Question:
Has anyone struggled with what I'm struggling with?
— Danielle P. (posted on January 24, 2007)
January 24, 2007
HI DANIELLE ! WE ALL WERE PROB IN UR SHOE @ ONE TIME OR ANOTHER OR WE WOULD
NOT BE HERE.
I AM 2DAY 7 DAYS POST OP (RNY GB)! I HAVE NEVER ANY REGRETS!
U HAVE TO MAKE THE RT DECISION 4 U & REMBER THAT ITS ABOUT CONTROL
& HEALTHY LIVING NOT WHAT ANY INE ELSE THINKS!
GOOD LUCK!
— CELESTIALDIVA01
January 24, 2007
Danielle only you can decide if and when that you need the surgery, but if
you have given it great thought I would say go for it. Don't wait to have
other serious medical problems due to obesity. I waited too long and have
severe arthritis, diabetes and diabetic peripheral neuropathy, high blood
pressure and high chlesterol.
So not only do I have to put in seious effort to clear up my weight problem
I also have to live with all the side effects of these other problems.
Maybe if I would have gotten the surgery sooner I would be in better shape
quicker. I had the lapband done on Dec. 4th of 2006.
Best of luck with whatever you decide.
Dan
— bigdooba
January 24, 2007
Hello Danielle,
I know it's a struggle with weight and the stuff you hear from family
and friends, but just remember this is something that has to come from
you. I did over 4 years of research before I made up my mind. I just
finished my paperwork and talked to the coordinator and surgeon. I am
also waiting to see if me insurance will cover the lap-band. I have a
BMI of 48. This has got to be your decision. If you need to ask
questions, this is the place. There are a lot of great people on this
site that have been through many different types of WLS.
The best of luck to you no matter what the decision is you make
Sherri
— Sher N.
January 24, 2007
Hello Danielle..The fact that you question your decision is a smart thing.
Only you understand what it feels like to be called names.But remember
this...it's not what they call you, it's what You answer to! Take a look at
yourself in the mirror. If you indeed want to change that image..look at
your options. WLS is one of those options. I had Lap RNY on November 6th,
06. I am happier than I've been in years. I have lost 43 pounds thus far.
Could I have done it without the surgery? The answer is NO! As for
personality..I wasn't the sweetest person on the planet(that's just me..so
I thought). But I'm now nicer to others than I was prior to surgery.I
honestly contribute my niceness to the fact that I'm happier with myself as
a person and also feeling more confident when I look in the mirror.Somewhat
sad but true is the fact that now I get "full" off of compliments
instead of food.Being that you're confident at your present weight,if you
were to opt for surgery, that confidence would surely increase.You would no
longer have to "compensate" for being overweight. Just
think...there would be "less" of you...a happier/healthier You
and still Funny too! Best of luck to you.
— purnellj
January 24, 2007
Hi Danielle! Hey, I know exactly what you're going through. I made my
decision finally when I had to be put on blood pressure meds and couldn't
go up and down the stairs to follow my 3-year-old around without getting
winded. Only you can make the decision-- I only wish I would've done it
sooner! Originally I was going to get the lapband but after some research
and seminars realized that sweets and fats were my weakness and I needed
something more to persuade me to change my lifestyle so I opted for RNY. I
had my surgery on Dec 27, 2006. I am 4 weeks post op today and have lost 28
lbs already. My blood pressure was halved 2 weeks ago and next week I go
off it. The best part about surgery is that I no longer FEEL hungry. That's
not to say I don't have "mental" hunger, but that is slowly going
away too. Best of luck to you!! Aaryn :)
— airbear762000
January 24, 2007
Hi Danielle!
I, like you had the same reservations and questions re: having surgery, but
you know what....it is a decision I made after a 6 month education class
that my medical group required while concurrently speaking with a third
party administrator - coaching sessions required by my insurance company.
