Journal Started 8-22-06
Background.  37 years old, have 4 children, married for 19 years.  5’ 3” and 235 lbs. 
My lowest weight in past 3 years was 198, and that was with very strict low carb diet and curves workouts.  Seemed to work for my body type, but could not get below 190’s.  However, was first time in probably 8 years that I weighed below 200 lbs, and that did feel good.  But, once I started working again, after a 1 year hiatus, I found it hard to keep up the workout schedule and slacked off, gaining all my weight loss back, plus a few pounds….typical.  In fear of gaining more, as with other failed diets…start to seriously consider WLS again.  After researching and learning much about WLS, I discuss with my husband.  To my surprise, he was very supportive so long as insurance paid for it!!!  He was shocked that it was covered and that I qualified.  So the journey began.  At first I shared my journey with only his brother and wife, both think I am not that fat, but listen to my plight.  I then told my two sisters, who both think I am crazy, and although they are not negative directly to me, they are very quiet about it.  We have also shared this with my kids, who really don’t have an opinion one way or the other, but we do joke about what I will and won’t be able to eat, as I prepare them for changes.  I held off telling my mother-in-law for fear of ridicule, but with my sister-in-law by my side, I decide it is time to let her in on my secret.  She is very scared for me, and listens to my plight, but wishes I wouldn’t do it.  Now, the only person I need to tell is my mom, and I am having a hard time with that one. It just feels so awkward to bring up, but I need to get it done.  I think again, like most, she feels I am not that heavy.  I think a lot of my family members do not realize how being heavy affects a person.  This is not something that I have just recently been dealing with…it has been my whole life.  At age 11, I weighed 105…age 18, 165, age 26, 190, and here I am at age 37 and 235!  I do not want to wait until I have health issues or am so depressed that I don’t do anything about it.  So, I decided it was time to do something for me, this is my time.

I first started contemplating WLS in 2002, at my then highest weight of 232, I think.  I tried to avoid the scale, and I think I probably weighed more because when I look back at some of the  pictures, I was looking like a whale, or some sort of blob thing.  Anyhow, I put it off because I was embarrassed and uneducated on where to even begin. 

Then, again in 3-2006, I began contemplating WLS.  I think because once again, my diet had failed, I was back over 200 lbs, and feeling very depressed.  So, with that I started surfing the web for info and filled out something on one of the websites and then forgot about it.  I think at this point I still thought that it was a nice thought, but could never happen for me.  I figured I would not qualify for WLS, and if I was going to do this, it would be cash, which I knew we could not afford.  But, then someone called, and me still embarrassed and self conscious of this subject, was quiet surprised at the friendliness and patience this woman showed.  She went thru a list of questions, and said even though it did not appear that I had any co morbidities, that I was still 100 lbs over weight, and that with UHC I should qualify.  So with that I went to my first consult on 5-2006.  I was very nervous, and had went to the office of the woman who called, mostly because she was so helpful.  And, although the doctor seemed great and I am sure he is, I decided it was just too far to travel.  So, I pondered another month before doing some more research and finding an approved doctor closer to home.  I went for my next consult on 7-18-06.  The doctor pre-approved me and sent me on my way with papers in hand for my primary and cardiologist.  Again, that fear and embarrassment set in as I was so afraid to ask my primary for the surgery okay.  But, luck have it, when I called my primary, they squeezed me in for an appointment that same afternoon….very unusual as it is a very busy office.  So, I took it as fate, and ran with it.  My primary seemed shocked that I wanted such a life changing and drastic surgery.  But, with my clear statements that I was ready for this change, he ordered up all the required test.

Between 7-18 and 8-01, I completed all the ordered test (urine, blood, pelvic and abdominal utrasounds, chest xray, and EKG).  And on 8-01, I went to my first support meeting, which I found very enlightening, can’t wait till next one.  Also, on 7-25, my primary office called to inform me they found gall stones on the ultrasound, and wanted to discuss with me on my follow up appointment on 8-09.  So, I patiently NOT, waited for my appointment.  It seemed like an eternity.  I felt like, oh no, this was going to keep me from having surgery.  So, in mean time, I started researching gall bladder disease, and found that it is common and that can even be done at time of WLS. 

