Halloween, we ain't got no stinkin' candy!

Oct 31, 2011

Before you start thinking I am sort of Halloween Scrooge, I most certainly am not!  My house is deck out as usual - I have had parents tell me they bring friends to MY neighborhood because of my house.  Here is the skinny on the Treats in my house:  Since I moved to the Pacific Northwest, I have striven to NOT give candy, not just because I feel they already have enough, I want to give something fun & memorable.

Thank you to the Ludlums who lived on the next block from the house I grew up in, for EVERY year giving combs & other odd treats!  It inspired me to kick it up a notch, so I start when I see sales on single items like PlayDoh -- yup, the kids ask me at the door, "What are you giving out THIS YEAR?!"  So, I have to give something fun & frivolous.  Halloween is not always a welcome holiday to some, so please don't holler at me for my participation.  It is a silly and fun holiday to me, so I enjoy putting up all my crazy decorations - my boyfriend asked why so many babies this year, "Dunno, just start pulling things out of the boxes & finding places for them to live!"  Yes, I have an odd way of decorating, but no two years are alike, and there are ALWAYS new "boobie traps" that are motion sensor activated.

This year I scored a great big box of glow in the dark spiders, evidently sold at Universal Studios - so they are GREAT SWAG!  I also have individual microwave popcorn (my boyfriend hates when I give popcorn as he thinks its boring), and the grab bag of odd leftovers from years prior -- I did find ONE PlayDoh tub...  Yes, the kids get a bunch of candy, but I am at least glad they get some exercise in the process!

My own daughter would RUN from door to door when she figured out Halloween.  So, yes, I have NO candy, so come on over to my house for the FUN!

Stay Positive!
Brenda : )~

6 comments

Eleven Months and Counting...

Oct 27, 2011

From time to time I do take a little mental vacation from my usual blogginess - ha ha, for lack of a better word!  I am coming up on my one year surgiversary, so all sorts of emotions come into play.  I keep trying to remind myself to get a hold of my surgeon's office, so I can get blood work BEFORE my follow up, but "life" keeps making me bump things from my list of priorities.

For those of you researching surgery or about to get surgery, there are a lot of emotions you will go through after surgery.  Before you worry, they aren't bad, most are quite pleasant, but surgery doesn't make life perfect.  People ask the questions, "Do you regret surgery?" "How do you enjoy life knowing you cannot eat what you used to?"  "Will I lose my hair?"  "What about all that loose skin???"  Trust me, these questions are just easy to answer - but you will have to remember that we all are different, so you will get different answers from different people.

The skin is an inconvenience, one I can totally live with.  It weighs a lot, isn't attractive, but I already knew before surgery that my belly would deflate.  So, which would you rather have, a huge belly that is firm or a deflated one that weighs significantly less?  I choose the later!  If you are like me with a large pannus (the fat apron that hangs over your pubic area) you will learn to dress with the darn thing in mind.  I spent a few bucks on eBay, bought lots of spandex under garments - Slimpressions is a great product if you want a brand to look at - and I use them most days.  I actually have found that non stretch jeans are GREAT for keeping me on task with my portion control!  When you are all compacted, you cannot fit much more into your belly.  I swim five days a week, so my pannus makes me wear a second swimsuit -- as my belly leaks out the legs - it is one of the things I have adapted to.

Hair.  Yes, you will lose some hair, but it also depends on your diet!  I lost some hair around months 6 - 8 I think, but it all came back, and is quite healthy. Daily, I drink one or two meal replacement shakes because my protein goals are higher than many out there - I LOVE Chike if you want a brand to consider.  I get LOTS of protein, took vitamins & supplements before & after surgery, so I have lots of hair.  Oh, and I use non-sulfate shampoo -- Pureology is my favorite - but there are more and more shampoos without sulfates, just have to read the labels.  When your hair starts coming out, try not to wash it too frequently - I swim so I had to.  Also, be gentle when combing & brushing.  It will grow back, so try not to be too worried.

