I apologize I've not been updating my journal. I've been struggling with a lot of issues and stress in my life; I just didn't have the energy to post anything. 
I didn't even start a thread or post on my anniversary date. I wanted too, but just didn't. I've lost almost 140lbs. and I'm happy with that. 

Here's the thing; I'm suffering from depression. I've been put on an antidepressant. What started this depression is a number of things, but suffice to say I was taking a medication that had a side effect of causing depression. *BOOM* I became depressed! 

My stomach is haning down so far on my lap. I'm not really losing a lot of inches in my hip area and this is because of the skin aspect. I'm told I will have to have plastics, but I keep wondering in the back of my head how I'll pay for this. It is constantly causing me sciatica pain, along with back pain, and I had my first rash last week. It's constantly bothering me and makes me feel so heavy. 

I'm still struggling with fatigue. I have had every test done to see why I'm always so tired. I did a sleep study and it came back normal. (good news since I had severe sleep apnea before surgery)
I've had my thyroid checked a few days ago and I've not heard back from my doc, so I'm assuming everything with that was fine too.
My iron is good, blood sugars are good, and there just simply no explanation for this, what I call, debilitating fatigue. 

I did go see and allergist on Friday of this last week and he told me I had several allergies, one being a nasal allergy, He did tell me this could cause the fatigue I"m suffering from and is going to start me on injections. He gave me other medications to work with and I started those yesterday. 

I'm thinking about finding me a chiropractor again and even a natuarlist. I do have an appointment on the 3rd of January with one in Alabama. Mike's mother goes to him and recommended I go too. So, I'm going to give it a try.

As you can see, reading this post, I'm sure you can feel my somber mood. 
It just gets me, because I have not any reason to be so depressed. I'm dong well in school and am even making new friends. 
I just feel so heavy. 

Mike and I were finally able to reinstate our YMCA membership, so I'm optimistic exercising will help with my fatigue as well. It did some in the past, so there you go. 

I am working at letting go of the fact I'll never have a child of my own. I'm not giving up on the fact I'll be a mommy some day though. I have met a lady who adopted 2 children through a foster care program and she told me when I'm ready, she'll help me get set up. So while I can't do anything like that now, it's good to know I can in the future when Mike and I are ready. 

Now for the stuff about the surgery.

My appetite is back with a vengence. I am able to eat most anything without having any barriers to keep me from eating it. Hence, no dumping effects. 
This isn't entirely true however, because last night I tried eating a slice (or two) of pizza and half way through the second slice, it hit me like a ton of bricks!
I've never thrown up after surgery, but last night was the first time I did. I had to lay down and sleep it off. 

I'm feeling motivated to get back on the program, especially now we have our membership back at the Y. 
I'll be doing the South Beach Diet and watching my carbs. 

My weight loss has been nill since I've been off track, but again, I'm optimistic exercising and eating low carb will help. 

I will update again--about 2 weeks to let y'all know.