4 years, 5 months out ... can it really be?

Mar 01, 2010

I find it amazing that my journey through WLS began 5 years ago ... after a lifetime of weight struggle.  And that journey continues ... it will never be over.  After 2 1/2 years of remaining at a very stable 135 lbs, over the last 2 years 20 lbs have crept back into the picture. I can only look in the mirror and ask the lady looking back the question ... why?  Carelessness ... lack of commitment. All the things on the check list that we were suppose to watch for.  Life ... I think life getting in the way is a lot of it .. though, wasn't it life that got me 100 lbs overweight?  That was my excuse.  Funny ... those headbattles never DO go away. Death of my mommy, divorce, changing jobs, losing a job due to the economy, being on unemployment for 9 months just as credit card interest rates skyrocketed ... credit issues mounting ... a new job that pays 65% of what the last one did ... fear ... uncertain relationships ... LIFE> it doesn't change because we have weight loss surgery. 

So as my dear mommy used to say ... I've just got to pull up my big girl panties and deal with it! Deal with finances, weight gain, relationships .... LIFE ...  PAY ATTENTION!

The thing is ... life is good in many respects and I am absolutely grateful for all the good things in my life ... and at the same time terrifying as I have serious issues to deal with and no one to really turn to ... being a single orphan has it's disadvantages ... 

And so it goes ... today is the first day of the rest .... guess it's time to make a difference ...

love to you all!

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