One class into the 12 I knew it was the right decision for me! What can I
say? The research I did before hand coupled with the one class - was all I
needed. I completed all of the education classes and continue with my
coaching calls every week - and this is all pre-op. I learned SO much and
had so many questions answered, it's been amazing! But ultimately it's a
decision you have to make for yourself, but you know what? If I had to
answer yeah or nah - I would recommend yeah everyday of the week and twice
on Sunday.
I am pre-op - waiting for my surgery date for route Y - gastric bypass
(anxiously awaiting, everytime the phone rings, I jump and answer it with
held breath). I know that it is the right decision for me and will continue
to stand by my decision regardless of what anyone says about my weight
("you should lose some weight" or "you're not that big, why
don't you just diet", the same stuff you hear every day), because like
you - I too, do not have any health issues - YET!
But everything runs in my family - obesity (mom and dad's side), high
cholestrol, blood pressure, diabetes, etc. My BMI is 40 (according to my
medical group and surgeon), I qualify with my BMI w/o any co-mordities.
My philosophy - I have decided to be proactive with my health/life instead
of reactive. I have decided that I want my future to be different - to use
this tool (my new pouch) to ensure my lifestyle change is a true lifestlye
change - for life. I am ready....just need a date and time and I will show
up with bells on.
Personaility wise - I, like you.... life of the party. Great sense of
humor. Everyone loves me - outgoing, great story teller, etc. I am not
worried. You know why? Once a funny person, always a funny person. Weight
loss or no weight loss....you can't lose your funny bone unless while on
the operating table they remove it, but it's not in your belly - so you
should be OK. LOL!
Danielle! I suggest an education class. See a surgeon. Get the facts on all
surgeries. Check with your insurance company - see what they will cover,
what their eligibility requirements are. Check with your medical group and
check their eligibility requirements. Get all of the facts and then make a
decision to be proactive with your future health/life as well.
Best of luck! If you need to talk or have questions, I have a ton of stuff
given to me at my education classes, etc. I would be happy to share!
Jammie
— jammerz
January 24, 2007
Well, I can't speak for everyone but I know that I haven't had a major
personality change. I'm still me, only thinner. I am still fun-loving and
enjoy humor, the only difference is that now I'm not quite as shy so I'm
more likely to share my humor with others. Another thing I have noticed in
myself is more self-esteem. I will not tolerate people taking advantage of
me as much any more. I now believe that I deserve to be happy so I'll tell
people when I am unhapy. Before, I would just keep quiet and then
eventually resent them for how they hurt me. Now, I speak up. I'm not sure
my boyfriend always appreciates that but I am much happier now. I had my
surgery in 2004 and it has been the smartest decision I've ever made. I am
much healthier and happier. But, it is a very personal decision so please
investigate thoroughly and consider all aspects of doing this before you
make a decision. Best wishes for health and happiness.
— djfoz
January 24, 2007
If you CAN lose weight without the surgery, you should. If you have the
surgery, you still have to diet and watch what you eat! However, if you
cannot lose weight through conventional means, you should have the surgery.
It does not change your personality perse, but looking better does give
people more confidence, so it might make you more outgoing.
— Novashannon
January 25, 2007
Danielle, hello. It sounds to me like you are a young woman with a lot of
questions and concerns. Being 245 pounds it not for for anyone, and even
though people talk, talk is cheap, but still hurts. You are doing good to
research and check into things. Take your time in your research, and don't
hop on board with surgery without long consideration to what you are doing.
Do you want children? Are you ready for a life change at a young age?
Surgery, whether lap band or gastric bypass is big stuff, and not that you
can't handle it, but things come into play like, having babies later on,
like marriage and involving others in your life that you haven't even met
yet. Like lifelong complications that might not be reversable. There is a
lot to consider. I am 46 years old, and almost 3 years ago I had gastric
bypass. I am thrilled with my surgery results and am so glad I made this
decision to have it. I bathed my decision in prayer before God and
researched for 9 months, and waited on my husband to come around to seeing
the benefits of surgery for me. I was 242 when I had surgery and a size
22ish, and now am 131 and sport a 4/6 size. Even though I love my size
change, it is the health benefits that I appreciate the most. I was
healthy like you when I had surgery, just obese and headed for health
issues. I had bp problems and cholesterol problems, but other than that it
was the pain of being so obese, physically. But I am 46, I have my 3
children and have raised them. I am a few years from empty nesting as our
3rd is getting ready for college in a year or so. I would strongly
encourage you to do the "biggest loser" type thing and see if
exercise, forced discipline and diet and exercise don't do it for you.
