things are going good i'm down to 167 from 225 i'm looking better i can't tell a difference in the last 2 months but i've lost like 20 lbs so maybe i will one day. I still think i'm fat lmao i'm in a size 12 i remember telling myself if i get to a 14 iu'll be happy well no i'm not I want to be smaller. I want to get back in to that skirt i wore i the army. Don't know if that will ever happen but thats what I want. I think having 4 kids made my hips much larger hahah. I feel like i'm not that big in the front but i still feel very wide haha. NO complication so far lets hope it keeps up. Ohh yea my hair is starting to fall out yuck

well its been a week exactly since i had surgery i seem to be doing well that first few days was hell truley and then monday i hated that drain tube so bad i cried all day  but its all getting better and friday is right around the corner to get the thing out. i really want some real food all this pudding and jello and shakes makes me sick now. But its all worth it i started a week ago at 219 now i'm already down to 207 wow in a week its crazy.

i forgot to add the date 01/09/08

Well I've been using this site for a month to gather info and now I have a date. So i thought I'd set this up now. So I added what hopefully will be a before pic and can't wait to add a after lol.I'm excited but very scared at the same time. Worried about dieing I know the odds are very low but still you never know and I am scared not for me but for my kids if anything happened to me. I know without the surgery I will be here for them for a long while not happy thou and in pain a lot. But I know that with the surgery i will be setting a great example for them and will be fit and be able to go on walks and play with them now the pain in my knees is so bad i hate to get up and down and  i'll end up like both my parent dead from heart attack stroke and diabetes before i get to see my grandkids. Heck I could get run over tomorrow and be gone right. So I'm doing it before i get bigger and have a higher risk. so thats whats going thru my mind right now. i want to do well and be a sucess story and need all the help i can get for that