8-09, My primary doctor is pretty insistent on me having gall bladder surgery prior to WLS.  He is referring me to a general surgeon, with whom I cannot get an appointment until 8-22, bummer!!!  More waiting.

Test Results to WLS
*8-17, well since my WLS has not received any test results, I decided to pick up copies and fax myself.  His office confirmed that they have the copies I sent.

8-17, I also decide to pop into the general surgeon's office and see if I can get an earlier appointment, and first they tell me, no, but then say yes. So, here I go.  I had to only wait about 30”, which was not too bad.  He tells me he believes the gall bladder can be done at same time as WLS.  Yipee, I let WLS know this as well.

Open Case File with UHC
*8-21, Monday, WLS's office opened case with UHC.  Is now waiting for UHC to assign case manager and let her know what test results they need.  She also let me know that they are scheduling surgeries out to late OCOTBER or early NOVEMBER.  YUCK!!!  I was really hoping for a September surgery.  But, the time will pass quickly, just be patient…at least that is what I keep telling myself.

8-21, I called my primary's office to let them know what general surgeon said.  Later that afternoon, primary himself actually called back to inform me that he wants to discuss with general surgeon and still wants to do a surgery on 8-31 to check my ovaries and scar tissue pain, and have general surgeon remove gall bladder.  He will call me back to confirm.

8-22, I am sitting here thinking I may still need to get the okay from WLS to have the surgeries.  I do not want to do anything that will hinder or delay the WLS.  I am confused on why my primary is so insistent on doing the surgery.  I do have a slight abdominal pain, most likely scare tissue that comes and goes, but not often, at best once a month.  And, in past surgeries, I seem to always have small cyst show back up, and he cleans everything up. I am sure he just want to get it all clean prior to WLS, and figures why not have the gall bladder out at same time.  As for the gall bladder, I am not having any pain, but do get a nauseous feeling when I need to eat, but have not vomited.  I would prefer to wait and do at time of WLS, but I guess if I am going to be waiting 2 months for surgery anyhow, then oh well, why not have the other surgeries, and by the time I am recouped and healed, it will be time for WLS.  I think I will call WLS's office again to discuss.

What a DAY!!!   Verbal Approval!!!
*8-24, Thursday, AM, primary office calls to confirm that general surgeon has agreed to do the gall bladder removal on 8-31 with other surgery.  In the afternoon, I called WLS's to discuss the gall bladder surgery on 8-31, left her a message.  She called back and said that she would discuss with WLS.  And, she also informed me that she has a verbal approval from UHC. Oh my gosh, does that mean what I think it means.  I was trying to contain myself, and so was she!  She said that she will set a date with me after she gets the official approval in writing!!!  Yipee.   She said that they are scheduling surgery dates out for late October, early November, so with that said, she will call me when she gets written approval.  She also stated that she will probably be able to schedule surgery so while I am healing from gall bladder surgery, I am also waiting for WLS instead of two waits. Yeah, that sounds good to me!  So really no loss in time with having gall bladder removal, just extra time off from work, and of course, all this is subject to WLS approval.  Wow, actually only 3 days from open case file to the verbal approval!  Wow, oh did I say that already?

8-27, The waiting is torture.  Keep hoping that official letter will come in the mail.  If it isn’t here by Wednesday, 8-30, I am going to call UHC.  Surgeries are still scheduled for Thursday, and I suppose that will pass some time.  Just would like to get the WLS scheduled.  Next support group is 9-5, so I hope I am feeling up to attending.  I look forward to meeting Debbie again.  I met her last meeting but did not realize how often I would be talking with her during this process. 

8-30, Left WLS's office a message to check on approval letter and to let her know that I stopped by cardio's office and the girls at his office said they would get something to me next week for the surgery approval.
 I also did all my pre-op today for my laporoscopy and gall bladder removal tomorrow. 

