I told my son yesterday that I almost feel human again.  Almost, not quite.  But I'll take it.  I went to my surgeon's office today to have my jackson-pratt tube removed and got my first post-surgical weigh in.  Maggie ushers me over the scale saying, "I'd like you to meet your friend!  You are going to start to LOVE getting weighed!"  Well, not quite yet; I wouldn't say I love it yet but I am down 11 pounds    since my pre-surgery weigh in.  I hoped for a little more but Maggie says I am still very bloated from the 24-hour fluid IVs I got in the hospital.  That makes 45 pounds total (34 in the pre-surgery diet, plus the 11 last week),  I must say, I am proud of myself. 

What's most exciting is that I'm finally out of pain!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I've had a baby; I've had migranes all my life and I've had four previous surgeries.  But I can honestly say that the pain I had post-WLS was the worst I've ever experienced.  Do not be put off by my comment -- don't ever let that stop you from doing what you need to do - but just a little bit of reality for ya!

I drove to the doc's office today, (no problem since I hadn't taken any painkillers in more than 24 hours) and a little later treated myself to a little shopping spluge at CVS for bandages and stuff.  I actually love shopping at those big drug stores!  Better than the mall to me-- call my crazy, I don't know. 

I guess I've adapted to the liquid diet.  Still on full liquids for another couple of days.  I haven't eaten solid food in 13 days!  I can't say I have been hungry at all - that's really strange and wonderful and amazing!!! But I haven't.  I do look forward to my first pureed food this weekend, though -- I can't wait to scramble an egg and puree it.  Eggs are my all time favorite food, (luckily, my cholesteral is always ok). 

Getting my protein in, thanks to these miraculous 3 oz protein "bullets" by nu-Whey.  They come in a bunch of flavors and have 42 grams per bullet.  I mix one in a big glass of water and sip it for hours until it's gone.  Tastes like very weak juice.  I like it! 

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Ok - surgery is done. That's a little surreal, actually. I really did do this.  Recovery is a bitch. And while they tell you that, maybe you don't hear them. At least I didn't.  Yes, I heard there would be pain. Of course, there's pain. It's major abdominal surgery. I guess I didn't really "hear" it, my mind clogged as it was with thoughts of rapid weight loss.  But pain there is.  Lots and lots of it for me. I know everyone is different, but I'm a quick healer, typically, and so I didn't expect all of this. 

Surgery Day --  I got to the hospital, Abington Memorial, at abut 6:20. All by my lonesome.  I knew anyone I brought at the front end would wind up waiting and waiting for hours. They took me back right at 6:30 and I got into the infamous gown open in the back, (too small, of course).  No nerves whatsoever.  Dr. Bonanni strolled by about 6:45, looking chipper and ready for action. Great guy.  He asked me a bunch of questions, then said he'd see me in surgery.   Next, Dr. B's lead medical assistant, Manny, came by.  Same drill; different questions.  Finally, the Abington nurse came by and began the very thorough questioning for the surgery.  All done at about 7:30, including a visit from at least two anesthesiology team members.  Then, they sped me back to the OR, where two very kind nurses were waiting.  They took my contacts, (drat - I'm as blilnd as a bat, so I hated that), had me slide onto the OR table and then poof, the next thing I remember is waking up in the anesthesia step-down unit.  I felt ok. Not a lot of pain at that point.  Still under most of the anesthesia. 

Dr. Bonanni appeared bedside, as cheerful as ever,  but told me what a difficult surgery it had been.  He said that my liver and spleen were both horribly oversized, and despite the week on liquids, they had a massive issue to deal with.  They had to hold the big organs up the whole time, causing them to swell.  Still, they had managed to complete the procedure laproscopically and I was very grateful for that. 

My mom came by, despite my asking her to just chill at home, and I was glad to see her.  No matter how much of a trooper I think I am, I still need my Mommy, (lol).  Later, in my room, (beautiful by the way - what a lovely hospital Abington is), i got the mad rush treatment by a team of very competent professionals.  Had the foley catheter in, (no biggie), but had to advise the team that they needed to help me take care of my period, too.  Timing is everything, I guess.  Got a couple of shots -- one for heparin, anti blood-clot, which Dr. B is very obsessive about, and another for pain.  The pain medicine was fantastic, and I drifted off into a nice, drug-induced sleep for hours.  

Then, it wore off.  I asked for more and got it, about every four hours.  My lips and mouth were so dry that I could actually peel the dead skin off the top.  I had no saliva in my mouth and was advised that I should not try to swallow even a sip of water.  I asked for swabs and was vigilent about not swallowing any of the water that winds up in your mouth when you use them.  

Fast forward two days.  I kept water down, then broth, then Jello with no problems, walked around the floor a few times each day, bathed myself, etc. and so Dr. B. said I could go home if I wanted.  I wanted.   Manny and Maggie, Dr. B's physician's assistant, had also come by during my stay.  I swear,  the three of them were so on top of things that I halfway expected one of them to show up at my door once I got home with a picnic lunch of Actigall and chicken broth. 

So, I'm home now.  As luck would have it, (or that darned timing again), my soon-to-be ex husband is moving out this weekend.  I've wanted that to happen so much for so long that it's odd it should happen on probably the one weekend I could have done without it, but there it is. He's been nice enough. Enduring dirty looks from my mother when she stops by.  But whatever, that will be done with, too and I really will be starting on a fresh slate in more than one area. I'm sure the Lord knows what He's doing. 

Well, the pain is kicking in again.  Took a sip of water about an hour ago and had a violent burst of naseau; first one.  Time to take more of that horrid Tylenol with codeine. Sucks.

I said that to myself so many times.  Before starting the next diet. Before trying the next exercise. But this time I'm saying it because tomorrow is my surgery day. 
It really has come. I would walk to that hospital on my knees if I had to; I'm so grateful. I'm praying but I don't even know what to ask the Lord for. I feel like he already knows everything I need. 

See you on the losing side.

Second day of liquids only, presurgery.  I'm hungry, have a headache that won't go away and feel lightheaded at times.  Either I'm doing something wrong or this is just really difficult.

Monitored protein intake carefully yesterday.  Got in 125 grams, mainly through powder and a protein bullet drink.  Ate tomato soup, which was probably a mistake, since looking at the label today I see that there were 12 grams of sugar in one serving. That's a little too much.  Think I'll stick to broth today. Had a little greek yogurt with a little Splenda a couple of hours ago.  A lot of coffee.  Hope today is better than yesterday.