Obesity is a head issue with a body consequence. Surgery fixes the tool
that helps your body, but the head issues are still there. Perhaps if you
deal with the head issues and workout your body and mind, you will get the
results you need without surgery.
Regarding your 2nd question, I was very concerned that I would not be the
person I was as an obese person. I am loving, kind and very giving. I was
afraid that I would reject that as being a cloak for being obese. I prayed
a lot about this and friends prayed with me about this. God answered my
prayers and I am more loving, kind and giving than before, so in a sense I
did change, but it was a maturing of what God had already given me, not a
rejection of the gifts that I have. I am thankful to God for His
faithfulness to me. I wish you well in your journey, Patricia P
— Patricia P
January 25, 2007
Aloha Danielle! You are wise to consider health consequences at this point
in your life. I did'nt, and ended up with diabetes, high blood pressure,
sleep apnea and arthritis. And Im a NURSE! I should have known better! I
had a lap band 9-5-06 and don't regret it for a minute. I too developed a
funny, outgoing personality to compensate for being fat. And yes, the
words cut pretty deep. I have to say, that I am much happier now, and feel
so much better about myself, having had the surgery. It just keeps getting
better for me. As for the diets, research shows that for people who are
obese, diets alone are not effective. You need another tool to fight this
battle. And that tool is WLS. I did the research and decided to go with
the lap band, mostly due to the minimal amount of post op complications and
the reversibility if that should ever become necessary. I hope this helps.
Please feel free to ask me anything you want. Glenda
— gtali1954
January 25, 2007
Wow I knew this one would get a lot of answers so I am going to put my 2
cents in too. I have decided not to tell my friends and even some of my
family doesn't know. You can't do this or not do it because of what
someone else says. You need to do a lot of soul searching and figure out
what is best for YOU. Have you gone to an informational seminar yet? If
you haven't, that should be your first step. I know I was losing sleep
over it I was so torn. Then once I made the decision I couldn't decide
between the band and the rny. I have now made all my personal decisions
and will be having my procedure soon.
Don't worry about your personality changing. You will gain more
confidence. You sound like a lot of fun. Best of luck to you Danielle,
you will be in my prayers.
— KristineMarie
January 25, 2007
Hi Danielle! I will not tell you to have surgery only you can make the
right decision for yourself. What i will tell you is that I am thankful
everyday of my life that i had surgery. I was 25 when I had my surgery and
I fellt undeserving of many things happiness being one major one. I still
struggle with this occasionally but I feel human now. I feel normal. I,
too, have had the names called and would usually snap back with a f&*K
you! Well, now I am healthy. I decided that I wanted to enjoy my young
years and be happy and not wait for the awful comoribidities to occur. In
resposne to what patricia P said.... only 5% of people who lose major
weight while doing things like "the biggest loser" (which by the
way is ridiculous and not an option for most people who work/got to
school/have a fmaily etc) will keep it off forever. Statistics tell us that
95% will regain adn then some. Remember, she had surgery too so i don't
understand how she can get off telling you to try other methods. Also, it
is safer to have children AFTER WLS because you will be at a healthy
weight. Obese women who have children have much greater risk of
complications. Anyway, what i am trying to say is if this surgery is right
for you go for it and enjoy your youth. Don't date loser guys because you
think it is all you can get (if your self esteem is as low as mine was) or
let people treat you like a second class citizen. Yes, my personality is
different... I am confident, assertive, and HAPPY!!!! Only you can make the
choice to change who you are (inside and out!). Best wishes to you!!!
— SteffieBear15
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