Clarissa A.

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So for some odd reason I still see FAT Clarissa.
I have been working out and when I come back from my work-out, I look in the mirror and I look fatter than ever!!!!

I was afraid no TERRIFIED of weighing myself today. I have a feeling the scale is going to say an astronomical number and I am going to fall into a severe depression.

 I feel like I am going insane

So I just came back from changing and I realized - Hey, I dont lose my breathe when changing my shoes anymore. And guess what?!?!? My sneakers are tied in the middle and not on the side anymore!!!!!! I feel really good.
Ok, now I am going to take my daily walk -  wish me luck with this heat/humidity

I just walked past one of the women that works on the other side of the building and she said "hey, slim. How's it going?"
Now, I know I am not slim but I am getting there
So I posted a pic of myself today, NOT wearing all dark clothes for once.

I was just looking at my BMI
Pre Surgery 47.7
Today 35.5
NOT bad for 18 weeks

Soooo I got on the scale today and was fully expecting to see 212 which is where I have been stuck for weeks. So reluctantly I look down and see 207!!!!
My lowest weight in High School was 196, so I am 9 lbs away from my Teenage weight. I am so excited!!!
I mean 207 is still a big number but I am content today and only 27 lbs away from goal.
Nothing wrong with that!!!

I am 4 months out today and I can hardly believe it. Time flies!!! 
I remember feeling awful at the beginning and chanting "this too shall pass" while having breakdowns/crying fits.
Today I feel good!!!! I am wearing  dress and looking forward to seeing my family for a Graduation party tonight. I am obsessed with food labels and so are my children, we are learning to eat healthy and everyday brings more energy.
Granted, I still have bad days and I have gone thru a couple of stalls but I am hanging in there and sticking to the rules. I am finally at a place where I can say no matter what I have been thru I LOVE MY RNY!!!!!
My only regret = I should have had it sooner

I take pictures and I see the difference but when I look in the mirror I see no change. My mind is playing tricks on me.
My aunt, whom I hadn't seen since 1 week after my surgery, came over for dinner on Saturday. I had to run out to the store to get more cheese so she was already at my house when I got back. I walked in the door and she didn't recognize me.
It is so surreal to me because I look in the mirror and see same ole me
Does this happen to you???