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  • Username: mecoppertop
  • Location: WA, USA
  • Member Since: 4/6/2012
  • BMI: 29.4
  • Post Op
  • Surgery Type: RNY (08/21/12)
  • Surgeon: Ross McMahon M.D.
Friends

mecoppertop has 6 Friends

Brenda C.
Joanna C.
RosyKate 73

chubarella
onpurpose
Dolores L.
Before & After

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Goals

my first goal is to get below 200 pounds.

175 People
 in progress, 
90 People
 achieved this
View The Goals Page
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mecoppertop's Blog
mecoppertop's Blog

Typing and Tears
posted on 7/7/12 12:34 pm
I'm so stressed about the job issue that I've been breaking out in small hives. I barely sleep, which I know is in part due to a need to adjust my estrodial dosage, but more so due to just not being able to shut off my brain. So, there I am in the middle of the night, stressed, itching, dying for a smoke and a pound of good chocolates. Good thing I'm not into alcohol in a major way, or I'm sure I'd be pouring myself a few glasses.

I wish I knew how to deal with all of this without the crutches that I've used for so long. I guess I'm doing ok but I haven't been great on my medically supervised diet this week. I haven't gained anything, just stayed the same. I guess that's a good thing since I indulged in that fast food that I wrote about. I also had a pulled pork sandwich, cole slaw, and an ear of corn on the 4th of July. Oh yeah, and a cupcake. Honestly, I could have had seconds on everything, it was so good and I was so hungry to be placated by something, anything.

I'm terrified that in a year from now, I'll still be jobless, too poor to buy all the vitamins and such needed to remain healthy post-op, and that I'll just give up. Unemployed, homeless and malnourished is not the way I want to go through life.

I'm just having a really bad week. I know this and hope like crazy that it will get better.


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