What did I give up after surgery, food wise?  Not too many things, I already had a healthy diet, so quantity is the only thing I would say.  Head hunger is still something I battle daily - especially in bed at night.  Obviously the emotional need to eat does not get cut out when you have surgery -- otherwise we would NOT need support ;)  My cravings for sweets aren't any worse than before surgery, and contrary to my original wishes, I do not dump (insert a firm angry word here).  I am always on top of what I put in my mouth - whether it is water, food, or even caffeine.  Shhhh, I have to tell you a secret... I never was effected by caffeine before surgery, but now, just a small cup of coffee makes me squirrely!  I talked to my general practitioner about it, she told me she was jealous, she no longer got the "rush" from caffeine that I now experience.  Coffee is a vice, so I only have it sparingly.  I am not a soda drinker - so carbonation and artificial sweeteners are a non issue for me.  Water is my drink of choice, always has been.

Going out with friends is not as uncomfortable as some may think it will be.  Many of my friends do NOT know I had surgery.  Yup, I just said it, and it is none of their business just as I do not tell my buddies when I go to my gynecologist!  I eat smaller portions, have been asking for take out boxes for over a year before surgery -- I started to walk the walk a year before surgery, so surgery wasn't a shock to my body.  I will say though, that I think because I was already eating a healthy, low calorie diet, it probably is why I haven't lost as crazy fast as other "heavyweights" who had surgery at BMI's over 50.  It took me YEARS to get that fat, I will have to work for YEARS to get the weight off.  Rome wasn't built in a day, and Brenda is still quite young enough to build her improved body!  Bread is something I miss every once in a while, so I will have a little.  Yup, if you are good at eating slow, you probably can have bread, too.  Oh, another thing that was hard to give up - drinking while I eat!!!  This is something I initially "poo pooed," but truly, the fluid will push the food through and you aren't feeling as full if you just let the food be.  I usually wait 20 minutes or more to have water, so just use your best judgment.

Okay, here is where I tell you that having a positive attitude is paramount to your success!  Yup, I try very hard to look at things in a positive light -- ain't always easy, but it is necessary to me.  When the weight starts coming off you will have NSV - Non Scale Victories - I had one on Monday - I FIT in my bathtub!!!  I still need to mark it off my goal list, so look forward to setting & attaining YOUR goals!  I am able to climb behind the wheel of my truck & have the seat straight up (I believe in good posture) and still be able to see the floor between me & the steering wheel.  Climbing stairs used to make me wince, now I forget things daily & laugh when I happily climb one or two flights of stairs!  The few things I have given up to lose weight are just non issues.  Being able to carry my weight more easily has been the best thing in this last almost year out from surgery.  Would I change anything?  Yup.  Am I regretting anything?  Some.  The main thing is that I am happier now than I have been in years - mostly because getting around is a lot easier for me.  Don't have surgery just to become someone you are not -- do it to improve the someone you already are!

Ask questions before you get surgery.  Get support before and after surgery.  If you think surgery will "cure" fat, it won't, it is just a tool.  Will you be able to play the piano after surgery?  I don't know, did you play it before?  There are NO "last meals," so don't think that way, you are setting yourself up for failure.  Food is fuel - try to remember that - I have to remind MYSELF this, daily!  Will losing weight get you Mr Right or Ms Right?  NO!  But if your attitude is good & your eyes are open, you probably will find that special someone.  Will losing weight make your spouse or significant other leave you?  Maybe.  But, I doubt it is because WE change as we lose weight, not just our body size.  Always be honest with yourself & others, and you will be fine.

Brenda : )~


14 comments

Heading to the Kitchen...

Oct 07, 2011

I am feeling mar-vel-ous!  I got my swimming done early, did a couple errands, then finished writing my reports, so it's ME time.  One of the things about trying to deal with ones obesity is that you have to deal with food.  I am not too pre-occupied with food, but will admit to having unexplained cravings.  What I try to do is, instead of giving in & having what it is I was craving, work on something healthy & so appealing, the fast food or whatever pales in comparison!

Have you ever had the pleasure of eating Aussie Bites?  They are these amazing little mini muffins chock full of good stuff, well, here is my version of Healthy Non-Aussie Bites...

