More thoughts about this journey........hmmmm

Jan 12, 2013

Am still not even a little bit sorry that I took this journey, every day I see more changes in myself and not all good, I find I don't have the patience I once had , I'm less tolerant of people, I don't like it, I have to really work on it, I notice what other people eat and it amazes me the volume of food they eat, This is not me, really where is all this coming from? I don't voice it but its a good thing no one can read my thoughts. what am I going to do? I don't want to be like this, it was not that long ago that I was there, and I remember how hard it was, so why cant I  see that, I have no right to feel better than anyone, I was fortunate to be able to have this surgery, and I know not everyone can, please tell me this is just another thing I need to work through, I didn't realize how much of myself was defined by  my weight and now I don't even know who I am, just when I'm starting to reconize my reflection, I don't know who I am inside, I hope I'm not the only one who has went through this, and I hope it gets better, maybe if I choose to see positives it will begin to come back to me, I refuse to be " that skinny bit** "I remember people like that and I refuse to be one of them.

I guess I'm still a work in progress, but I wont give up in my quest to reclaim my life... I will be whole again someday!.

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