Photos
I'm Not In Any Photos Yet.
Before & AfterThere are currently no before and after photos for this member. See these instructions if you wish to submit your own Before & After photos.
Goals
68 People in progress, 16 People achieved this |
42 People in progress, 46 People achieved this |
0 People in progress, 1 Person achieved this |
8 People in progress, 2 People achieved this |
62 People in progress, 23 People achieved this |
|
Surgeon TestimonialEliot Sieloff, M.D.My first impression of Dr. S was a very good one. He's knowledgeable, kind, soft spoken and he makes sure you know everything you need to know. Him and his office staff are AMAZING!! They are very diligent and make sure you are taken care of. If a problem arises They are VERY good at taking care of it ASAP!! There's nothing I didn't/don't like about Dr. Sieloff. Future patients should know that he will do whatever it takes to take care of you and guide you through the process. He's realistic and he treats his patients like real people, he addresses the risks and assures you he and his team do everything to minimize those risks. I can't speak highly enough of Dr. Sieloff and his staff, Jody his nurse is amazing and they are so in tune with their patients! He's not only a VERY competent Surgeon, but his bedside manner is amazing! |
This is my journey to a new and better me!!  
Changes, new viewpoints and Life!!! on September 29, 2011 11:44 pm
So It's been quite some time since I last updated here! havent had a computer! Lots of stuff going on in life, lots of changes! April 1st my husband had RNY and has done remarkable! Other than a stricture he was complication free and recovered VERY well! He had to really adjust to slowing down and making sure he chewed his food well. I think we get so used to just shoveling food in and not even really tasting what we're eating. Those habits tend to be hard to break! He's now down 100 lbs and I'm so proud of him and everything he's accomplished! Making the choice to get healthy has been the best choice we've made together.
For me it was VERY different seeing him go through surgery! I'm so used to being the patient and him always taking care of me! I wasn't sure how I would respond to that role switching! It was to say the least very difficult but I know it's something I had to experience! Waiting for him to come out of surgery was hard, thank God I had two very good friends there to keep me as calm as possible! I thought I'd be ok and for the most part I was....until they brought him into his room!!! WOW, I wasn't expecting to react the way I did to seeing him white as the sheets on the bed, helpless, and barely awake! They assured me he was fine but my mind went to instant worry! He's never been through surgery before so I didn't know how it would affect him. He got sick and was throwing up mucus and some old blood which scared me even more! Even in this state he was trying to get me to go to the hall so I didn't have to see him throw up because he knows I have a weak stomach. I'll admit it, seeing him like this when for the last 8+ years he's always been the strong one so to see him vulnerable and weak broke my heart! There were several times I had to leave the room because I didn't want him to see me so upset. I finally realized how he's felt for so many years as he's watched me go through so much medically! I finally got how helpless he feels when he sees me hurting and helpless! It's hard to watch the person you love most go through that! Makes you want to take away their pain and fix them! It was something I needed to experience!
As the frist night went on his color became more normal and he was more awake and starting to get back to his sarcastic self! He rebounded very quickly and wasn't in to much pain!
After things settled and he came home and began recovery I had just passed my one year mark and decided to talk to my Dr. about our goal of trying to get pregnant! My husband and I had talked about it for a while and we've wanted to become parents for many years but because of my weight, PCOS, and fertility issues I was told it would probably never happen! One of my main reasons for having weight loss surgery was to be able to have children! It wasn't just something we could do without much thought! I have to deal with a lot of medical issues and mental health issues that complicBate things and the choice to get pregnant wasn't going to be an easy one! Once I talked to my surgeon and had his ok to go ahead and start trying I had to discuss with my other Drs about the safest way to go about this. I was on serious psych meds that I had to get off of BEFORE getting pregnant. It wouldn't be safe to get pregnant then come off the meds as that would more than likely cause a spiral and wouldn't be safe for me or baby! So I made the choice to wean off of most of the psych meds I was taking. I was left on the antidepressant and the anxiety medications for the time being.
I've learned that even the best laid plans sometimes just don't go the way you think they should/will! We try so hard to have control over a situation, trying to make it happen when we want it to happen and make it the way we want it to be! Ummm....life doesn't work like that! Our plans mean nothing in the grand scheme of life! I've realized that God's plans are always bigger than my own and don't always happen when I think they should! I got into tracking my cycles, making sure I timed everything right and it became stressful and every negative test would break my heart and it would make me feel like a failure! I began to wonder why I should expect anything more than what I've gotten for years! Old negative self talk kicked in and really messed with my head! I love that I have people in my life who will bring me back into reality and get me to see things in a different way. I decided that we shouldn't try so hard to make something happen and just let things be what they are! I had gotten to a place where I HATED with every fiber of my being, taking a pregnancy test! I was thinking why waste the money because every time I got one, one of two things would ALWAYS happen! Either it would be negative or my period would start so I put it off as long as I could because it was just that awful!
