I love sports, and am an avid poker player. I am the father of 1 and am not that upset with my life. Overall my life does not seem that bad but at 400+lbs, it is getting tough to function....
11-26-05
Well I have talked to my Momma about the surgery, she is very supportive, still having problems deciding what surgery I am going to have, ofcourse that depends on what the surgeon recommends as well as what my new insurance Aetna POS will cover. I just read another profile in here and this girl was telling me how she could not wipe her own butt...that was a little depressing...I need to hear some other stories about the real deal and I do not get the feeling that anyone will truly tell me. Well my foot hurts, my knees hurt, and it is truly getting difficult to carry this extra weight, if I wasn't so cute and slightly arrogant, women would have nothing to do with me.... ;)
12-09-05
I am playing the waiting game, my new insurance does not kick in until the beginning of the year...Aetna POS, I have heard that Aetna normally covers the surgery and they told me they would when I called to check but nothing is certain. Even if my insurance does cover it I still have to come up with another $2500 fee for Dr Webb....not very happy about that but what is $2500 in the large scheme of things. Everytime I see a 2x I want to buy it, I am trying to get excited but right now I have been working so much that excitement is relative....I know I am rambling, just kind of in a rambling mood...
12-21-05
Well I just started a new job today in downtown Jacksonville, I know some of ya'll are gonna laugh at me but I now have to walk two blocks to work and found out that I get winded just from doing that. I think I am getting a little depressed with the holidays creeping up and having to change jobs. Ya know I love the reason for the season I just don't like the season...bah humbug...
01-04-06
Well going to call my Doctor today to get a referral to the weight loss surgeon I have chosen, things seem to be coming to fruition, but I must say that I watched the Biggest Loser marathon on New Years Day and felt that I was cheating instead of doing it the old fashioned way but then I thought well if you gave me free room and board, meals and a personal trainer I probably would do that....alas no one has volunteered to bestow me with these gifts.
01-13-06
Ooooooooh it's Friday the thirteenth how exciting....went to the WLS Center in Orange Park to get the ball rolling on my surgery. I think I impressed the lady a little, had my diet info for the past three months and I had emailed a few other of Dr. Webb patients to get some info. I took a blood test so they could see if I had that bacterial antibody from that stomach bacteria that causes ulcers. Dropped of an information request at my PCP to sign the release so I can have surgery and to start drafting my letter....I think I am going to start my own letter today....the kids (these are 3-5 year olds) at my son's school called me fat today...Ya know it only really bothered me because I think it embarrassed him, he was happy to seem me, because he hadn't seen me in about 2 weeks but I asked him today (01-14-05) if it bothered him and he said, "yes...both my parents are fat (not in a joking way)"....oh I found I only gained 8 pounds since last July but on the bad side I think that pushed my BMI up over 60..Dr Webb does not like to operate on people with a BMI > 60.
01-26-06
Well met with Dr Webb today, I only got to see him for about 5 mins, but I was there for about 2 hours....it was a little disappointing. I actually ended up taking the day off because I had to go get an EKG and some blood work for my PCP to clear me for surgery and I was supposed to meet Cathy from LWLSC but I had to cancel it because my visit at Dr Webb’s office took so long. I guess the day was productive but things seem to be moving so slowly.
01-29-06
I was just touring the website today, reading some of the profiles like I am sure whoever is reading this is doing today, I find that I wish more men would share their stories The ratio of women to men who post has to be about 5 to 1, if not worse. I have really only found inspiration from one other person on the sight and he is located in my town go figure that...Since I have made my decision to start this process I have not had any doubts, right now my focus is resolute. There are some things I need to get together though, I need to do a living will..when Dr Webb asked me about that, I think that was the first time that I actually considered that I might die from this surgery..it scared me a little because I don't want my son growing up without a father....I did my psyche eval yesterday, the doctor talked to me for about 30 mins and said I am going to clear you for the surgery, I said cool thanks...
2-7-06
Went to see my pulminologist today, the first thing he said was "Wow, you've gained a hundred pounds since I saw you last"...but all the test he ran showed that I am in better health than when I first came in his office, go figure that one. I went to see my weight loss coordinator for our required preliminary visit, took about 15 minutes, she gave me a binder with some diet instructions and some preop and post op info. They called the hospital since I was off to see if I could get my ultrasound and upper GI done today. I went to the hospital and had the ultrasound and upper GI and then went and had some seafood because I had not eaten all day...I am a litle tired now been a long day
3-5-06
Well I guess I am not frustrated...I mean I have finished everything that has been asked of me and my PCP is bullsh@$$ing and procrastinating...why is it so hard to get people who you pay money to to do their job...you know I should be really upset, my son is moving away, that is breaking my heart, I have been working on getting all the stuff necessary for this surgery and I am met with such affluence from doctor's it's ridiculous...to be honest the pain associated with this surgey cannot be this bad with all this waiting...when I am skinny I am going to give them the finger...sorry for rambling kinda pissy today...I need my medication...
