Lose 80-100, depending how I look and feel :)

I broke into the 150's!!!!! YAY!!!! 159.5!!!!! :) Okay, that's all.

I have had a few people email me and ask, so I thought I would do a post and let those of you who care know how I am doing.  Well, I am down 82 Pounds :) I am right at 160.  It's really insane.  I will try and post a few of my pics from my Maui trip earlier this month.  I have a picture of me in a wet suit and the funny thing is that I actually think it looks pretty good.  I have had a busy summer, doing lots of physical activities and running around being social again.  REALLY SOCIAL.  I have been dating quite a bit too.  Funny how 80 pounds makes ex's come crawling back. lol.  It has really been a whirlwind of emotions, good and bad.  I am having a hard time shaking my "fat girl" mentality and even a harder time accepting new attention in the proper way.  The new me is very defensive about the old me.  I ask myself weird questions like....."would he have liked me 40 pounds ago? 80 pounds ago?"  I think it is pretty distructive and it is something I am learning to deal with.  Even with that said, I honestly have never felt better.  I am living a physically and emotionally healthier exsistance.   For the first time I am ready to address my issues, determine my problems (even if they are small compared to many) and work on making myself a better person.   It really feels good. 

I hit the 70 Mark and am feeling pretty darn great.  I have noticed that it just isn't comming off any more like it once was.  I am losing a pound every week  to week and a half now and if I am wanting to drop this last 20 to 30 pounds I am going to have to up the effort level quite a bit.  My next short term goal is to make it into the 160's.....only 2 pounds away.  Now that I am smaller, some odd things are occuring....1) Men who I have hung out with for years,  all of sudden want their chance.....hahaha.  2) My sister and I keep getting asked if we are twins...again hahaha 3) I don't hate getting dressed in the morning and I don't rush home to put on comfy clothes (although, they are still my favorite to wear) 4) I invite people over to swim...just weird 5) I go shopping in regular stores for clothes and designer jeans FIT.   Just on a whim, I grabbed my sister's Juicy Jeans to see how far I was from being able to wear their stuff and to my shock they slipped right on.  No tugging, no sucking in, they just FIT.  My old self would be calling me a skinny bitch right now, and that thrills me.    

I knew it was going to happen eventually, I knew that someone get ballsy and call me out on this whole thing, however, it happened in a very unexpected way.  A guy who I barely knew, but who is very cute, asked me to dinner and so I went.  We went to a Spanish Tapas place, which I was thrilled about because I knew I could get a nice small appetizer and call it a done deal.   Well about 3 mins into the meal (okay, maybe more like 10) I am getting that stuffed feeling and I have only had about 1/4 of my plate (which was teeny tiny to begin with) and he commented on the fact that I had stopped eating, not in a rude way, but to make sure I liked what I had ordered.  I assured him that everything was great and then it happened...
half joking he said, "What did you have Lap-Band or something?"  Being the total awkward dork that I am, I froze right there.  Made some god-awful face I am sure, and then fumbled out, "not exactly, gastric bypass."  He was totally cool about it and actually kinda made me feel dumb for thinking it was a big deal.   He apologized for putting me on the spot and in a lot of ways it made me feel a million times better.  I am sure this won't be the last time I have to face a situation of this nature, but I am glad that my first experience having to tell a stranger was a positive one.  It was also interesting that he mentioned that it is something that his sister has considered doing because I think that education when it comes to these surgeries is becoming more common.  His positive reaction was a result of understanding that I wasn't just wussing out or was too lazy to exercise.   Hopefully, future dates will be equally understanding and if not then I guess we are just going to have to start a singles chat room on here. lol. I know first hand that there are some VERY good looking guys on here who are great catches!