More on dad. just a little wee vent.

Mar 21, 2017

I am going through with the surgery. i asked my father and mother if they were ok with it. the reason i blog this is that i feel like i am never going to get through to them, especailly my mother, that i am a grown person able to handle stress and dire news. 

my father flatlined last week. that was why my sister was so down on my surgery and my relatives were all cross with me because i was not understanding my mothers extreme stress.

don't get me wrong he was reccessetated and he is back in ccu now. he is better than anyone thought he would be. but he is still stressfull. i was so upset about my mothers depression and anxiety i took a cab from work on friday to my mums house and cried the whole way to her place. i was so worreid and convinced i would have to cancel my surgery. i was so dissapointed. 

but she said nothing was wrong she was just having a blue day. i belived her until that night when my sister said casually "well after dad died..." and my jaw hit the floor. 

my mom told everyoen there that she forgot to tell me in teh head of the moment. 

but later told me she didnt want me to give up work for this. i was like 'this' is more important than work. 

anyway. just needed to get it off my chest. 

6days 

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