HELLO, MY NAME IS RHONII, I'VE BEEN OVER WEIGHT HALF OF MY LIFE, SINCE GIVING CHILDBIRTH TO TWO BEAUTIFUL SONS,  MOST OF MY LIFE HAS BEED IN YO-YO DIETING AND  EXERCIZING UNTIL I COULDN'T  ANYMORE BECAUSE OF LEG PAIN OR BREATHING PROBLEMS , OR BEING TO DARN LAZY FROM WEIGHT GAIN, THEN SLOWLY BUT SURLEY I STARTED AGAIN,  AND AGAIN,  and again,  ever  do that?    GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAM OF BECOMING THINNER ONLY TO BECOME BIGGER AND BIGGER,AND BIGGER ERER!!!!   NO SUCH WORD  OH YES THERE IS!  IT'S HOW I'VE BECOME AND I DON'T LIKE IT ONE BIT.    WHEN I WOULD START GETTING TIRED OF THE WAY I LOOKED  AND FELT  I WOULD GO COLOR OR CUT MY HAIR AND BUY A NEW OUTFIT,  OKAY A NEW WARDROBE;  NOTHING IN MY CLOSET  OF PLENTY , AND I MEAN PLENTY WOULD FIT,  FROM SIZE 12-24  HOW MUCH BIGGER WILL I BECOME BEFORE SAYING....... ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. AND I ...CRYING FOR DAYS BECAUSE I DIDN'T DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, WHEN I WAS IN A SIZE 12.    MY EXCUSES RAN RAMPET,  I HAD YO-YO DIETED SINCE MY TWENTIES, AND IT CAUGHT UP WITH ME.  OH I'D LOSE WEIGHT BUT ON CAME MORE THAN I'D EVER LOST.   SO THE STORY GOES AND GETS BIGGER .     I WENT THROUGH 3 DIVORCES, THREE DEATHS OF LOVE ONES, AND REMARRIAGE, MOVING , GIVING UP MY CAREER TWICE ON ACCOUNT OF MOVING ACROSS THE WEST TO NORTH AND SOUTH OF CA.  WITH AND ,FOR MY NOW HUSBANDS[OF12 YEARS] WORK, AND HAD TO START ALL OVER WITH NEW FRIENDS;  NEW NEIGHBORHOODS, CLIENTS, UNTIL FINALLY I SHUT DOWN ALL COMMUNICATION WITH EVERYONE OUT SIDE OF MY HOME.   i NEVER LEFT THE HOUSE STOPPED GOING TO WORK, SOCIAL EVENTS, CHURCH , GROCERY SHOPPING , MY HUSBAND TOOK OVER THAT JOB FOR ME,  I JUST BECAME ISOLATED FROM THE WORLD.   I DIDN'T THINK...   I WAS DEPRESSED BUT DIDN'T WANT THE WORLD TO SEE ME THE WAY I HAD BECOME;  LAZY, UNDISAPLINED AND FAT!!!!!!   YOU KNOW ;  I WOULDN'T FEEL FAT UNTIL I GOT DRESSED , OR LOOKED AT MY SELF IN THE MIRROR.  I HATED TO DRY OFF AFTER A SHOWER ONLY TO SEE WHAT I HAD LET MYSELF BECOME, YES ME , AND ONLY ME, DID THIS TO MYSELF. THERE'S  NO ONE TO BLAME BUT ME!!!!     MY SECOND SON  WAS DUE TO GET MARRIED, I NEEDED TO LOSE WEIGHT FOR HIS WEDDING, I DIDN'T THINK I'D EVEN BE GOING, BUT I DID;   BROKE ONE OF THE CHAIRS AT THE WEDDING WAS SO EMBARRASED, THOUGHT I WOULD DIE, BUT CAME OUT OF THAT LAUGHING AND MAKING FUN OF MYSELF ,OH OTHERES LAUGHED TOO.  WHAT A FOOL I FELT, THE MOTHER OF THE GROOM , DOWN ON THE GROUND BECAUSE HER CHAIR COLAPS UNDER HER, 296 LBS OF BIG BUTT AND BOOBS, ALL EYES ON ME.......   THAT'S IT, THAT 'S  IT ......THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN ...NO MORE OUTSIDE THINGS UNTIL THIS WEIGHT COMES OFF!   I CALL MY DOCTOR GOT AN APPOINTMENT... TOLD HIM I WAS DEPRESSED AND NEEDED HELP, WITH MY WIGHT, HE SENT A REFERAL AFTER A YEAR ON THE PROZAC, HOPING THAT WOULD MAKE ME HAPPIER TO LOSE WEIGHT AGAIN ...  