I really do love to eat, so back to Weight Watchers I went.  I really enjoy the support at the meetings.  I eat a lot 3 years out, this program keeps me in line.

This paragraph is really just for me, I already KNOW the answers. I am up 25 lbs with no end in sight.  Walking all over NYC two weeks ago  where we walked up to 8 miles a day didnt even budge my weight.  I am grazing and snacking, while my co-workers  are doing well and losing weight.  I honesty think that is why I am on this downward spiral.  You know with some people, you tell them good news and it depresses them?   I think that is me.  My work clothes dont fit but my eating is out of control.  Trouble is I am the only one who can control it, and I am not. 

Didnt Charlie Brown always use to say that?  Well, here I am, 2.5 years out and up 21 lbs.  To be fair, I need to lose 18, but it seems monumentous and I feel out of control.  I am beseiged by carbs, chips, oh yes, I ck for a low carb content before I buy them, but I am not supposed to buy them!
What I am changing?  Adding more excercise.  Back to two shakes a day.  trying to get more water in. 

I dont want to be one of those who our friends said, "yah, she lost a lot of weight but gained it all back."
No way.

Yes, I feel doomed!

I want to thank you for your responses to my blog about failing and Weight watchers.  You were so kind and so supportive, I was overwhelmed.  I am taking your advice.  I quit WW this morning, began the day with water and protein, I will also get my walking in today.  I dont know what I was thinking joining WW, spending all that money per month plus adding processed foods and carbs into my life!  I have my head on better this morning.  I had a great breakfast full of protein, already have a great start on my water and vites, in my head I feel better already.  I am using my fitbit to track my 10,000 steps a day plus tracks my food intake.  I feel very  impowered!  Next step, go back to my support group on Wed nights.  I have to drive far to get there, but it will be worth it! Thanks again!

Well, I went to Weight Watchers and it has introduced me to many things I should not have begun to eat.  Popcorn, low carb breads and chips, sugar free candy and instead of losing, I have eaten myself up to 132 or so from my low low of 117.  My actual normal weight should be about 125.  I am in that space of knowing what I should be doing but not doing it.  If not for walking on the treadmill every day, I would be up even more.  My head is not in the right place.  How could I do this to myself?  I am not sure how to set myself straight.
I know the drill, water, protein and excercise.  If you were new I would be telling you that.