ObesityHelp

Hi wls family I know that it has been a long time since I've posted. Just wanted to update you all of my journey. It's going on seven years out for me and I'm struggling every day with old bad habits that I picked back up. However I went to a support group meeting tonight to get some support and help on how to get back on track, and I can say that I forgot how helpful the support meetings really are. I haven't been to a meeting in a long time I mean in a few years. I'm going to be posting new pic's of me soon so that I can see my progress and share with you as well. For the last two years I keep gaining the same 20 lbs I get back on track lose the 20 lbs then go back to my old eating habits and regain the 20 lbs back. I am feed up and I'm tired of being on this roller coaster ride, I'm taking a stand today and I'm going to remind myself every day that in order for me to lose the wt get to my goal wt and stay there I'll have to follow the wls plan of eating for the rest of my life. Tonight Cherish reminded us to get in the 60 grams of protein before eating the carbs, then after eating the protein eat good carbs not the garbage that we can tolerate like candy bars, potato chips, Cheetos Ice cream etc. But vegetables and fruit. She reminded us to make sure we get our liquids in every day 64 oz and try to stay away from caffeine b/c caffeine is a stimulant and it causes you to get hungry faster.  I'm to wait 90 min after eating to drink anything. I just want to share something with you. On Sat January 22, 2011 I pulled out one of my journals and wrote what I was feeling here goes! Wow!! almost seven years since wls come Aug 9Th. I can't believe what I'm dealing with and what I've been through I've gained 20 lbs since April 21, 2005 that was the day my oldest and only son was killed in a car accident and that was the month that I spiraled down hill. I found myself picking up old eating habits, eating late at night like popcorn with lots of butter, potato chips, candy etc. all the time thinking and saying to myself " I know I shouldn't be eating this food I know I should still be following the wls plan in order to continue losing the wt. and in order to get to my goal wt." I crave carbs and end up eating too many "I'm tired of battling with my mind I'm going to take it one day at a time. I'm going to follow through with getting all of my protein in and drinking all of my liquids I'm going to think PROTEIN ,PROTEIN, PROTEIN!!!" I'm getting off this roller coaster ride as of now. I'm not going to gain back the weight that I lost I'm not going backwards I'm going forward with my nutrition bible that Dr. Joyce gave me when I first started this wls journey. Sometimes I wonder and don't understand why wls patients gain some half or all of their weight back. Who am I fooling? I'm in denial b/c I know why I gained weight I STOP FOLLOWING THE WLS EATING PLAN!! I started eating the wrong kind of carbs and found it hard extremely hard to get the 60 grams of protein in. It's wired how I just thought about my son and how much I miss him, the food popped in my head I'm not hungry at all but I'm thinking about  comfort food.