  • 2 cups rolled oats (not quick oats - go look at the bulk food isle, these are CHEAP)
  • 2 cups whole wheat flour - I have even used spelt flour - so if you are gluten free, you know what to use!
  • 1/2 cup UNSWEETENED coconut - again, I LOVE the bulk food isle for this one, too!
  • 1/2 cup sunflower kernels- unsalted are best
  • 3/4 cup Flax Seed - this stuff is amazing!!! Trust me, it tastes great in the muffin, and has added bennies!
  • 1 cup dried fruit - go crazy with this! Cranberry, fig, apricot, golden raisin, cherry - I got blueberries the other day
  • 1/4 cup honey - it does make the flavor, so try not to substitute this one
  • 2/3 cup brown sugar - or brown sugar Splenda - I haven't tried with Agave yet...
  • 1/2 cup of apple sauce & stick of butter - this is lower fat than other recipes I found, and really works!
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 2 tablespoon water

You want to use MINI muffin tins - so this isn't a calorie rich bite - trust me, these puppies are dense & will satisfy ANY craving!  Pre heat oven to 350, then start getting your creative mode!  I like to toast my coconut on a cookie sheet - it does change the flavor, but not a necessary thing to do.  Before you put all the dry ingredients together, set aside the baking powder - we will add it last.  Then after the dry ingredients are happily mixed, in a separate bowl add the honey, brown sugar, apple sauce, and butter - nuke it a LITTLE to get it all warm & happy -- easier to mix.  Don't ask me why, but if you then add the water to the baking soda, you can then mix it into the wet ingredients.  I am sure there is a good reason, but I do not know what it is.  Now comes the hard labor - mix the wet & dry ingredients, and TRY not to taste it!  Spoon into the mini muffin tins - about half full - and bake for ten minutes.  this recipe yields between 45 - 50 muffin bites.  I grease my pans, and they pop right out.  This is a good fiber filled muffin, and I may try adding some unflavored protein powder to it.  I'll let you know if it works!

The last thing I will be making is my pressure cooked beef stew...  Who says you cannot enjoy beef after surgery?  Pressure cooker, baby!!!  My secret is that I have a bay tree in my yard, and (shhhhh), I use Low Sodium V8 in my base!  Oh, and RED onions, it makes a HUGE difference, believe it or not.  If you are REALLY nice, I may share the complete recipe, but damn it, I get so many complements, this one is hard to share!  I work with REALLY lean meat, which is supposed to be a no-no, but if you don't have experience with a pressure cooker - TRY IT!  

If you try the Non-Aussie Bites, let me know how you & your peeps like them!  I love playing in the kitchen, partly because I am cheap (Aussie Bites are expensive in my book), and I can control portion size & ingredients! 

Brenda : )~
9 comments

Brenda-ism Number 296...

Oct 06, 2011

Batwings should be a Badge of Honor -- WE are BEATING OBESITY!  One more battle, let's win this war!

Brenda : )~
10 comments

Reality Never Hurt Anyone, Except those Who Refuse to See It...

Oct 06, 2011

Just to let folks know, Little Miss Positivity has days she wishes she could muster MORE positivity, to pull her out of negative thinking.  Yup, had one of those days today.  Kept questioning myself, "Am I doing all I really could be doing?  Am I just too complacent?  Why do I keep thinking about Taco Bell, and I'm not even hungry?!"  The good news is, two days in a row I had thoughts of "Running to the Border," sadly there are a LOT of those damn restaurants along my daily flight path, I did not succumb to those thoughts. 

Believe it or not, this all got triggered before I went to swim today.  I got an amazing email from someone, and actually felt like maybe I wasn't deserving of such praise.  We all have these kind of days, but what we do to cope, that is how we can tell if we are "all grow'd up".  My mind has a way of going too far off the deep end when I have an hour or more to contemplate (that's why I only swam one mile today).  One of my thoughts was, "Should I go to OA?"  Mainly because I am upset with myself for having a stupid craving.  Okay, thin people have cravings, why aren't they lining up at OA?  What I need to consider is that; yes, I will have cravings - and; no, this doesn't make me a bad person.

