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Goals

To sit with my legs crossed!!!

73 People
 in progress, 
80 People
 achieved this

weigh 160lbs by august 17th

1 Person
 in progress, 
0 People
 achieved this

be 185lbs by march 25th my anniversary

0 People
 in progress, 
1 Person
 achieved this

be in onederland by christmas

1 Person
 in progress, 
2 People
 achieved this

Lose 50lbs by Christmas

1 Person
 in progress, 
2 People
 achieved this
View Other Goals
Latest Surgery Support Comments

  • Comment by Johanna V. on 9/14/10 8:08 am
    How r u doing girl?? Hope everything is going well
  • Comment by Robin S. on 8/17/10 10:54 am
    It is 11 a.m. Pacific Time and I've been thinking of you all morning. Can't wait for your first udpate. HUGS to you girl.
Click here for the surgery support page
I make food porn http://sushifabush.tumblr.com/ 
 


MeliT's Blog
MeliT's Blog


If you live in South Florida
on September 26, 2011 5:42 pm
 I have some Torani sugar free syrups here. I don't use them anymore. Haven't used them in a long time. If you're recently out of surgery or having surgery soon you'll probably really want these. I have a variety of flavors, some are opened but most are full. I need to make some space in my kitchen and I know these can be expensive and hard to find. If you can drive down to Miami you can have them for free!

Let me know, 
Melissa
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thanks everyone!
on September 3, 2011 10:26 am
 thanks for all the sweet comments you guys left me on my last post. i really appreciate all the love!!
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Pics from my 1yr anniversary
on September 1, 2011 9:44 am
 I forgot to post these till now. A few days after my 1 yr mark the family and i went to nyc for my cousin's wedding. i wanted to share the pics with you.




and just for good measure....a couple of before pics...







we look so much cuter together now



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Today is my 1 yr Surgeversary
on August 17, 2011 8:28 am
 this time last year i was being strapped in, poked and prodded and funnily enough i had my period that day as well. i was gearing up for surgery. i was anxious, a little nervous but mostly excited to start my new life. if i had known how i would feel when i woke up i would have been more nervous. lol. recovery was tough but i soldiered on because i had no choice.

 

now a year has gone by and though i'm not where i should be yet i'm still super proud of myself. i've changed my lifestyle and i would not want to go back to eating the way i used to. i can eat a little of anything now. the key is moderation. i would feel so gross if i just ate one bad thing after another. i don't want to go back to eating that way. i'm not waiting till i can eat that way again. i have a new relationship with food. and i don't use it to comfort myself anymore. i still get excited about food. i love food. and unless i'm really excited for it or its really delicious i won't waste my hunger on it. i have such little room for food, i want to use it on really lovely things that i enjoy. if you get no joy from your food, its a waste. and i get my joy from beautiful things. new flavors, complex tastes, things made with love. the key is to always be conscious of what you're eating. if you just scarf it down you're not only missing it, you're also not being aware of what or how much you're eating.

 

i'm proud of myself for changing my eating habits. even though every now and then i do indulge, i totally feel like i'm in a good place to have children now and that i won't pass on bad eating habits. i will try my very best to teach them to love all the right things from the beginning so that they don't have to struggle with weight like i did.

 

as for how i'm doing, i'm def more active though not working out as much as i should. i usually try for 2-3 days a week but its been a hectic month and there have been weeks with no work outs at all. but i'm def stronger and have a lot more energy and stamina. i've never missed a day of vitamins. i'm getting about 30g of protein on a bad day and 60-80g on a good day. i could be doing better with that but sometimes you just want to eat things that don't have protein (veggies, etc). and if i don't drink a protein shake its hard for me to get a lot of proteins in. 

 

i still drink only water (crystal light or other to go powders) or tea (with sweeteners), haven't had soda since before surgery. or alcohol. but i did have lemonade the other day. wow. that was a blast in a glass. there are certain things i stay away from (soda, french fries) because they're trigger foods and i don't wanna opena  floodgate with them. i have lost 92lbs give or take 1 or 2. i find myself hovering around there. my weightloss has slowed to a crawl. that doesn't stop me from trying to keep losing. my goal is still 140lbs. i'm at 168. it will take me a while but i'm still working on it.

 

i'm carrying most of my weight in my stomach and panniculus (apron) but everywhere else you can really see the diff. my shoulders look so fantastic. my arms aren't that bad. my legs are looking great and my thighs have all but deflated. just my damn stomach. one day when i reach goal i'll cut it off. but i'm not at the right weight yet. also i'm trying to get pregnant so all that will have to wait. i figure the way my body is now my baby will have lost of room to move around. lol.


i notice that i can fit more in my pouch than before. but thankfully i still have restriction. i'll never be able to eat the same amount as people who haven't had WLS and for that i am grateful and i will be very vigilent to never abuse my pouch.
 

i'm so unbelievably happy to finally be where i wanted to be (trying for a baby) and i would do it all again. this surgery saved my life. i only wish i had done it sooner.

my husband is taking me out to dinner to celebrate. i'll post a pic later.