3-28-06
Well lets see....I got all my paperwork submitted finally on the 13th and I gave them a week and have been blowing up Aetna's phones ever since...I found out today that my required info from my doctors got lost, so I was nice about it and called the doctor's office to advise them of this....so now we wait again....this is so much fun I can't stand it.
04-13-06
Well I got my first denial letter...ya know it didn't really bother that much, I just am going with the assumption that it is part of the process, as it is even if I get approved I am not planning on having surgery at this point before May...have I told you guys how much I love Slim Fast? You can get it by the 30 can case at Sam's...just thought I would throw that in.
05-16-06
Well I am losing faith...I received a 2nd denial from Aetna I am not sure if it's even worth it to be honest with you..I am tired of fighting and the Surgeons office does not seem to care one way or the other, they are doing absolutely nothing to help hell I had to call them to tell them I had been denied both times...you would think they would have someone there to follow up with this crap....
09-13-06
As you can see I have not posted in awhile, why you ask? Well mainly because nothing has happened my second appeal was denied by Aetna...bastards...we are now in the process of attempting to complete an external review from a 3rd party abitraitor to garner approval, but I have now put my contingency plan in motion incase the arbitraitor does not rule in my favor. The sad part is the fact that no one in the surgeon's office recommended this course of action, my approval from Aetna is contingent upon me completing a 3 month Surgical Prepatory Regimen....hmmmm lets see we have been trying to get approval since February...that is 7 months ago by my calculations...gee well maybe someone should have suggested this course of action back after the first denial in March....but oh well I guess I'll handle it anyway I guess no news is ok for right now I feel better taking everything into my hands instead of waiting for the doctor and his staff to help me.....
09-19-06
Well I have seen many of these lists on other peoples profiles so I figured I probably should have one too. These are things I hope to be able to accomplish as I lose weight:
1. Not always being the biggest person in the room.
2. Not having people think I’m lazy because I’m fat.
3. Not busting the crotch of my pants.
4. Sweating profusely after walking briskly or for long distances.
6. Being able to wear a seat belt in any vehicle
7. Being taken seriously as I should by others because I’m no longer fat.
8. Not worrying hours in advance if some new environment I’m going to will have chairs big enough for me i.e. movies, restaurant, someone’s home, Dr.’s office, etc.
9. Looking as attractive as I really am.
10. Not letting my internal struggles with my weight keep pulling me away from God
11. Not being inconvenienced by bathroom stalls that are too narrow.
12. Shopping at ANY store I want. You wouldn’t believe how badly I want to shop for clothes at Wal-Mart.
13. Seeing “The President” while standing up.
14. Seeing my feet while standing up.
15. Not being the embarrassing “fat parent” when I go places with my son.
16. Not being the embarrassing “fat bf/husband” when I go places with my gf/wife.
17. Not being the “life of the party” to distract people from my appearance.
18. Riding roller coasters, go-carts, horses, bicycles, and motorcycles.
19. Not having to eat it everything on my plate.
20. A much improved sex life.
21. Not snoring anymore.
22. Having energy.
23. Taking my shirt off at the beach, swimming pool, back yard bbq’s and anywhere else I can think of.
24. Not feeling that I have to purchase things only because they fit
25. Not feeling like I didn’t get a job, promotion, loan, or anything human-decided thing because of how I look.
26. My family, especially my Mom and Dad, not worrying if I’m going to die soon.
27. Not being afraid I’m having a heart attack every time I feel the slightest chest pain.
28. Living life to the fullest.
29. Exercising. I actually miss lifting. I want to become one of those boring runners that make me so sick now. LOL.
30. Buying athletic shoes and clothing.
31. Living longer than the AMA says obese people do.
32. Outliving my parents.
33. Playing with my child and my child's children.
34. And finally, I want to run in an organized race. It doesn’t have to be a 26 mile or even a 10 mile race. I just want to pin a number to my chest and run a race and finish it. This goal is much more important than the number I’ve attached to it.
10-12-06
Well I am still waiting... I am a little down today not sure exactly why. I am a little depressed because my Mom wanted to fly me out for my Dad's 55th birthday next weekend and I told her I couldn't get off work...to be honest sitting on a plane for me really is extremely uncomfortable and anything longer than hour or two in the air makes my legs hurt from not moving and my sides hurt from squeezing into those tiny airplane seats...I feel ashamed I can't even fly out to see my famiy because I'm too fat to fit comfortably in an airplane seat.
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