Woke up one morning and hung my head as a moped my way to the bathroom, did what I had to do and waited for the obvious! As I washed my hands I glanced over and to my amazement I saw TWO very clear lines!! I just stood there waiting for one to go away then screamed for my husband! Poor guy thought I was hurt so he comes running down the stairs and all I could say was "what is that?" pointing to the bathroom counter! Both of us were speechless and I don't think it really set in. We were about to leave and I remember a friend asking me if I was ok because he said I looked like someone had just given me the most shocking news.....um YEA!! 4 positive pregnancy tests later it started to sink in that this was really happening!
It's now been 4 1/2 months and things have been very chaotic! I'm high risk because of the blood clot I had after WLS and because of my medical history. I knew this wasn't going to be easy but I had no idea just how hard it was going to be! My first appointment was good. I'll never forget the moment I saw the baby for the first time and in the middle of this little mass was a flickering, then she turned on the sound!! The most amazing sound I've ever heard! At that moment it became very real and my husband was wrapped! We had a scare at 12 weeks with bleeding and weren't sure if baby was going to make it but all turned out fine. Just when I started to relax I get a call telling me that I have a rare blood clotting disorder! It's scary and can be dangerous but I'm glad it was caught and there's something that can be done to ensure I have a healthy pregnancy! I've lost some weight but not to much and have remained the same weight for most of the pregnancy so far. I am battling the self image monster who wants to try to convince me that I'm regaining all the weight I've lost and I'm getting bigger! I have to keep reminding myself...it's baby, not fat!! I think it's something most women who've had WLS and go on to get pregnant deal with! The fear that they'll lose all the progress they made. I wish it wasn't such an issue for so many because it's not healthy! Other than elevated pain, not being able to keep much of anything down and bouts of intense anxiety and depression We're very excited!
WLS has given me my life back, given me the chance to be healthy and given me the greatest gift of all...the chance to become a mother! That alone makes this whole journey worth as I wanted kids for so many years, looking back I can't imagine going through pregnancy being as sick as I was! 450+ lbs with extremely high blood pressure, severe pain, sleep apnea, gerd, headed straight for diabetes and heart disease...there's NO way that would've resulted in a healthy pregnancy or baby! I'm very grateful that I allowed myself the chance to be as healthy as possible before bringing a child into the world! I couldn't take care of myself, how would I have been able to care for an infant?
I look forward to the future and what this journey brings next! It's always interesting and I'm always experiencing things now that I never thought I would be!
2 comments | Leave a comment.
Can't believe it's been a year!! on March 25, 2011 8:54 pm
This last year has gone by fast but it's been a crazy ride and it's far from over. I survived my first year as a post op and am doing good overall! It's hard to wrap my mind around all that's changed in the last year. So many ups and downs, little things that make this all worth while. The things I can do now that I wouldn't dream of even trying a year ago are vast! My blood pressure and cholesterol are perfect, I can see my feet, shower standing up, walk a mile and not feel like I'm dying, tie my shoes without the knot being on the side, sit in any chair, booth and feel comfortable, cross my legs, have my husband pick me up without breaking his back, and many many more! For me all these small things mean more than the number on the scale. It's important but When I went into this journey my 2 main goals were to be healthy, and to be able to have children! I can honestly say if I were to not lose another pound yet be healthy and be able to have babies, I'd be OK with that. I've lost 170 pounds and there are no words to describe how grateful I am to be where I'm at! WLS has saved my life in more ways than I can count.
I can't sit here and tell you it was in any way easy or always positive because it hasn't been. There have been moments of regret, frustration, battles with my mind, trying so hard to not give into those old habits, relearning everything when it comes to eating, nutrition, and who I am. I've always felt that the psychological aspect of this journey was just as important as the other aspects and still feel that way. As I work on getting to know and like this new me, I am also working on old issues and old behaviors that are so hard to overcome.
Looking back a year ago this journey seemed impossible, overwhelming and something I wasn't sure I could do but the more time I spend on this journey the more I start to understand that I have it within me to be healthy and to live the life I deserve to live. This past year has shown me that anything is possible! What's next? Well, I get to support my husband on his WLS journey and we get to start our family! I'm blessed and grateful to be where I am and I look forward to what God has in store for me next!!
3 comments | Leave a comment.
1 yr visit with surgeon! on March 18, 2011 4:33 pm
My one year isn't until the 26th but I had my one year post op visit last Wednesday. It went really well and he's very impressed with how I've done. His goal for me at the one year mark was 129-135 pounds lost well I blew his goal out of the water, lol I'm down 166 as of this morning from my surgery weight of 426! He's happy with how I'm progressing and says my consistant weight loss has showed him I'm doing what i'm supposed to be doing. He's given me the go ahead to start trying to get pregnant which has been a process because it's not as simple as just getting pregnant for me. I've had to in the last few months wean off dangerous medications, start taking extra vitamins and it's been exhausting and hard to deal with at times but I know the end result will be worth it. Having children was one of the main goals for me having WLS to begin with so to know that dream is more atainable now is amazing. I'm seeing a therapist to help me deal with the self image issues and other things that are creeping back into my life. It's vital for me to deal with old issues and find healthy ways to cope with life and stress. He's helping me deal with and address the self defeating mentality that I've had most of my life. I'm excited to see how far I've come in the last year and can't believe all the changes that have taken place. It's just the beginning and it'll take some getting used to!
