for a nurse, and they said she would be right in. Well, she didn't come in (if she doesnt come, the buzzer stays on, and re-notifies them about every 5 mins.) After 25 mintues, she still didn't come into my room, and this time I was in severe pain. My friend sherry was picking me up, so she went out in the hall and just got a nurse who was walking by. She was so sweet, and she went to ask LeAnn if she would help with her paitent (me) and LeAnn said "No."  So my friend sherry finally said something to her, and she finally came in the room and told me that I was discharged and I could leave. (i still hadn't received my scrip, or any discharge instructions.) I told her I was in severe pain (I was crying by now) and LeAnn told me that I had two choices- I could either go home now (still without a scrip or any instructions,) or I could wait to get some meds from the pharmacy. I asked her how long it would take, and she said (i'm not joking here) "I can't see the future."

I was so pissed at this point, that I started raising my voice (NOT YELLING, just being more firm) I told her I was in SEVERE pain, and I would NOT even be able to make it to the car in this condition. She told me that I was just upset, and I needed to calm down and take some deep breaths. I told her I was doing that already, and I was NOT upset, I was just in a LOT of pain.

Finally the charge nurse came in, and gave me my meds- cut them up for me and got me water to take the pills and everything. I told her how rude LeAnn had been. I told her how she'd been basically ignoring me, and that she might be having a bad day, and I understand that, but I shouldn't be suffering because she was having a bad day. She was very understanding, and told me that LeAnn WAS having a bad day, but that was NOT an excuse to make me suffer, and that she would say something to her later.

If it weren't for that situation, I would have said that this was a GREAT experience. She ruined a lot of it for me, and when I think back about this surgery, I will remember THIS as a very important part of this experience, and even though it had nothing to do with the band, or Dr Tom, it really made this experience difficult for me.

BUT, that's all over now. I'm home, and resting, and I have betadine and brusies all over my body! LOL. 

I'll post some pics as soon as I feel up to it. 

Coughing and hiccupping hurts pretty bad, and so does the gas pain. Hopefully tommorow will be a better day.

I've eaten chicken broth, veggie broth, and beef broth, along with some jello, and lots of water. I'm about to make a protein shake, even though it's pretty late, I only had about 20 of the recommended 55 grams of protein for today. 

I'm a loser now!  Well on my way!

The birthday party went off without a hitch! It was wonderful, and I truly could not have asked for a better day! I'm so happy, and very content about the next year.

I'm totally prepared. I have about 40 low carb shakes, two big jars (for lack of a better word) of protein powder. TONS of chicken, beef and veggie broth for my liquid phase.

I'm getting really excited!

I bought a pint of strawberry cheesecake ice cream as my final treat, and I only ate about 5 spoonfuls of it before I decided that I didn't want anymore, and that was IT! It's the first step in the right direction.

Of course I'm nervous, but I'm super excited.

I still have to pack, and its after midnight! So, I'll meet you all on the loser's bench tommorow!

Just think, in about 12 hrs from now, I'll be in surgery! WOW!

OK!

So, I went in today for my pre-op, history and physical. 

Paid the remainder of my program fee ($300) and my co-pay ($30) and found out the remaining balance that will be due after the insurance pays their portion. Drum roll please...........

It's $789.30!!!!!!!!!!!! YIPPEEEEEE!  I am so so so happy! Well, actually, I wish it was nothing, but I was figuring it out to be about $3,200 with my deductible and 20% co-pay! I'm so happy that I actually made my first payment of $89.30.  Also, St. Luke had a discount if you agree to have payments automatically withdrawn. You get a 10% discount, so I will save $70 off the total, and pay $70 per month for 9 months.


Besides them taking seven, REPEAT SEVEN, tubes of blood from me (which was no big deal at all-- it didn't even hurt) it was smooth sailing, and there were no other medical tests.

I DO think they were trying to test my mental status though. Every person I was was asking me about any medical conditions that I had. My answer to every single one was NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. The last time I said "no" this much was... well, yesterday, to my son! LOL

All in all, it wasn't bad at ALL! :-)

More later about the convo i had with dr tom.

gotta get the baby up from his nap!

Do you ever have days when you are soo sad that it overwhelms you. It fills you up and you feel like it will never go away. Like you will never be happy again?

http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

amazing