8-31, Just waiting for surgery.  I have to be at hospital by 2:30 PM, for 4:00 surgery.  I went and got several different scar treatment stuff to try out.  I bought Mederma, and some nexcare scar kits as well as some bandaids.

Written Approval UHC
*9-2, Two days post op for the gall bladder removal and laproscopy. I am so sore.  Boy, if this is what to expect, I am going to be really sore.  Well, they also found a bleeding cyst during the surgery, perhaps the reason for my so called morning sickness.  I feel ok, can eat okay, but it is just very hard to get up from the bed, hurts my stomach.
Oh, the best news came 8-31 in mail, I got my written letter from UHC that my surgery is covered.  So, on Monday, I will call the WLS's office and confirm that they received and see if we can set a date yet.    It was really weird, the evening I came home from surgery the kids brought me the mail, I quickly scanned through it and totally missed the UHC letter (could be all the pain killers).  The next morning I am thumbing through the mail again, ready to shred any junk mail, and low and behold a letter from UHC....I ponder on how I could have missed this yesterday, as this is what I was looking for.  I was fearful to open but then tore it open, and YEAH, it is my written approval.  And, although, it reads very vague, and such, I know from reading other profiles that this is it....WOW, a total of 10 days from open case file, to written approval in hand, not too shabby.    But, since it is Sunday today, I have to wait until tomorrow to check with WLS office for date.  Hopefully in October, that would be so great. 

10-12-06...wow, I can't believe I have waited for a while to update.  I have a surgery date of 10-18, and I am very anxious.  There has been something to do each week up to the date, pre-op, dietition, labs, shopping.....can't beleive it will be next week.

On the 10th, I went to my pre-op with surgeon, and found out that he did not renew his contract with my surgeon...not good, I may have to pay up to $1500.  But, at least the hospital is still under contract.  I could choose to start all over with another surgeon, but decided it would be a small price to pay for health.

Will visit again next week after it is all said and done.

10-24-06

Consult 235, Pre-Op 220, day of surery 215, 5 days later 212

Ok, I am finally home and feel up to posting.  I had a 5 day hospital stay due to a slight feaver, possible phnemonia, spelling, I know I butured that....  :-(

Hospital stay was okay, but could not wait to get home to my own bed.  I was a model patient until the feaver....it shocked everyone. 

Now for the pain, I had a Lap RNY, and the pain was not nearly as bad as I expected, which was a good thing.  Only surprise was a drain tube, yuck.  I should get that out today at my post op appt.  I was off my morphin drip completely at 3 days out, and asked for no other pain meds.  I am not saying there was not pain, but it was very tolerable and was only while moving about, especially the in and out of bed.  Also, found that the drain tube often causes pain in my shoulder, doc said it is hitting a nerve, and as soon as he removes it it should be gone.  I hope so, cause it is the worst pain of all.  In fact, that is the first thing I asked him post op, was why my shoulder was in such pain. 

Liquids, finding it very hard to get my protein and water in.  Have purchased Unjury so I guess I will try to get that in with some crystal light today so I can get the protein count up.  First day, I consumed only about 45 grams of protein and 32 oz of water.

I'll keep you all posted.  Thanks so much for you well wishes and prayers.  So glad to be home and on the losing side.

10-25-06  Today is my hubby's b-day.  So I am making dinner for him and even bought a cake!  I don't have any temptation yet, but I know in a week or so it will be harder.

Yesterday, was my 1 wk post op, it went great.  they took the drain tube out, but now I have to contend with the waiting for the hole to close up, looks pretty yucky.  I was down 19 lbs from consult and 9 were from the pre-op appt.  I was surprised to hear that, because I really feel bloated.

My hubby and I were out all day today, felt pretty good.  Even drank a danon light and fit yogurt 6 grams sugar, 5 protein. I was worried I would dump, but it was fine.  I constantly have a water by my side so I can sip it often.  still only getting in about 32 oz a day. 