I GOT A REFERAL FOR THE OPTIONS CLASS IN JANUARY 2006, WAITED SIX MONTHS FOR THE NEXT OPENING FOR CLASS IN JUNE,  I HAVE BEEN LOOKING IN TO THIS SURGERY FOR OVER FIVE YEARS NOW, AND HAD TO HAVE MY MIND MADE UP TO ACTUALLY GO THROUGH WITH IT , THOUGHT ALWAYS THAT I COULD DO IT ON MY OWN, I WAS A SUCCESSFUL PERSON, WITH GOD GIVEN ABILITIES , BUT ON MY OWN I ONLY FAILED, WELL IT WAS TIME FOR PRAYER,....... LORD PLEASE HELP ME TO GET THIS WEIGHT OFF FOR GOOD NEVER TO BE CONTROLED BY YO-YO DIETING AGAIN, AND NO SELF CONTROL, HELP ME  JESUS TO BE ALL THAT YOU'VE MADE ME TO BE ....I CAN'T GO ON ANY MORE LIKE THIS... I DON'T WANT TO HATE MYSELF,  WHEN YOU HAVE MADE ME SO WONDERFULLY MADE,  TAKE ALL THAT  I HAVE AND MAKE ME NEW IN CHRIST,...... GIVE ME A NEW CHANCE IN LIFE, ...RENEW THE STRENGTH IN ME TO GO ON IN THIS JOURNEY OF MY LIFE,.... WITH YOU I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST YOUR SON WHO STRENGTHENS ME. ...     IF IT BE YOUR WILL FOR ME TO HAVE THIS SURGERY LET MY LETTER OF APPROVAL COME TODAY....  I GOT A CALL AND APPROVAL  THE SAME DAY, PRAISE THE LORD,  THEN I WENT TO OPTIONS FOR TWENTYFOUR WEEKS [SIX MOS.] MET THE BEST GROUP OF PEOPLE THERE ...THE TEACHERS WERE GREAT NUTRITIONIST AND THE  RNS WERE GREAT, THE OFFICE STAFF WERE GREAT.. THE DOCTOR, I SAW THERE WAS GREAT..... I BECAME A LIVE AGAIN... MY FOCUS WAS ON BEING WITH PEOPLE NOT MY WEIGHT.... I FELT LIKE A REAL PERSON AGAIN ; WHO I USED TO BE,  BEFORE  I GAVE UP ON EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING, I LOST 17LB AND SIX MONTH FLEW IN NO TIME... .IN THE MEANTIME  I FOUND FRIENDS IN THAT CLASS WHO GENUINELY  SP?   CARED.    ON THE DAY OF THE LAST CLASS, SEVERAL OF US WENT OVER TO THE RIVERSIDE KAISER HOSPITAL AND GOT THE LAPS WE NEEDED TO HAVE COMPLETED BEFORE THEY WOULD TURN  THE REQUEST FOR INSURANCE APPROVAL IN.  ALL TEST WERE DONE THAT SAME DAY OF GRADUATION AND I WAS SO ESTATIC YOU COULDN'T KEEP ME QUIET, DECEMBER 1 ,2006.     I GOT A CALL THAT THEY SENT IN THE REFERRAL OF APPROVAL ON THE 11TH, OF DEC.  MY HUSBANDS AND MINE ANNIVERSARY DAY, THAT WAS A GREAT GIFT FROM THE LORD...ON THE 15TH, A PHONE CALL CAME AND THE LETTER OF APPROVALWAS SITTING IN MY MAIL BOX ALL DAY LONG , THE CALL WAS TO SCHEULDE AN APPOINTMENT FOR DR. SUH ON JANUARY11, 2007, BUKEE[ OFFICE GAL] TOLD ME IF ALL GOES WELL, I CAN HAVE SURGERY IN JANUARY.  LATER   .....MY GIRLFRIEND COMES OVER TO CONGRAULATE ME FOR THE CONSULTATION, AND IT'S AROUND SEVEN SHE'S GOING OUT TO HER CAR AND I REMEMBER THE MAIL... I GO ACROSS THE STREET OPEN MY BOX AND THE LETTER OF APPROVAL IS IN IT.....!!!! PRAISE THE LORD, MY GOD AND SAVIOR!!!! I HAD to CALL AND E-MAIL EVERYONE I COULD, I WAS HAPPY BEYOUND COMPARE....    SO NOW UNTIL THEN I WAIT...., EXCITEDLY FOR MY SURGEONS 1ST. VISIT. .....UNTIL THEN.....MERRY,MERRY,MERRY MERRY,MERRYCHRISTMAS...... AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!!    LOVE RHONII