ObesityHelp

It has almost been 2 years.  I fluxuate between 147 and 152 down from 284.  Sometimes I'm a 4 sometimes almost and 8.  I worrie cause I can eat almost anything.  Not always alot but I can snack on almost anything.  I hate by sense of smell and taste for the most part has returned.  I still don't do well with pork espically the red BBQ sauce on pork.  Milk or heavy creams I must watch also.  I do have low sugar issues now.  I don't follow the rules like I should hence some weight gain.  I love shopping though I hate my saggy boobs and flappy wrinkled arms and sharpe' puppy looking ass!!  Oh well I'd rather sport that than all the fat.  I suppose it will always be something but I am so lucky I have had no real serious issues like some have had.  I would do it all again and sooner if I had known.  I need to get back on track and stop with this junk stuff.  Most is just habit of board dume cause I can go all weekend without eating when I get out in the yard.  But my night time habits are wanting to come back to life!  I must stop!!!!

Well today I am down 101 pounds.  YaHoo!!!!  Yep I am skin and bones and saggy skin but it is so nice to be able to breath.  TIme goes by fast.  I just lost my first 18 year old Beautiful niece last week to a motorcylce accident.  So sad, such a Beautiful woman inside and out.  Her parents did a great job and were so blessed though it isn't fare the pain they are carrying.
I haven't really had any health issues though I never did get my energy burst alot have, guess I won't.  I don't always follow the rules but I am trying to now.  It is very easy to get back into those habits after the nerves heal and the taste comes back Yep!  I do look much older now.  Oh well it's a trade off.  Wish I had good credit I'd get those wrinkles fixed!  On ward its only a year now and there are still more things to hurdle and work on but I will survive!!  People still can't believe how I look and yes sometimes they think I have been sick.  This week I do look sick cause of the stress and sleepness that comes with death.  I am just out done with this one.

So I haven't posted in a long time.  Life has been good sorta, frustrating and boring to a sense.  Time goes by fast but it felt like the weight didn't go fast enough.  On my day of surgery I was at 251 and today I am at 211.  Ok I know 40 pounds is good espically since I was 284 at my first consiltation.  I exercised and did the diet that I will be on after I go through all my stages.   I haven't really done the exercises now since I left one job location and transfered to my home town because of new orientation fees and such I went out of town for a few days home for awhile than surgery.  I know I could of used a tread mill.  I did start walking but stopped a few weeks back.  It has been so hot.  Any ways about 3 weeks out I platoed.  Than I was also at a no lose for the last 3 weeks.  THan Saturday I weighed and I had dropped 3 pounds and this morning another 2.  Finally.  It's hard to believe we don't loose more than we do with the amount of calories we eat.
Well protein is a hard to do problem.  I don't like protein drinks.  Muscle shakes are too sweet and give me a headache or make me feel like I could puke.  Powder drinks are gritty and just plain gross.  Naturual meats, well somedays they work and somedays it just isn't good or it hurts.  You never know for sure..Now fruits I love and have no problem with.  Pretzels or pita baked chips no problem.
Clothing is a problem.  Despite my no scale movement I was losing inches.  I have gone from a 22 and some 24 to a 16 or small 18.  And large or medium shirts, depending on how they are cut.  I can see little tiny rinkels on my inner thighs , under my arms and the top of my breast when they are lifted up where they are suppose to be.  They say slower weight loss is better for the skin but we shall see.
I love being able to buy clothes that aren't in the fluffy womans section.  But I hate spending the money if I won't be in them long.  I still sometimes worry that I may see that size again.  If I do this right I know I wont but I still worry.
Well I am writing for a local paper about my weight loss journey though I am two months out now.  I look back at my first journel entries and I see how bad the spelling was.  I actually was really concerned about it and they way my brain was so confussed and my sleep habits.  But that has all straighten out now I think, LOL.
I still come home pretty tired and I don't feel like and usually don't cook.  I know my husband doesn't like it much though he doesn't say much about it.  I think he thinks I should be all pass this tired stuff but I really am not.  Some days I would love to sleep my life away.  My mom and sisters are ok about my surgery now and relize it isn't as bad for me as they thought.  My middle sister just started chemo for stage 4 cancer so they really don't have time to even think about me and thats ok cause cancer is a serious thing.  
Well hopefully I will be under 200 at my Sept 5 appointment.  I sure hope my weight loss picks up.  I guess I need to start exerciseing.  Don't get me wrong I am not sitting all day doing nothing.  I work 8 hours a day on my feet in a bank and for the last month I have spent weekends except today working hard in my yard landscapping moving bushes and finally getting things planted that I had let go cause I was just to fat.  Well tomorrow is another day and I must get to writing my artical.