 11-29-06  Went to 6 wk postop appt yesterday.  I am down 25 lbs from day of surgery and 45 lbs from consult.  I have 50 lbs to go until goal.  The doctor is very pleased with my weightloss, and said losing an average of 10 lbs a month is right on.  So if I can just keep up the 2.5 lbs a week, I should be at goal by May.  i plan on posting some updated pictures soon.  Still have to take them.  I think I have lost everywhere but my tummy, I sometimes feel so bloated, especially after drinking protein, which is almost all the time!!!   I have had to take MoM a few times to get the bowel movements going, it works, but taste yucky!  Feel pretty good, and continue to go to Curves at least 3-4 times a week.  Will weigh and measure on Friday this week, and will share results.  My energy level, however, is really low when I am at work (nights), but the doc said not to worry that after 6 months or so it should pick up.   45/25 lbs gone forever!!!

3-15-07  I can hardly believe it has been 5 months since surgery.  I feel like the same person, but keep getting told I look so different.  I still get low on energy every now and then, but overall am so happy with results.  I have lots of lose skin, primarily abdomen, arms, inner thigh, and chest.  I will need some plastics to take care of all that later.  I can wear most size 12 pants easily and even some 8-10 misses and 9/10 juniors.  Shirts range from med/lrg depending on style, and jackets are 8 - 10.  I am weighing in at 155 and only 15 - 20 lbs to get to goal.  80 lbs gone forever!

 4-1-07  It's been a couple of weeks since last post, and although it seems like the weight loss is slowing, I am down to 147 in the mornings.  Getting closer to goal, but I don't seem to be losing in my tummy; perhaps it is the lose skin.  Anyhow, it is still nice to see the scale going down again, it seemed like it was stuck in the 150's forever.  85 lbs gone forever! 

 4-10-07  I am nervous because this afternoon will be my 6 month post op.  I think I have only lost 22 lbs in last 2 1/2 months, witch slowed a little from previous months, but still ok.  I am only about 10 - 15 lbs from goal...I keep changing what I want goal to be....originally was 145, but now looking to 130!  I am weighing in at 145 first thing in morning!  Yippee, finally getting out of the 150's!!!  I keep thinking more and more about a tummy tuck and breast lift, but fretting the cost and pain, as it sounds like it will be more painful than anything else I have experienced, but would complete my transformation.  Everyone is noticing the weightloss, makes me feel good, but yet akward at the same time.  90 lbs gone forever.

 5-18-07  Wow, it has been 7 months, sure doesn't feel like it now that I look back.   I am thrilled to be on the other side, and at my first goal.  The weight loss has slowed way down.  I think partly because I have been experimenting with no no foods more.  I will have to get that under control.  It would be a shame to come so far and inch the pounds back on for stupid food decisions.  I weigh in at 140 first thing in AM.  But looking to get to 130-135.  I have started to consult with plastic surgeons regarding tummy tuck and breast lift/augmentation.  Is going to be way to expensive, but will need done eventually to complete this transformation.  People at work and my family are starting to tell me I shouldn't lose any more weight, but do they see me without cloths, NO!!!!  So I will continue to seek my goal of 130-135 lbs.  10 pounds is not going to make me look sickly.  95 lbs gone forever!

6-1-07  Well holding steady in the 140 range.  Weighing 141.5 at curves and 138.5 first thing in AM.  Lost 4 lbs this past month, which is expected to come to a halt soon as I am approaching goal weight.  I keep getting more and more people that are telling me not to lose anymore weight.  I would still like to weigh btw 130-135, but if stay 140, would also be happy.  Have consulted with one PS so far, at an estimate of 13, 500K for TT, BL, and lipo on thighs, knee and flanks.  I really think I need a LBL, BL/BA, and Thigh lift, plus lipo and maybe an aux wedge for extra side bra lose skin fatty area, so am continueing my quest to seek out the perfect doctor!!! Hope my expectations are not to high.  I am hoping to have some PS by end of year or at beginning of year or as money allows.

