Dec 20, 2012
Is it really almost Christmas already?? LOL my how the time does fly. I have been MIA for a while, with moving, new job, new baby, trying to get back into some type of routine....which is still a work in progress time has literally gotten away from me. It dawned on me a few weeks ago that I completely missed my TWO year surgiversary....not sure how that happened. Two years, I can still remember my first informational meeting and how anxious and nervous I was that my insurance wouldn't approve me. And now two whole years have went by and so much has changed!!
What have I learned? Well I learned that I deserve to be happy, I learned that taking care of myself is the #1 goal, and I learned that being alone (single) isn't all that bad after all. I do have two amazing boys who keep me super busy so I am never really alone. I have learned that I have to love myself first. AND most importantly I have learned that at no point in time will I ever be perfect.....and you know what??? Thats ok! I wasn't born perfect, I don't know anybody that was. I ballooned up to 301 pounds....that is no where near "perfect" in most peoples eyes. And then now to step on the scale and it says between 155-160 I still don't feel "perfect" but I am satisfied. Some people look at me and say I have lost too much weight, some look at me and say I could lose 20-30 more pounds. But what really matters is that I am healthy, and I am ok with my weight. Are there things that I would like to change or fix? HECK yes! I despise my stomach and my sagging chest LOL, I also miss my behind....this chair gets harder and harder everyday! But at this point in my life I don't want to undergo any more surgeries, and I can't financially afford to go have plastic surgery and the things that I dislike are not hurting me health wise so why worry about it? Self acceptance is huge in my life now. I have focused on other things, I have a nice new hair cut that I am trying to keep up with. I found this super awesome new curly hair product (if you have curly hair...you gotta try Miss Jessie's Quick Curls) that works wonders. I have changed my wardrobe up a little bit. All positive steps.
I am also happy with my routine. I wake up every morning which is a blessing in itself, I am able to get my kids ready for the day, I feel that they are safe while I am working, and in the evening I am able to cook and just be a mom. I have heard horror stories about individuals gaining so much weight back after having WLS, and I pray that doesn't happen to me. At two years out I can say that while I do still have some tummy issues I am happy with my decision. It has completely changed my entire life. I do still have things to work on....like my diet. I have found that I snack more...sweets, cookies, cakes, things that I already know I shouldn't have....and the other day I ate an entire 6" sub from Subway...minus the top bread....who even knew that was possible??!?!?!?!?! I sure didn't. And I don't plan on doing it again even through I didn't feel any pain or discomfort I just personally feel like it was too much at one time. I also want to start adding a better vitamin and a protein shake into my daily routine somewhere. Maybe a shake for an on the go breakfast or something.
I am more social, I will talk to people, engage in conversations. I can't say that I have really made a ton of friends here but I have made work associates, made some business contacts, and I am more outgoing and communicate with the clients better. So basically what am I trying to say? LOL, well I am thankful for another Christmas and Holiday Season. I am thankful to be able to come here and write about it. I am thankful for the progress and the journey and consider it a life changing learning experience. And I look forward to 2013 and hearing more and more success stories, and being more active on the site and continuing the journey!