Physically, I decided I am no where near as fit as I had been thinking.  This is another thing I was pondering the last two days.  Just as an experiment, I was doing sit ups yesterday.  Stop, I already know, crunches are the better exercise, I was doing sit ups just to gage where I was from my REALLY fit days.  Ten.  Yup, I gave up after ten.  I used to bust out 100 without a flinch, and barely a bead of sweat (total exaggeration, but in my head it made me feel super human).  So, party people, I am going to actually work from the easiest point of exercise, and work to Zumba.  I tell people all the time - I mean this - that if you cannot do something easily, that's okay, just start & build from there.  My plan is easy, Sit and be Fit for a half hour after waking up, then face the world!  See, I am not starting with Zumba, because I know I would not do well at it.  Instead, I will take something I should be able to do easily, master it, then move the NEXT step up.  Skipping steps is easy, but taking each one makes you more aware of the journey.

Thank you to everyone who follows my journey.  Thank you to those who take a few moments to write me.  I will keep my head held high, not too high, and keep telling all who will listen - STAY POSITIVE!  You will have days you don't know how to stay positive, but talk it out.  I took about a half hour, with misty eyes, talking my hiccup out.  It helped me greatly!  I also had a few things pointed out that made me feel a whole lot better.  So, if you are reading this & beating yourself up for not being perfect -- could you take a couple of minutes to focus on all the things you have changed in your life?  It will make you feel better, I promise!!!

Brenda : )~

8 comments

Gloomy Tuesday in Pacifc Northwest...

Oct 04, 2011

Okay, here is where I am standing with regard to getting plastics sooner than later...  I have another consult on November 7, but I am also concerned that I will only be given "one bite at the apple." If I need a revision, I may be outta luck, so that will be a foremost question in the consult. 

Someone asked if I knew how much my pannus weighs, my primary doctor estimated 30 pounds, but since it is still attached to me, this is going to be a wait & see sort of thing. 

I am still paddling away, and have swam 363 miles so far this year.  My back is giving me trouble, so I really need to switch up what I am doing.  Having to wear TWO swim suits (one is a bottom, under my one piece, I wear BACKWARDS) just to hold my flesh inside the swimsuit.  I chose black, as it just looks like part of my suit -- I try for some color matching, come on, I am still a girl!  And for those wondering, YES, I have to wear what I call my "body armour," or "undergarments," you know, latex & spandex, my two bestest friends!!!  The wobble I make just walking sort of cracks me up, but at the same time makes me aware I need some heavy duty help!  I guess I knew this would be an issue, so I am not too bummed at the deflating of my fat.

It's a good thing I LOVE corsets!  Ha ha ha, I haven't tried on my old one that I had custom made, partly out of fear I am still too fat to wear it.  I have some Halloween ideas, and the dress length corset, will look fabulous!  It is ivory brocade, has a sweetheart neckline, and goes almost to my knees -- sexy!  Someone actually posted on my Facebook page a photo of me wearing it -- ironically, I bought it for my birthday, oh so many years ago!!!  If it fits, I promise to post photos.

I did something I thought was kind of fearless at my Support Group Meeting, I shared my nude before photos -- and my one month post op - to show where I have been.  I need to update them, as I only have three months worth of nude comparisons.  The photos were printed to show the plastic surgeon, and I still had them in my purse on Saturday -- just imagine if a stranger got a hold of them - YOINKS!  Like you never saw a REALLY fat chick before?  I also had some cheesecake shots -- yup, even close to 500 pounds I poised on the beach, sans clothing, on Maui... Imagine how I would get out of the indecency ticket if a cop ever saw me?!  Maybe I share a little too much?

Things are cold up here in the Pacific Northwest.  I actually gave up & washed my truck, including a good vacuuming!  If it rains, I don't care, I could not stand the dirt living on my pretty truck.  It's good exercise, and frankly, I like driving in a pretty truck!  Staying busy, that's me!  Get out there - even if it is cold - and get MOVING!  I did gardening yesterday, will do some more today, and I swam before I washed my truck -- what did YOU do physically, today?!

Stay positive!!!
Brenda : )~
4 comments

About Me
38.8
BMI
RNY
Surgery
11/16/2010
Surgery Date
Mar 16, 2010
Member Since

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