melly37

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  That would be great if I were actually at my goal weight!! 

I had pretty much an entire month of eating what I want, just giving up all intentions of doing well.  I was 3 weeks late on my period and had hormones from hell....not an excuse, just a factor.  I also didn't go to the gym, as my gym buddy was on vacation (I couldn't have possibly gone without her! ha ha) , when she was back, I was feeling really crappy.  Luckily, I didn't do too much damage....I am at 179 lbs. 

My boyfriend and I just got back from Tucson, it was a great mini-vacation, getting to see his sons.  I Tucson.  So many good places to eat, palm trees and fun places to shop.  Thankfully, my brain seems to back from vacation also.  It's Monday, and a fresh start is here. 

I have packed a good, healthy and low-carb lunch.  I have low-carb snacks, and I will do my 3.5 mile walk at lunch.  I am going to the gym after work.  I am so ready to get back in to the losing game!  I really am.  I have a checkup with my surgeon scheduled for the 17th.  My goal is to weigh in at 167 by that date! 

I have an appointment with my PCP on the 6th, just an annual physical.  I am going to ask him to check my hormones.  I will be 43 this November...guess I could be starting the "change".  It sucks, but it is what it is. 

I almost find it comforting that I have only gained back about 3-4 lbs in the month I took off of dieting.  I guess maintenance will be fairly easy!  ha ha ha  For now, my mind is geared towards getting to goal first.........THEN we can talk maintenance!!  Have a great week, everyone!

I am doing my best to be up front with myself and everyone around me.  I am working on being accountable to myself.  I am still waiting for my period to show up....so ,dealing with those hormonal issues.  HOWEVER, it hit me yesterday....I don't have any control over that.  None.  I DO however, have control over what I put in my mouth.  I can choose how I deal with my hormones, stress, and anxieties.  I have to assert some control in my life, SOMEWHERE, and I choose to be proud of myself by staying low carb and hitting the gym! 

  Yep!  That's me....hiding from everyone.  I have been so bad the past few weeks, I didn't even want to acknowledge it.  ARGH.  I am not sure what is going on with my body, but my gosh, my hormones are acting stupid!!  I could understand it if I was losing gobbs of weight....but that's not the case, so I am not sure why my body is acting weird.

I am about 2 weeks late on my period.    Ummmmmm, NO, I am about 95% sure that I am NOT pregnant!  I have an IUD, and just in case, I took a test yesterday and it was negative.  I really don't want to be starting over at 42!  Yikes!!

Well, if I am 2 weeks late, that means I have been going through about 3 weeks straight of PMS symptoms.  The cravings, the hunger, tiredness...all of it.  I will even get some cramps here and there, but they will go away. 

I am angry with myself and not excusing myself, at all.  I have not been limiting my carbs very well.  Some days, I have been eating whatever I feel like, and some days I am pretty much on plan.  I have seen the scale go back up to 178, and I WAS down to 174.  I know if I can stay low carb for a few days, I will see about 2 pounds go quickly because it's more than likely water weight.....but, I staying low carb is the key. 

If I don't start by Monday, I will call and schedule an appointment with my doctor.  I am just frusrated to no end with my lack of will power right now.  I am seriously thinking of finding a good therapist that works with food addictions.  What I need to do, more than anything, is find the motivation I have been lacking.  I seriously don't want to see my surgeon next month with so little progress.  How freaking embarassing. 

Hopefully, everyone else is working their tool!  I will get back on this horse, and keep trying!!  Someday we will ride off in to the sunset together, I promise!!