ObesityHelp

I'm not much of a writer but I thought this might be a good way to keep tabs on myself.  I've been "fat" my whole life. I say it like that because looking back at photos of my childhood I clearly wasn't fat but I have always felt that I was and am. I really started to gain in grade 5 and 6 when I weighed in at 190 lbs. A large part of the weight for me had to do with sexual abuse and the shame that has plagued me ever since which is why I speak of it now. I work hard every day to battle the shame of my body and obesity.  And this surgery is going to help me claim the life and body I so desperately want and deserve. My highest weight 283 lbs and with the help of my surgeon and the team we work with, West Coast Bariatric Team and Garrat Wellness Center in Richmond BC Canada, I have lost 36 lbs. Many of my ideas of perfection and black and white thinking have changed, softened really. Some of my personality changes from going through the cognitive behavior therapy at Garrat Wellness Center have been such a life shift and has taught me to better accept myself and others for the true beauty inside. And I hope that one day I will accept myself wholey and be happy in my own skin.

My Favorite Quote;

Dear Human: You've got it all wrong. You didn't come here to master unconditional love. That is where you came from and where you will return. You came here to learn personal love. Universal love. Messy love. Sweaty love. Crazy love. Broken love. Whole love. Infused with divinity. Lived through the grace of stumbling. Demonstrated through the beauty of....messing up. Often. You didn't come here to be perfect. You already are. You came here to be gorgeously human. Flawed and fabulous. And then to rise again into remembering. ...RawforBeauty

Raven