Well, I just got back from Vegas and now I'm heading back out to Flordia tomorrow.  Amazing how you go from nothing but twiddling your thumbs to can't catch your breathe.  But anyhow, so the plane ride was FAR different from when I was 300 lbs, let me tell ya!  The last time I literally was praying that I wouldn't have to ask for an extension... how horrible that was.  This time, plenty plenty plenty of length.  That was amazing in and of itself.  Then you combine that with the miles and miles of walking I did (literally), and this would have been incomprehensible a year ago. 

It's offical I can't wear any of my rings now.  I was fixing me a drink and my ring just fell off and into my shirt.  So I gotta get those sized at some point.  Don't want to do it prematurely and have to do it again, but I'm thinking in the end I may be wearing a 6.5, which is TINY!!  But we'll see.

I haven't changed a pant size in oh about 45 lbs which has been the death of me.  It's driving me nuts!  I want to hit a size 16 and 200 lbs so badly... the goal is by my birthday.  That would be a wonderful birthday present!  To go from a size 28 to a size 16.  Still got a LONG way to go, probably another 75+ lbs, but I'm getting there.  Those last 75 lbs are going to be the most exciting.  That's what I've been waiting for all these months. 

Well I better run.  I gotta finish packing our bag (still half packed from Vegas, haha), and do a load of laundry before Jason walks in the door.  I love you all!  Hope you're having a wonderful wonderful end of the summer. 

I wanted to add an actual blog since it's been a while.  First let me say plateaus suck, but I finally broke through.  Thank god!  That was rough to see the scale not move for a month, but I didn't obsess and just tried not to think about it.  I only lost 5 lbs last month, and I'm hoping for 12 this month.  If I can lose 10 lbs a month I will be a very happy camper.

I've been wanting to go tot he gym but without having a job money is tight so I just can't afford it right now.  I feel like running (and I hate to run).... such an odd feeling to have I must say.  But I've been trying to do some workouts with weights at home.  Note, if you have Netflix you can watch exercise videos for free!  I've started doing that because I really need to tone up.

Speaking of toning up, I've noticed my arms are starting to bother me... they never have before, but now they do.  Not the point I won’t wear sleeveless shirts, because let's face it I'm still Rachel.  Haha  So I've really been trying to work on that.  Next up are thighs!  I know I have plastic surgery coming up in my future, but I prefer just to do the ole boobs and belly.  I really don't want to have to do anything else if at all possible.

I'm not trying to look like a super model, I just don't want to look like I just lost 200lbs.  The goal has always been and will always be to just be normal.

Speaking of feeling normal... I went to the Braves game with Heath and Jason on Tuesday.  I know I walked 600 yards.  I didn't break a sweat or even have to breathe hard.  It was such an amazing feeling to be able to walk in, sit down, and not worry about anything excpet getting sunburned... which I did.  I feel amazing.  I feel younger than I did when I was 21.  

I still fight the urge to say to myself, "damn how did you let this happen", but it's over now and I must move forward.  

There are many things I would like to change about myself, about my past, about my present, but I love life and it just keeps getting better.  I'm now in a solid 18.  When I wrap my fingers around my wrist they touch, I can cross my legs for a few minutes, I have a lot more room in between me and my steering wheel, I've I'm getting my periods back.  I went years without having one naturally.  But now I've had 2 in 2 months and that, oddly to say, is an amazing thing.  

I still have a long way to go.  At least another year's worth of losing weight and while sometimes that feels like a daunting task, I have to believe it's possible.  It's still not possible for me to imagine myself any smaller than I am right now, because honestly I don't remember being any smaller.  Obviously I was, but not at my full height (yeah a whole whopping 5'1").  I mean common, I was 4’9” and 200 lbs in 6^th grade!  I cannot wait to hit onederland!  I thought losing 100 lbs would be this huge thing, but it was like “ok… next”.  Not that I’m not proud of myself, or happy about the lose, it’s just hard to know you still have more to lose than you’ve already lost.  I’m ready to get past that half way mark.  Speaking of the devil… as of today I hit that… well what a pleasant surprise that is!  Haha

 

 

So according to my calculations I have lost 108 lbs, I’m now sitting at 242 lbs.  108 to go and that will put me at 134 lbs.  Which, like I already said it hard to imagine.   

 

 

Still waiting to get rid of this double chin thing, I just pray I wont have to have some kind of face tuck thing… Also still waiting to see the ‘ole collar bones.  That, honestly, has been the longest waiting game!  But I’ll keep on a truckin.

 

One other little tid bit before I go… I haven’t bitten my nails in a month!!!!  They look so good.  Still need to stop smoking, but having nails is something else I never thought I’d ever have.  According to Freud I have an oral fixation, haha! 

 

 

Well that’s all for this episode.  I’m so proud of you all for all of your accomplishments and I am blessed to have such a wonderful support system with people I wouldn’t trade anything in the world for.  It’s such an awesome thing to be going through this with so many of my loved ones.  Next mini-goal is approaching… weigh less than Jason, and for that I cannot wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

10 lbs.            - 200 lb mark

30 lbs.            - License weight

60 lbs.            - 200 lbs lost!

70 lbs.            - Long time "weight"

75 lbs.            - “Healthy” Category
80 lbs.              - GOAL

Will be so glad when I can see one and lose the other!  LoL  Tried on my 2 pairs of 18s today, and if I don't breathe they fit just fine, lol!  Seriously I hope I can wear them comfortably when we go to Savannah next month.  That's the goal at this point.  Now I have to go buy a pair of 16s so those are my next goal pants!  Woohoo!

One grip and compaint, is this ONE pair of 24s I bought years ago.  I think they were tagged wrong because I STILL can't fit into those damn things.  I have a mind to burn em in protest!!!