2 comments | Leave a comment.
Walking out of my comfort zone! on February 16, 2011 8:03 pm
Participating in any walking event always sounded like a good idea and I always thought to myself "maybe someday". You see, walking was a major challenge not even a year ago. At 426+ pounds, a major back injury and bad ankles all made walking something I couldn't do much of. It limited what I did, where I went, and severely affected my life. I became a recluse, a shut in, agoraphobic and was terrified of simply going outside of my house because I knew the physical pain that would follow. 158 pounds lighter and walking is a lot easier these days. There's still the back injury and the bad ankles which still give me problems but I'm not limited like I was a year ago. Stairs don't scare me anymore, shopping doesn't terrify me nearly as much, and just simply leaving my home is something I do a lot more of! I'm making this year a year of I can, versus all the I can'ts that have been my life for so long! I find myself being more social and forcing myself to step outside my comfort zones and challenge myself to take on life! Last weekend I was told about the Walk For Life that happens every year in support of A woman's pregnancy center here in Tallahassee and I told my husband I wanted to do it! Last year I would've had every excuse in the book as to why I couldn't do something like this, but this year is different! I have a few friends who are into marathons and I have watched their journeys and have been inspired. Hoping that someday I would be able to do something like that! What better way to start than to walk? It's only a few miles but it's SO much more than I could have done less than a year ago! So, on Feb. 26th, which happens to be 11 months since I had weight loss surgery I will get up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday and participate in The Walk for Life! As someone who loves children and desires to have a family it's a cause that means a lot to me. I know how important women's health is and how important it is to support healthy pregnancy! If you'd like to help me by sponsoring me please let me know or you can go to this website lifeline-awpc.org/online%20sponsor.htm and make an online donation or pledge! Amanda Matthews is my name :)
I'm super excited to challenge myself to step out of my comfort bubble and actively participate in life!
Be the first to leave a comment.
10 months and a battle with my brain! on January 28, 2011 9:37 am
I can't believe it's already been 10 months since I had WLS!! It's been a surreal, crazy ride and somehow it all seems to be catching up to me now. I think I've handled the changes overall pretty well until recently. Over the last ten months I've had moments where I think I'm still bigger but usually I can look at my progress pictures and snap out of it. For some reason lately even when I look at pictures or in the mirror I see HUGE!! I want to put on my over sized sweat pants and t shirts and hide! Nothing seems to look good and I have this perception that I'm still so big. I have a lot of sagging skin, especially in my belly and I know that doesn't help matters much. The reality of it is, I'm not that 450 pound woman I was a year ago!! I have lost 152 pounds, I see the number on the scale and the jeans that are 10 sizes smaller but my mind doesn't get it!! Maybe it's a funk I'm in or something! I'm seeing a therapist so that I can get out of my head and learn to embrace this new person I'm becoming. It's scary because I'm at a place I've never been before, I'm doing things I've never done before and It's all foreign to me! It'll take time to adjust and I know that I'll get there, it's just frustrating when your mind doesn't see the reality of what's there! Regardless, I'm proud of myself for all I've accomplished in the last ten months and I'm really enjoying living life! I'm a work in progress I know! I guess when you spend most of your life so big, it's hard to grasp the changes and the smaller you! I just have to keep reminding myself that I'm not that person anymore! It's hard to believe that I'm almost a year out but I don't regret a thing and I'm anxious to see what lies ahead! With a little help and a lot of faith I know it can only get better right?
I weigh myself on Fridays because that's the day I had surgery and this morning I stepped on the scale and saw 274, 152 pounds lost since surgery!! WOW!  Now to beat it into my thick head, lol I think I'll go try on my old jeans, maybe that will help!
3 comments | Leave a comment.
|
Archive
Tags
|
My Story
I'm Amanda, I'm 29 and I live in North Florida with my wonderful husband Ted and our 7 yr old Puppy Toby. I've been overweight most my life and I've come to the conclusion that this is my only hope for a sucessful weight loss. I've tried every diet/exercise program imaginable, some safe, some not so safe. After a few years of research and going back and forth I made up my mind that this is what's best for me. It's VERY difficult for me to lose weight on my own because of medical conditions and a back injury that keeps me from moving like I need to. I have goals that I would like to achieve like having a family, being able to walk through the mall without hurting, being able to shop for and find clothes that fit without having to special order them....and many more. I have a wonderful support system and I have someone who's just ahead of me on this journey to help me through it. I'm excited for what's to come!
|
Waiting for Approval
Send Message
Member Card
Block Member
Health Tracker 
Comment by 
Comment by 
