A Disheartening, but Enlightening Day

Feb 01, 2017

Well today was Day 3 of my abstinence, and to be honest, I know God had to intercede today because this day sucked. I had a rough time at work and I was unable to get the kind of work done that will actually help me to graduate and that was extremely frustrating. I tried to call my sponsor because I was very tempted to fall off the wagon and she completely shut me out and told me that I was calling her too much. I thought that was one of the purposes of having a sponsor... It's supposed to be someone who you call before you screw up no? She also went on to tell me that she typically only talks to people once a week. Ummmm you do realize that this is only Day 3 on program for me right? I'm not even an OA infant... I'm like a fetus at this point! SO needless to say she is no longer my sponsor, and unfortunately her response to me made me extremely emotional, and that just pissed me off even more. But God is real and he never left my side.

I am so proud to say that in the face of all of today's stress I did not binge, I did not fall off the wagon, I did not quit. Even though I was shattered, it was a temporary feeling that I got over by talking and praying over, not eating. This was truly a triumphant day. Was it perfect? No. But I am glad that it happened because I now know what I don't need in a sponsor and I also learned that God always has my back. So I am grateful, and I am still standing. Amen.

The Serenity Prayer

God give me the strength to accept the things I cannot change.

The courage to change the things that I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

Amen

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