Ya know when I think about it and all the comments how it's like we are reborn, it really is.  If you have kids remember first thing was if they went to formula how their little bellies might colic and only rocking, movement or a car ride made it better and they would cry from the pain.  It was new food for their little stomaches to adjust to.  Than about 4 months or so they start losing their hair on the back of their little heads and everyone that didn't know, thought you left them in the carrier seat to long!!!  But it grew in long and curlie most times even for the boys.  Heaven knows I hope we don't cut new teeth, HeHeHe...might be ok for some.   Sleeping issues is the same, getting use to new sleeping positions till the stomach pain is controlled I assume is the same.  Learning new foods will be the same.  Good at first and maybe nasty later.  The stages we eat certain foods in our diets is the same.  Learning to walk.  At first I felt like crawling and rolling to my side was very hard.  I am practicing standing straight walking.  I know I screamed like a new baby when I came to from surgery and probably for a while.  We shall consider a catherter a painfull diaper.  I hope I don't have to wait another 13 years to grow perkie boobs, is that an option I wonder.   Anyone 13 years Out..LOL?  Yes I honestly believe this is like a rebirth.  I hope I get it right this time!!! Lynn url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wgX259b/] [img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/t/wgX259b/weight.png[/img] [/url]

Donna F. Thomasville, NC Adolfo Fernandez RNY (07/10/07) Member Since: 10/13/06 [Latest Posts]

Post Date: 6/10/07 5:45 am You are too funny!!!!   But everything you said is true!  I haven't had my surgery yet -- still got 4 weeks to go but I am so excited for my "rebirth" and in fact, I have already thought about some milestone rewards for myself.  Since July's birthstone is Ruby, I have decided that after I loose my first 50 lbs, I am going to buy myself a necklace and earring set that I've had my eye on for a while.  It is 2 little cherries with stems and the cherries are rubys and the leaves on the stems are diamonds.  It's so pretty!!!  Then when I reach the 100 lb lost mark, I am going to get a diamond and ruby bracelet so that everytime I see it, I will remember what my journey has been all about and that my new life began with my "rebirth" on July 10, 2007.   Thank you for sharing!!   Hugs, Donna The most important things in life aren't things. . .

zlynnc NC John Pender RNY (06/06/07) Member Since: 05/17/07 [Latest Posts]

Post Date: 6/10/07 10:53 am Donna, What a great Idea on the jewelry.  I'll have to explain that one to my hubby.  Right now he doesn't know what to take as serious or not in conversations.  He ask's if I took my pain meds.  He thinks I do more than I let on but I am seriously trying to cut it off.  I due feel like shit sometimes but  I just walk.  I have never liked how any drug makes me feel out of control or not able to function.  It freaks me out.  Guess thats why I would never make a good druggie.   Now my Human BIrthday is July 9th and my hubby is the 10th and one daughters the 5th.  So you are going to be reborn on my Husbands.  I wonder what Junes birthstone is.  What a good idea...Hmmmm might be the start of a bad addiction..buying jewelry.  Lets call it an investment in fine gems. Well today was lets see since Wednesday....4th day out and I had my first BM..My husband thought I was nuts when I shared that.  It was just like baby's first bm on formula.  I couldn't get enough toliet paper..LOL.  And it felt so good LOL..Remember how those cute little babies smiled after they filled their diapers.  Yep its true. I no one thing I have figured out about  babies and car rides,  its not about needing to go to sleep its about getting out.  I am about stir crazy from being house bound and I am so tempted to take the car and go.   I heard the other ladies on the Tenn board talking about the Starbucks Achieve frapachino coffee protein drinks  and how good they were so I researched them and they are suppose to carry them at walmart.  Walmart is calling!!! I also need to get more crystal light on the go vitamin mixes.  I love the Cherry Pomegranite.  It taste like cherry popsicles.  I had one in a slurpee form from 711 in Albeq. NM last month and it was to bitter.  The little packets are best. The strawberry blast has vitamin B in them for energy.  Well onto more little baby steps!!