6 months out!!

Mar 20, 2012

 I am down a total of 104 pounds and a BMI of 42 now!!  Am doing so many activities now that I haven't done in years and trying some I've never done. Still have about 86 pounds to go to get to my first goal weight of 180 then I will decide where to go from there.  The energy and feeling of being so mobile with no back pain anymore is amazing!  I hate the sagging extra skin and will need some plastic surgery eventually for sure to remove it.  All is well for now though, will cross that bridge when I get to it!!  

Now for the stressful stuff!!! My husband I believe is going through a midlife crisis. He decided about 4 months ago that he isn't in love with me anymore and really doesn't think he wants to be married either. No longer feels happy but doesn't know why. just thinks getting out of life with me will be the answer. Our marriage wasn't perfect but I never saw this coming. Up until that point he always told me he loved me and would see other couples going through this and say he was so glad we both believe marriage is forever and divorce is only an option if there is infidelity or abuse.  There is no other woman. He just claims to be confused and unhappy and does not believe counseling will help at all.  It blows me away that he is just ready to throw 20 years of marriage and a 22 year relationship down the drain without a fight or at least seeing if counseling could help.  Very devastating for me and our kids who are having a hard time understanding why he would do this to our family.  He had the sleeve surgery a little over a year ago himself and has since changed so much physically that I don't know if he's having such a hard time identifying with who he was and just wants to shed every memory of his former life and move on to a totally new life. I do not know what to think. I know this surgery sometimes does that to a person but I had such grand dreams of how life would be once the two of us had this done and were on our way to being healthier happier people together. I thought we'd be an unstoppable force.  I still have hopes of working things out but feel I am the only one with some hope.  Time will tell I suppose.

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