ObesityHelp

I want to address my awful experience at the hospital real quick. I already knew that this hospital would be like this from the first surgery but I only stayed overnight then and this was so much worse. Ok, on the first afternoon I had a male nurse. I kept telling him that I was extremely hot and couldn't he do something about the heat. I had my window all the way open in November in Chicago and was still sweating bullets. It wasn't just me either, I was a little feverish but even he said how hot that room was. By the end of his shift I had asked him 5 times about the heat and finally just told him to bring me some ice so I could put it on my body to cool off. Ok, after his shift I had the very best nurse of my entire stay. I give this nurse mad props because she was very attentive to my needs. As soon as she got there and saw me with the ice she said, I can get a fan for you. All I am thinking is I have been complaining all afternoon and this fool could have got me a fan. So anyway, she did and I was more comfortable. I slept in what seemed like 15 min increments day and night. That same nurse helped me wash up and brush my teeth at around 5:30am, I was awake and ready to freshen up. This was the only nurse that was attentive to me like that. The rest of my stay I had to push call buttons several times to get help. I remember the next day wanting to wash up but needing help again. I waited 3 hours for someone to come help me. My doctor came and asked how I was feeling. I say I am feeling neglected, I then explained to him that I was waiting for 3 hours to wash up. He went and talked to the nurses and they still didn't come. Another night after my catheter was removed I waited 15 minutes for someone to come unhook me from all the machines so I could go. I remember my doctor telling me I should stay another night and all I wanted to do was go home where I would not be so neglected. Oh, I almost forgot, I didn't even know that I had 2 incisions until I got home so how well were the nurses really taking care of me. The bandage was removed from the main incision the day after surgery but the other bandage was still on when I got home. I was honestly shocked, I mean I know that I had a port in me but the main incision is so big that I never imagined that they made another incision to get the port out.

I went to my followup visit yesterday. I am hardheaded and got on the scale sometime before my followup and was at 300 pounds. Way heavier then when I went in. My doctor did explain that I was pumped full of air and fluids and this was to be expected. This is why he told me to stay off the scales. At my visit yesterday I was 286. Still a little heavier then when I went in but I am not worried. My doctor has given me the go ahead for soft food. I tried eggs yesterday but they made me very nauseous. Today I tried some other foods and actually threw up a little bit - not food though, just stomach juices. At any rate I am thinking that I was progressed too soon and will be going back to things like mashed potatoes tomorrow. I am having pain in my throat when eating that I wasn't having before. My doctor also gave me the go ahead to eat Thanksgiving dinner. I will be having an extremely small portion of mashed potatoes made in my honor, homemade mac and cheese and turkey. I normally only eat turkey, mac and cheese, rolls anc cranberry sauce. I need to check the sugar on the cranberry sauce but I will definitely not be having any rolls.

My new friend came by Saturday and I told him about my surgery. I didn't get too much into details but just said that I had surgery to help me lose weight. He seemed ok with it but then I didn't hear from him. I reached out to him today and found out that he had a car accident after leaving my home Saturday. I don't know why but I feel bad, like it is my fault or something. Anyway, he is ok, and I am excited to see what becomes of this.

My old friend is on his last leg with me. I don't even know why I am still dealing with him. He was no where to be found right before, during or after my surgery. He didn't call or visit while I was in the hospital. I saw him a few days after I got out of surgery. He came to my house with some Harold's Chicken. I don't know if they have Harold's anywhere but Chicago but that is my all time favorite chicken joint. I was like, how could you come to my house with this? I almost put him out for that. Anyway, I don't really know what I am still doing with him because he is just not there for me when I need him. I will not go into the new year with things as they are right now. This I know for sure.

I am concerned about school right now. I missed quite a bit due to surgery. I went to school Saturday for about 30 minutes to make up 2 tests that I missed. There was a Chemistry test today but I was feeling really ill from the foods that I ate today and didn't go. I don't know what is going to happen with that class. I sent the prof an email but he never responded. I am hoping that he can either excuse me from the test altogether or just let me make it up. I missed most of the lectures for this test though and don't know most of the material. I also missed the deadline for registering for the entrance exam to the nursing school I want to go to. I will have to try again next month.

I have rambled enough so that will be all for now.

It has been just about a week and I am just now able to get on the computer. I will make this short because I am not 100% yet.

