Negativity

Aug 16, 2012

I totally hate negativity.  I try so hard to not be negative, I have been trying to surround myself with only positive people, and literally RUN for negativity.  I have been shown over and over and over again that if you stay positive things usually work out.  I usually don't mention religion or politics....simply because they are such touchy topics and I would never want to offend anyone but I honestly believe that God always provides a way to those who truly seek it.  I have been totally down and out and thought that I was ready to give up and something always happens to give me a "way"out of the bad/negative situation.  Whether it is a financial situation, a situation with my weight, with relationships/friendships, whatever it might be a "way" always seems to be provided if I just take the time and determination to look.  With that being said I also believe that negativity is always lurking right around the corner and I believe that misery does love company.  
So while I don't have a scale at my house right now (lost it in the move) I can tell that I have lost a little more weight. My clothes fit looser, I have on a size medium shirt on right now which I never thought would happen so I can tell that things are still moving in the right direction.  I went and got a new hair cut yesterday....super short for me as I usually keep my hair below my shoulders, but as a new mom (again) I simply don't have the time, so I am embracing change and cut it all off LOL.  Then negativity reared its ugly head in the form of a not so nice comment....someone tells me "you use to be cute and sexy BEFORE you lost all that weight"!!!!!!!!!!  WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!  Sometimes it is best to keep what you are thinking to YOURSELF!!!!!  That should have been done in this situation.  OK, every one has a right to their opinion but does that mean that you can just allow garbage to fly out of your mouth anytime you want? I don't think so (and maybe I am wrong).  I don't like everything about every body that I see every single day but I don't go up to them and tell them my thoughts/opinions.  I don't even do that to my closest friends.  If I don't like something that is my problem not theirs, now I will tell my good friends my opinion on things but never in a blunt harsh manner.  Maybe it isn't necessairly WHAT you say but more HOW you say it.  

I think that the TRUE reason/meaning for most of us who have had WLS is lost.  Yes I wanted to be smaller, yes I wanted to be able to shop in the regular clothing section and not the plus size section, yes I wanted to be noticed more, yes I wanted to "fit in" to what society has made acceptable, BUT most importantly I wanted to be healthy.  I hated walking up a small flight of stairs and being completely out of breath and sweating like I had just ran a mile.  I hated hearing that my blood pressure was somewhat high, I hated seeing the diabeties commercials or having to sit and listen to my doctor lecture me about all the things that could happen if I didn't lose the weight, I hated not being able to go out and play with my son.  I remember sitting in the initial information seminar for WLS at the hospital and the surgeon came out and gave his speech and showed all the statistics, and then he flashed a photo of a very overweight man, it was the mans "before" photo.  The next slide showed the same man after surgery a few years out and he had lost a TON of weight, he didn't have a shirt on and you could see the loose skin and I remember one lady making a noise and a comment about how bad he looked.  The doctor then said that he didn't care HOW the man looked what he cared about was the fact that he had lost over 100 pounds, and that he was off ALL his medications, his blood pressure was in normal range, he was working out 2-3 times a week, eating healthy, and enjoying life for the first time in his life.  I have to sit and think back to that moment a lot myself because I too get caught up in the "image".  I want cosmetic plastic surgery but I have to remind myself that the TRUE reason for going through this process was to get my life back.  To be HEALTHIER more than anything.  So when I hear a comment like "you was cute and sexy before you lost weight" I think-while that may be true, I also was closer to an earlier death and there is nothing cute or sexy about that.

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About Me
FL
Location
29.0
BMI
RNY
Surgery
11/29/2010
Surgery Date
Oct 01, 2010
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