I got down to 181.  I was so excited.  Two lbs. would put me at an even 80 total lost.  Then, I got on the scales on Thrusday and I was up to 184.5.  I was so mad.  I couldn't believe it.  I ate perfectly and did my 2 miles every day.  BAM!  3.5 gained just like that.  I thought it would go away quickly.  I weighed on Monday morning.  Nope, still there. I do fluctuate by a pound or to, but 3.5.  AAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!  It's sooooo frustrating.  How can you gain weight when you only net about 800 calories a day?  It's just not logical.  But when I really think about it, my weight was never logical anyway.  So now I have to re-lose those 3.5.  It's unmotivating too.  I start thinking, what's the use.  I'll just eat what I want and quit exercising.  But I catch myself because that is the defeatist attitude I used to have.  I have to remember that this takes time and one setback does not equal total failure.  So I am taking deep breaths and staying off the scales until Friday. 

I am getting lots of compliments the days. I'm getting called skinny and skinnie minnie.  I am being told I look great.    Someone actually called me beautiful.  There are lots of comments about me melting away, getting thin and wasting away.  Everyone is always asking how much weight I've lost.  I have also been accused of letting it go to my head and thinking I was a hottie.  (I didn't think there were 43 year old hotties...haha)  Before I lost weight, I always gracefully accepted any compliment.  However, these days I find it hard.  I still feel like the same old me.  I don't want the attention or the conversation to focus on me.  I get embarrassed and it puts me on edge.  Then there is always, if you loose anymore there will not be anything left.  I just want to yell, "People, I weight 183 lbs and I am 5'2"  I'm still square.  I need to loose 40 more lbs and find some curves.  I am a long way from my goal.  "  I know everone means well and I am thankful for friends who notice my changes.  But, being in the limelight is unfamiliar territory and I wish the novelty would wear off.  I actually expend extra energy in trying not to get noticed.  Who knew this would ever be a problem?