Surgery was way more difficult then I could have ever imagined. On the day of surgery I found out that it would be open and not lap. My surgery took longer than expected and there were a few complications. I bled a lot more than expected, there was a hernia that was previously undetected and there were gallstones. The gallstones were not addressed because I was under for too long. I should also add that I had an extremely high heart rate and high blood pressure which seemed to have the nurses very worried. When I woke up in recovery the first thing I remember is fighting with the nurses. After my surgery an egd was done to check everything out. The egd resulted in me hacking up (excuse the graphic nature of this) bloody mucus. So, when I came too in recovery this bloody mucus was in my chest and I needed to cough it up, meanwhile they are trying to force my cpap machine onto me. I am fighting them because I can't cough like I need to to clear my chest with that machine on me. Finally someone with some sense told them to stop trying to put it on me. I went to the surgical intensive care unit and that is where I stayed for the duration of my hospital visit. They eventually downgraded my condition but they never moved me out of the icu. I am sorry to be so graphic but I did not have an especially good experience and I believe in teling the good, bad and ugly. I have a very long incision from my bra line to my belly button 23 staples, and another incision about 4 inches long 5 staples where my port was removed. I had the most awful experiences with the nursing staff at the hospital and I will post more about that when I am feeling better. Each day things are getting better but I have been asking myself, what the hell did I do to myself. I am not sleeping well, can't get comfortable for nothing.

I am so thankful for the members of OH and BAF that called me, sent me messages and came and checked on me. I will thank them all in a public post tomorrow. I am sitting in a really uncomfortable position just trying to journal this as I am thinking it. I left the hospital a little early probably but was feeling so neglected at the hospital that it seemed to be for the best. My doc has advised me to avoid the scale until I see him again which will be next monday. I intend to follow his wishes. I am on the full liquid diet as of right now. I will post later as I feel better.

Ok, so I finished my last day of work a tad bit angry. I was trying to unit test some of my work but I kept running into issues. It was time for me to go. I was working from home so it was just a matter of logging off. I let my boss know of the issues and that I wasn't able to unit test, someone else will have to do it. I told her, I can't stay on late I must log off at 4. She seemed to get an attitude and said that won't help us since you are leaving. Well, damn, lets see, I gave them my whole damn weekend - Saturday and Sunday - for free (salaried, don't get overtime). I should have had the weekend to prepare for my surgery but since they forced overtime today is all I have and they can not have today. Besides getting ready for my surgery I went to visit my great aunt in the hospital. I could write a book about the drama around that. She had hip replacement surgery and is in a lot of pain and her daughter just adds to the drama. Anyway, that took a lot of time because the hospital is way up north. Now, I am getting ready to pack a bag for the hospital, just some things I will need like chapstick, change of clothes for the ride home, and a few books. I should also pack my CPAP machine and my mp3 player. I also have to prepare my son for my being gone. I am making lunches for the next 3 days of school and packing him a bag of clothes for the next few days. There is also some last minute cleaning so that I can return home to a clean apartment. Well, that is a lot to do so I am off to do it. I will post again as a post-op.

I have to make this quick. Tomorrow is my surgery. My hospital finally has everything that they need and I have received my instructions for pre-op, you know - no food or drink after midnight, arrival time and such. Anyway, I am at a very peaceful place. I came to the decision to do this over time and I am confident in my surgeon. I already know that the hospital kind of sucks but I will endure it to have my surgeon. I am going to keep this breif as this is my last day of work for the next 6 weeks and I am trying desparately to complete as much as I can. Ok, maybe I am not trying that hard LOL. Anyway, my great aunt who is 83 just had hip replacement surgery yesterday, another great reason to have my surgery wed instead of yesterday. Anyone reading this please pray for my aunt. She has been in considerable pain and the hospital she was in seem to have some serious issues (can we say malpractice). Fortunately it is not the same hospital I will be in. Anyway the anesthesiologist over medicated her during her surgery and as a result of that they were not able to give her as much pain meds as she needed because she had too much other medicine in her body. I will be going to visit her later today. She is my grandfather's sister and she is very close to my family. We had some drama unfold last week, Thursday regarding her and her daughter but I will post about that later. I had to tell my mother and her daughter to leave her the hell alone because she was preparing for a major surgery and didn't need all that extra stress they were putting on her just days before surgery. She and I had a nice talk Thursday and I could really relate to what she was going through. Anyway, I am hoping that she gets some relief for the pain that she is in real soon. I know that I will be in her position tomorrow with extreme pain but I am not scared, I am more than ready. I am worried for my son because he doesn't take mommy going into the hospital very well. He is already sad and I haven't left yet. I am not a very religious person but I am very spiritual and have a close relationship with God. For this reason I know that his will will be done and I know that he won't take me before my time. I have been listening to some of my favorite gospel songs to put my mind more at ease and it has done the trick. That is all for now, said I would keep this short but I lied. More than likely I will post again later tonight.