I started thinking about wls back in Oct of 2002. My mom and dad had celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. We had a party and all of us kids were getting ictures of ourselves and our kids together. Well, I couldn't find a whole lot of me. And then when we had the party I realized that after getting my picture taken so many times that I was always on the other side of the lens. I began to fell really uncomfortable. And then it hit me like a train..... I was always the one taking them so I wouldn't have to see myself. But when we did get all of those pictures back and I saw myself I had no idea that I had gotten that big! How could I not know!? When did I get this way? I found out that a neighbor lady had wls done and started looking into it. So from October 02 till Feb 03 I read as much as I could. The good the bad and the ugly. I footnoted all the stories and then told my husband about it. He Had alot of questions. As he should. I took him to alot of the good and bad things I found, and he said if this is something you want to do then go for it. He found out that a lady at work had it done and got me her number and I talked to her about it. He has been really good about it so far. He will have to be Mr. MOM for a few weeks when I have my surgery and is ready for it I hope!
I have already been to see the dietician, then I saw the pulmonary physician and he cleared me for the surgery. Then I had my phyc evaluation. I don't know why but I was kinda worried about that one, but it went well. Now in 3 days I will finally get to meet Dr. Kerlakian! I am THRILLED! I meet someone through this site and she
recently had her surgery done by him. We have been keeping in touch and will meet the night before I go for my consultation. I have also been busy getting my house in order. That way when I do have the surgery everything will be organized for my husband. I have only told a handful of people about this surgery. I guess I am afraid that I will not get approved. I've told my mom and she is very supportive. It was a huge relief to tell her. I have also told 2 friends and 2 sisters. All a worried yet supportive. My mother-in-law will be the hardest. She at one time (just when I was thinking about wls) said that this surgery is a "cop-out". Kinda hurtful. I will tell more people when I get a surgery date and insurance approval. I hope when I tell my mother-in-law I can teach her about the wls, pros and cons. And how much it can improve not only the quality of my life but also add to the amount of years with my famiy.
4/26/03
After reading my first post I forgot to mention that I am not a good spelling and even worse at typing!!
4/29/03
I had my consultation yesterday with Dr. Kerlakian and everything was good. I liked him alot and I feel he went over everything well with me. He was worried about one thing and that is the drive from Cincinnati to my house....its 2 and 1/2 hours away. If I was to have any go wrong, what would I do. No one in this area does this surgery. Anyway, I did have a problem with one of his nurses. A long story short...she voiced her opinion about something that is none of her business. I was soo mad! I was all excited and I couldn't believe what had happened. When I got home from my long drive I had spoke with her and she admitted that she was wrong for saying anything and was sorry. We talked and in the end things where better. I told her I looked forward to seeing her in the next few months in getting ready for my surgery. I felt ALOT better after I had talked to her and told her how I felt. So the day ended on a good note.
Now I just have to wait for the insurance company to approve me!
5/15/03
I'M APPROVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I called my doctor last week they said they sent out the info to the insurance company on may 7. Insurance company received it on the 13th and approval came today! I called at 9 a.m. and so far no decision had been made. But I had to call again this afternoon! I just HAD TO! Buy 2:30 p.m. a letter of approval was in the mail the man said!! Now I am SCARED TO DEATH! Is this normal? I just have sooo many feelings right now. I hope by tomorrow I will have a date!
5/16/03
I am still going crazy about yesterdays news! I began to tell more people starting with my mother-in-law. She is the one how I had a hard time telling. She doesn't like it but is supportive. So far the rest of the family is the same way. I will tell my father this weekend. I can hear him now....why would you do this....what are you thinking.....I just don't understand why? I will just have to wait and see. The other thing is, when do I tell my children? A week before? Two maybe. Emma is 6 she may understand but the other two will not. They will just miss me alot...at least they better!
5/18/03
Well everyone now knows in my family. I told my father last night and everyone seems to have the same reaction.. worried yet supportive. I hope I have a date by the middle of the week. I hope it is somewhere around the July. If it is earlier than that I am not sure I nor my family is ready. I still have alot to get done around the house before surgery. But if it is before than ok...I will have to deal with it. I am excited and scared at the same time. When I go shopping I see clothing and say to myself ... next year I can where that, or this. I have never been in a two piece bathing suit and most likely never will. I have had 3 children, even if I do loose alot of weight that still does not get rid of my stretch marks! And I am fine with that.