7-17-07  Wow, at my 9 month post op I weighed in at 135.3!!!  So I am so close to 100 lbs gone forever, but just shy 2-3 pounds.  I am not worried if it stays right at 135,  feel great and love shopping.  I am scheduled for a TT/BL/BA on August 17th, will post updates and photos afterwards.  I can't wait to get rid of all the lose skin.  I picked a local doctor since it was too nerving to try to go out of states....I may look into inner thigh lift and minnie arm lift in future, but for now, I can live with arms and legs, but boobs and  belly have to get fixed...I can hardly stand to make love to my hubby!!!  LOL  I know he will love the new me as well.  More to come later.  135 lbs  97 lbs gone forever.  

8-30-07  Can hardly believe I am 10 months out, getting plastics done and over with, and some other much needed bladder surgery out of the way.  I am in a lot of pain, but i am sure it will all be worth it, soon.  I am 13 days post op from TT/BL/BA, it is hard to tell what it all looks like  yet because i still have 2 JP drains, the ab binder, and of course wearing a bra 24/7.  But appt is this afternoon with doc to remove drains, I hope, then will run home take shower and some better pics.  
 
                 I also just got home from 3 days post op for bladder lift and some other work there, worst pain ever, I am sure I will be taking pain meds for a week or so.  Had on Q pain pump in hospital, but I was still in lots and lots of pain.  Probably won't have any pics of this surgery, but if anyone interesting in learning more, send me a msg.  It was with Dr. Alinsod, who is great, i can't wait to see my finished product.

                 On  a side note, we will be moving soon to Fort Worth, TX.  My hubby just received a promotion, he leaves next week, ouchy!  But, I most likely won't be following until Jan '08 because my bosses can't let me go yet due to staffing issues.  I hope it is sooner, but we shall see.  
                  I am down a total of 107 lbs pre/ 95 lbs post gone forever.  Loving life more than ever.

9-6-07  Ok, hitting 3 weeks post plastics, 1 week post bladder lift (very painful), finally showered, starting to feel better.  Still have to take pain meds, and hoping to go back to work on 9-14, we shall see.  

10-13-07  Ok, I am 2 months post TT/BL/BA, and healing nicely although some feeling coming back on tummy and muscles sometimes aching, I am sure this is surgery related and will discuss with PS next week.  The Bladder lift surgery is healing slowly still paingul, no pain meds for 3 weeks now, and been back to work since 9-14.   Down to size 2/4 and weighing 121 lbs. 

12-15-07  Wow, I cannot believe it is almost Christmas time.  Am healing from all the surgeries, TT still numb.  BL scars are worse than I expected, but unless I lift my arms are not noticeable.  Bladder surgery...hmmm, not sure successful, still seem to leak and considering the pain involved would not do again.  I have been expirementing more with different foods and can tolerate most in moderation, but want to be careful so I do not undo what this wonderful surgery/tool have offered me, so I keep close tabs on it.  
Also, at my 1 year post op appt the doc said to not do supplemental protein any longer, but after dropping it for 2 months, I noticed that I started losing a lot of hair again, so I am reintroducing it to my regiman. Not that I can't afford a little hair loss, I have tons of hair, but when it grows back, I can't stand the stubbly hair.  LOL   
Maintaining 121-122, size 2-4 pants, and XS,S, M shirts.  

03-03-08  Again, WOW, time flies by so quickly when you are not dieting!  LOL  Ok, so I have not been so good here lately...been really eating sweets a lot more than I should, and I can definately tell when I have had too much...it does not take much.  But, other than that, I am doing pretty good.  A couple of months back I was having a lot of gas issues, but seems to have subsided, seems to be associated with eating too much, go figure.  So, I make sure i stop a lot sooner.  Cloths all still fit really well, am up to 125-126 on most days, but considering my doc wanted me to gain 5 lbs, I figure that is ok.  Have not been doing to protein, but hairloss has seemed to stop, so that is ok.  We have moved to TX, so I need to find a new doctor to follow-up with.