5 comments | Leave a comment.

ugh
on July 28, 2011 7:17 am
here i am minding my business, then you blow through with your drama. and i remember how much i wanted to end this friendship the last time you did this to me. but its impossible to just cut you off. because you might fly into a rage. and you know all my secrets. i wish i could just slowly become more and more distant but you constantly insert yourself into my life. i was feeling great, then you come along being all dramatic accusing me of being rude because something i said in my typical sarcastic humor offended you. when you normally would just give it back to me. but nooo you were having one of your (many many many) moments. so fucking dramatic. and of course you took that shit out on me. you're so confrontational, and even when i apologize (when i so didn't need to) you still keep going. all i want to do is delete you off everything and avoid you completely. it takes  ALOT for me not to do that. and its for my own protection. because you're so unstable. so what do i do? i just stop posting on fb and twitter. just hiding out from everyone, because of you. 

you send me an apology tweet. i don't answer. you say "do you still love me?" ughhhhhh

does anyone else think this sounds like an unhealthy relationship?????????????????

just apologize and i go right back to you only to go through this every couple of months??? ughhhhhhhhhhhh i wish you would just move away. i don't need this. you're not my girlfriend. i don't wanna put up with your shit. let your man put up with it. we have a stage 5 clinger people. why does this always happen to me? i always attract clingy people.
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My Story

 Oof...my story is long and I'm sure its much like all your stories. Been heavy since puberty. Which is funny because I was always a very petite child with way too much energy. But once puberty hit the weight just continued to pile on. I've tried more things that I'd like to admit and spent way more money than I care to remember trying to lose weight. I've found that if I try really hard I can lose up to 20 or 30 lbs but thats it.  I end up gaining it all back and then some as they say.

Last year I was finally diagnosed with PCOS. Everything suddenly made sense. And I felt a huge relief because I knew I wasn't some monster. My body had been working against me all these years. I was also pissed that no one bothered to put the pieces together till now. When I think of all the years I spent being unhealthy. I came very close to getting diabetes. Thank God they caught this when they did. I've been on Metformin since sept of 09. It has helped my insulin resistance and many of my numbers are looking better. However I was only about to lose about 25lbs and then I've sort of been staying around the 20lb mark since then, fluctuating but more so in the up direction. 

I just turned 30. A baby is something I have wanted since I was in my early 20s. I got married in 2006. In 2007 I gave myself a 3 yr plan. I would get a job, lose weight, get a house and then I can have a baby. I set up these goals for myself because my husband and I want to be practical and be in the best situation for parenthood. So A year went by, two years, no job, no house. Then in 2009 I went back to school for Video Production. Then I discovered about the PCOS. I was at around 282lbs. I was told by more than one doctor to consider gastric bypass. But I was not hearing it. No way. I wasn't that bad off. So here we are June 2010. I have no job (not for lack of trying believe you me!), we're in the process of getting a house but we're waiting for the bank to approve the short sale, all in all I'm pretty much in the same place. I have had to watching my friends get pregnant and have babies and it kills me. I cry about it often. I have wanted to be pregnant and have a child for so long now. I want it more than most people I know. At this point I was just like fuck the job, fuck the weight, I want a baby. 

But there's so many issues with someone my weight getting pregnant. And I know at this weight I simply won't have the energy or stamina to take care of a baby or a child. And I don't want to be a lazy mom. I've been lazy too long. It finally dawned on me. I finally gave in to the realization that something drastic needs to happen. I need this surgery. All my doctors think its the right thing for me. I know everyone in my family will be relieved. I'm ready to do whatever it takes. Even if it means waiting 2 more years (torture) to have a baby.

At this point I'm just praying my insurance will cover it because we are in no position financially (one income, one care, house buying) to pay for this ourselves. And our parents aren't in the position to help. So this really is my last shot. Please please please let this happen for me. I certainly have paid my dues. I've spent 20yrs being fat and trying to lose weight. I want to be that fun outgoing person I was as a kid. I don't want to hide inside anymore. I want to make this change before my trooper of a body gives up on me. I want to live.

*update*
insurance didn't cover surgery. in fact my husband's company insurance specifically excluded weight loss surgery. our only choice was to pay out of pocket. so we ended up giving up the house we were closing on. definitely a sacrifice but well worth it. please know that everything happens for a reason. if you don't get something you want, its because you're not ready, because something better is coming. i truly believe that.