I'm over one month post op and I hadn't puked untill yesterday. I had been really lucky. I had some sweet onion chips yesterday and they didnt agree. I only had a little but it was enough. Puking wasn't quite like I expected. It was just like a flow of food.
Tomorow I head back to work. I'm excited but also dreading it. So many people will be asking me so many questions and I'm really not in the mood to sit an answer them all.
It looks like I'm up to a total of 33 pounds gone. I still dont feel like I have lost anything. My family says my face looks slimer but every time I look at my reflection all I see is that double chin.
I rule I have learned. Dont eat when upset. Tonight I had a little tiff with the boy and while eatting I ate one bite more then I should of. HOLY CRAP OUCH! Also I dont think my tummy likes corn. I have had it two ways now and both times has been a bit of a challenge to keep it down. I have yet to puke with this new tummy and I really dont want to. I wonder what other people do when they eat a bite too many and end up in a lot of pain. I tried a walk to help and I think it did but really I hurt too much and it was too cold to tell if it was really helping.
Well my three weeks is almost up. I'll be heading back to work on Wed. I'm really scared. What if no one can tell I have lost anything? What if Danielle says "shouldnt you of lost more by now?" I just dont know how well I will handle this. I do need to work on getting all my meds and vitiamins in I'm sucking major at that.
Looks like I'm at 25 pounds gone. I see no physical change in y face or body. I'm going through some roller coaster of rides and I really wish I could call Kymmi but I have no way to reach her.
I'm kinda scared to go back to work. I'm scared they wont see any change in my body either.
Lastnight I swore that I didnt have sugery. I told caleb that I dont feel any different. I haven't had any issues no real pain nothing. Its just like any other day.
I had stopped taking my prozac but started again lastnight as I think that might be part of y head case issues right now. *shrug*
I wrote my my "letter of self" about 4 times... 50 or so if you want to count the times in my head. I guess here I will blather more. I am 31 years old and I look about 25.. on a good day 22. ^_^
I have been plus size my whole life. Even when I was a little kid I always wore sizes bigger then my peers.
I had kids pick on me because I couldn't sit in the seats right at school, I had gym teachers roll their eyes at me because I couldn't run like the other kids and that it would hurt my legs and feet when I tried.
I once had a boy come up to me in the hall and scream in my face how disgusting I was, in front of everyone.
I had guys befriend me just to date my friends who were thinner.
I tried it all from apples to weight watchers. I have tried every type of work out from belly dancing to water arobics.
I don't bother to go shopping with other girls because there is but one or two stores in the mall that has my size. So I spend a lot of time looking at socks and sun glasses. Sometimes not even socks, I mean really do they need to make those extra small too? :::rolls eyes:::
So all in all I think my story to be just about the same as any other girl or boy out there but... well this is my story and thats about all I have to blather about right now.