ObesityHelp

well has been a long time since I've been here but I have some regain that I'm not happy with, back up to 206 and now fighting with it like crazy.  It just makes me so angry at myself that it drepresses me, and of course back to old ways, when depressed I eat, which is the reason for me being depressed.  Sick I know but I've got to break free from this devil in my path.  Pray, pray, pray....

I feel great!!  My joints don't hurt, I like walking, running and riding my bike and chasing my kids is so much fun now.  I am very happy I did this.  I am now down 84 lbs and still losing 1-4 lbs a week.  The more exercise I do the more weight comes off.  I know it will soon slow, but for now I will joy in the fact that I am now smaller than I have been in 10 years...WOOHOO.  I tried on my husbands size 42 shorts and they fit....OMG!!!  Not a big deal to some, but a huge deal for me, I weigh less than him now and I can wear his clothes.....  I'll keep working hard cause it still ain't easy to say no to sliders....

Visited with Dr. Mathews on 12/16/08 and was down 67 lbs since surgery date, down 75 lbs from all time high weight back in June 2008.  Doc said I was doing well and to keep up the good work.  The biggest problem I am continuing to struggle with is head hunger and not having time to get some good quality exercise in on a daily basis.  I have not had any hair loss issues or any other issues.  I have found that nothing really causes me to dump, because I have had some sweets, but I only take one bite because I'm too scared to eat anymore than a bite.

I just really think I need to seek some counseling both psychological and nutritional.  I just want to make sure I stay on track on don't pick up on bad habits.  The one food that I contiue to struggle with is chips, not potatoe chips, but tortilla chips...I love them with salsa, but don't quite think I should be having them, so I will do my best to stay away from them.  Peanuts have become my best friend...

I am happy to report that I am still losing weight at a pretty good pace 3-5 lbs a week.  To some this doesn't sound like much, but when you have been used to conventional diets only helping you loose 3-5 lbs a month, this is pretty good.  I think too many people expect to loose it really really fast, but keep remembering, it has taken some of us a lifetime to put on this weight.

Even though I continue to loose weight, I am still quite depressed.  Much of that has to do with the general struggles of life...Finances are my biggest problem.  I have met some great Christian examples on this site, but still having trouble with my own faith.  I know God loves me and I know He will take care of me and my family, but I still have the hardest time giving it all over to him.  I then think to myself how selfish I am to believe that I am the only person with problems.  I have read several peoples profiles and journeys and found that my life is a breeze compared to others.  I have a wonderful husband, two precious children and a family that loves me.  I do not have riches, nor will I ever.  I have never wanted to be rich, I have only ever wanted to be able to pay all of my bills on time and have a little left over to be able to have fun with my kids,  but these days there is not even enough to pay the bills.  Robbing Peter to pay Paul is no fun.

Well that is enough of that.  This was supposed to be a woohoo moment because I am losing weight and feeling great....  Until next time..