Yesterday I got alot of paperwork done for yet another scholarship app for my daughter. Leo transferred to a new command (he is in the Navy) and I was asked to be an Ombudsman. I was the ombudsman for his prior unit for two years. I am so honored as this command deals with Sailors who are deployed overseas but not as a part of their own unit. That means many families are home dealing with different issues not part of their team.
I was asked to develop an online support group, as well as getting together locally with families. Well hello...that is what we do here!
Today I am not faring as well as I'd like. I am having
issues as a result of adding more iron. In keeping with Ann's eloquent post about Confessions....I woud like to talk about something that is not to be ashamed of. Depression. Although I have been seeing my physicatrist, depression and anxiety have become a major issue for me post op. I have suffered from depression since I was about 14 years old but my Mom was more concerned with my weight and when she would take me to a doctor, I would get diet pills instead of dealing with the underlying issue.God forbid I was fat! At 23 I got married, but my first husband did not believe in medicine. (Good thing he is my ex now) When we separated in 1998, I started taking antidepressants for the situational depression aka the pressures/sadness of divorce.
Fast forward to 2002. I had found and married the man of my dreams, moved to Virginia and when my sailor came home from deployment got pregnant. Wow. I miscarried 8 weeks later. Four weeks after that my Mom passed away, very unexpectedly. Three weeks later, I miscarried again with the twin I has previously lost. (I didn't know I was carrying twins) These events sent me over the edge and I saw 3 differerent phsicatrist's before finding the right one. God Bless this man and the medicines he prescribed. I was on heavy duty meds until I was 4 months post op and was able to come off two of the meds. Now at 10 months out my doctor and I have been trying to find the right balance since absorbtion is now an issue.
I find myself wanting to eat everything bad to comfort my pain. Then I look at all of you here, and am so glad I have such a great group of caring folks. I put the cookie in the trash, take another protein drink and crank up the music to get passed those demons.
I share my story because I am not ashamed of my mental health issues. We share if we are diabetic, or if we have high blood pressure. To those struggling with your own demons I am here for you.