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Start oil painting again!

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Member Interests
  • Dogs - I have 4 Yorkies, 3 rescues
  • Gardening & Horticulture - I have lots of landscaping to take care of, still learning
  • Home Improvement - 1/2 way finished with house. I was the contractor for my kitchen remodel
  • Interior Decoration - I have redone and remodeled almost all of my house I still have a rec room to do
  • Christianity - I work in AV on Sunday. I run the computer and the big screens.
  • Hockey - Nashville Predators/Season One Season Ticket Holder
  • Oil Painting - Working on a Jesus Painting and need encouragement
  • Married - Charlie for 37 years.
  • Stained Glass - Professional - Design and Build/Make/Install
  • Artist/Muralist - Went back to school at 53. A degree in Fine Art I love pencil and Oil paint

Latest Surgery Support Comments

  • Comment by rlrsbaby on 11/5/06 2:03 pm
    I will say prayers for you, I pray you have a quick and safe recovery. In a few days you will be feeling wonderful. Blessings to you. Sandi
  • Comment by calgal on 11/5/06 9:24 am
    hi linda, prayers have been said for a very safe surgery and a nice revcovery for you , tomorrow. hugs, sally
  • Comment by cyndy40 on 11/4/06 2:26 pm
    I am praying for a great surgery and quick recovery. Congratulations on taking this step!
Click here for the surgery support page
Fat. Female, and Fiftysomething soon to be Sexy, Slim and Sixty.  I was a small teenager but after the birth of my daughter in 1971 I began to gain and fight the weight battle.  So much so that in 1979 I had to have my gallbladder removed the old fashion way.  I continued the rollercoster of lose and gain for the next 35 years.  Enough is enough, my health is suffering.
Linda T.'s Blog
Linda T.'s Blog


Depression
on February 11, 2008 6:10 am
Why do weight issues just increase the amount of depression for me?  I am an emotional eater anyway (have I mentioned that before) and depression just increases the desire to put something in my mouth.  Of course all the medical issues of last year and this year is the major reason for the depression.  I feel as if I am in a Catch 22 thing, a constant circle with no relef.
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Happy New Year?????
on January 2, 2008 6:31 am
Happy New Year to everyone!  I was crazy over Christmas, do I have to explain.  My addiction to sugar is killing me, really.  I am back on the blood pressure meds.  That happened before Christmas before I gained back part of the weight I lost during my surgery and recovery.  I am also back on Nexium for reflux.  No band and the acid can come up.  Of course I am on the antidrepressant meds, I would be bonkers by now.  Also back on the allergy medications.  I hate having to take all this stuff again.  It is all depressing.  I am glad in a way 2007 is gone.  All the pain and suffering I went through is over BUT--  my band is gone now and I am on my own and it doesn't seem to be working.

My goal for 2008 is to live to 2009 and beyond.  That start with taking care of me.  But how...........
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Starting Over on a different road.
on December 19, 2007 5:36 am
I though living with a band was hard.   What was I thinking.  Living without it is twice as hard.  All my old eating habits have creeped back just like old times.  A whole year has passed, boy what a year can hold.  I am back to normal.  I went to my regular Gastro and had a EGD which showed no damage to the inside of my stomach.  No scar tissue or narrowing of the upper part.  The strange pains have gone away, the scars on the belly look angry and red but time will fade over time.  My husband and I are the only two that will see them. 

I have gained weight since the surgery.  I lost around 16 lbs during the time when I could not eat or would not eat. Then the ice cream and Ensure that just set me up for sweets and ice cream.  The little voice in my brain that was saying "Stop now or get sick"  is gone.  It was still there when I had to drink those high calorie milk shakes, but has since been quiet.  Everything I was unable to eat or that was off limits has been a craving since. A lot of this stuff is depression I know.  It is just part of mourning I guess. Christmas is always a hard time for me because of the stress and all the sweets and fatty things served.  But.... how do I recover!  How do I stop this?  What do I do, do I diet again?  If I diet, what diet? I am still down 30 lbs out of the 40 that I had lost.  I GOT TO STOP THIS NOW!
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Road to Recovery
on November 12, 2007 7:03 pm
I am feeling better and getting back my strength.  I still have some mysterious pain in my belly.  Not sure what that is.  Back is better no more spasms.  

Picked up my Mom at the nursing home and took her back to her apartment at the assisted living place.  She is glad to be home.  She still worries about me,  I guess mothers always do.  

With all that has gone on in the last 2 months my house is a wreck.  Only the minimum has been done.  Nothing has been put away. So clutter is everywhere.  I got the name of someone to clean my house but I am ashamed to call her.  I would have to clean up before she came and I don't have the energy for that yet.  My daughter just wants to come in with a garbage bag and let me start over.  HA HA.

 
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"one in a Million" Part 3
on November 7, 2007 7:16 pm
Oct 7 - 14: I felt good the whole weekend or at least till Sunday night.  I started having more pain in the chest all the way through to the back.  Pain that my medicine was not able to handle.  I was up pacing the floor all night several nights the following week.  Sleeping when the pain meds worked.

Oct 15 :  I couldn't take the pain any more and I was not eating.   I called my Surgeon and he suggested I go to the ER.  I went to ER and was on IV, had another Cat scan and some good pain meds.  Out come.......ulcer or raw stomach from meds and antiobotics, not eating.  They put me on Carafate for 3 weeks.  The pain in my back related to stomach??????  My Mom fell that morning and was take to the hospital.  My brother and Sister had to do it without me.

Oct 16 - 17 : My days got better but my nights were bad, everytime I layed down my back would spasm and the pain was so bad that the pain meds didn't work.  I even went to the max amount I could take just to sleep 4 hours a night.

Oct 18 :  Pain so bad I couldn't take it any more.  Went back to my Family Doc.  He put me on a muscle relaxer and gave me a different pain med.

Oct 19 - 21 :  These days a blur, pain meds and pain.  My husband force feeding me and making be drink.

Oct 22:  Back to my Family Doc.  I have having more muscle pain and other things related to not eating.  He put me on 3 milkshakes a day with real Ice cream, low fat with an Ensure.  They were good and felt good too.

Oct 25:  I felt good enough to have my hair cut and colored.  It had been 6 weeks and my hair was a mess, I had resorted to bandanas.  It took all I had but my hair looked so much better.

Oct 26:  We had a dinner at church, my husband said I shouldn't go but I did.  Could not stay the whole time had to leave before entertainment was over.

Oct 27 - 28:  I paid for getting up and out too soon.  Still taking the pain pills to sleep.  I am a big couch potato.

Oct 29:  Back is still a problem so I went to my Chropractor.  Yes, I am old and have spurs on spine and spine out of alignment after being in bed so much and favoring my stomach to move.  So begins 3 days a week to help with the back.

Now :  I am still dealing with a low level of energy.  Still some stomach discomfort when I eat.  I am eating too much.  I did gain back 10 of the 16lbs I lost during 4 weeks.  Ice cream will do that to ya.  I am still mouring my band and scared of gaining.  
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My Story

I found this site 2/16/2004.  I feel so fat and disgusting!  I want to be smaller and able to do so many things.  My medical problems are increasing.  I read and read but knew the open surgery was not for me.  In Feb. 2005 I started NurtiSystem.  I lost 35 lbs and was looking and feeling better than I had in years.  But........after a couple of months it started creeping back.  By Sept. 2006 it was all back plus 3 lbs. the highest of my life.  Depression is my shadow and once again overwhelmed me.  I accidently run across my bookmark for this site and started reading and thinking again..  This time asking questions.