5/21/03
Still no date as of yet. Doc's office called today and said someone will be calling me next week. Sometime in July she said. That's a good time, it gives me plenty of time to get ready mind, body and soul. I have been paying alot of attention to labels lately looking for high protein foods and low in sugar and carbs. Plus taste! If I am concerned about one part of the surgery it would have to be having a blood clot. I am terrified of that. I guess because it can happen in such a short time. I need to talk to Dr.K about what his way of dealing with it is. If he does a filter or blood thinner meds. Just another question added to an already long list of questions. July is a good time to do it b/c my husband is in the navy reserves and has to do is 2 weeks in June. Last year he got to go to Florida and this year its Virginia. And he will be home at the end of June just in time for my surgery I
5/23/03
I have a date! July 16,2003!! That is perfect. Not to soon and yet not to far away. It is a 2 and a half hour drive for me to the hospital so we will be going down on the 15th. 7:30 A.M. is the time. I am unbelievably SCARED! There is just no other way to put it. I'm I doing the right thing? Yes, I think so. I hope so. My father keeps asking me....do you think it will be worth it...or...is it worth all of this? I just say yes I believe so.
I am eating alot.. and then some. I have so much to do. Before I was stressed that I wouldn't get approved and now I am stressed about other things. Like.. who will take care of the kids... who is going to do the cleaning, laundry. How will my husband deal with all of this. He will have to take FMLA for maybe 2 weeks. Will he survive the kids? The bad part is that he is currently working third shift...witch means his sleeping will be totally of. Thus making things even more harder. We will somehow work things out.
5/30/03
I went to the doctor yesterday and I got one the scales.... I have lost 3 pounds. I guess since I have been so busy lately getting things ready for my surgery I have lost some pounds. I have been eating like crazy though. So that makes me at 220!
6/11/03 The days are coming closer and closer to my surgery day and I want to make a list of things I can't wait to do: bend over and tie my shoes...and BREATH, not cross my legs when I sneeze, smaller bra with matching panties shop at old navy, gap, lerners, wear a pair of low rider jeans (who wouldn't want that), be on top:) run and jump with my kids and not get out of breath, BE HEALTHY AND HAPPY:) I am meeting some really great people through this site and I just don't know what I would do without it. It is great to have the support of your family. But to talk to people on a daily basis is wonderful. To know that someone else has all the same crazy thoughts and feeling as me is nice. I have 35 days left and I CAN'T WAIT!!
6/19/03
I got 27 days left till my surgery day and boy am I busy getting things done. This seem to be comming together well. The hospital called me today to confirm all of my insurance info and I made sure to ask for a private room too. Then today in the mail I got my husbands fmla paper work and it was approved. On the 30th I go for all of my pre-op stuff and before I know it I will be a LOOSER!!
6/22/03
Oh my gosh, only 23 days left! It seems like just a few days ago wrote 35 days...where does the time go? I'll tell ya....cleaning and organizing! Thats mainly what I have been doing these last 2 weeks. I am really ready for this. A little scared but mainly just at peace with my decision. I love writing to people and reading others journeys....its I am like a sponge, I want to know all I can. Ever day that passes is one day closer. And I supose that as my day gets closer I may get freaked out, I will have to deal with that then.
6/29/03
I go to see Dr.K tomorrow for my pre-op visit and I am ready.I want to write some things down about I I feel so someday I can look back on this and remember how I felt.
I want to be able to get up and walk and not feel like a robot. My feet and knees hurt soooo bad. I can hardly walk. the stiffness and pain.
I hate that I get out of breath so easily
My back hurts
Its hard to snap my bra together
I an getting nervous about my upcomming surgery. The other night I had a dream that I had the surgery and didn't loose a pound:( How bad would that be! Really BAD! I am told that this is a normal part of the process so I hope it passes.
6/30/03
I had my pre-op visit today and it went well. But before I even got in there and most of the way down I was soooo nervous.If I was that nervous today I can't imagine how bad I will be on THE BIG DAY. My date is for the 16th, my husband and I will be going down the night before (long drive) and will be having my final meal. But I bet I will be so nervous I won't be able to eat. I just need to take it slow. Keep busy and everything will be ok.
7/10/03
ok I have 6 days till surgery and I am amazinly calm about it! Last week I was really nervous but for some reason I am duing very well. I am eating a lot of my favorite this week...and I mean A LOT! I just can't wait for the surgery and the pain to be over so I can concentrate on my weight loss. I also need to keep more busy...I have been kinda lazy these past few days. I hope these last few days fly by.
6/20/03
WELL I MADE IT....I"M A LOOSER! A looser in a lot of pain but non the less a looser. I sure do hope this recoupreation time is fast. I think I would rather have 10 babies than go through this. Granted with my babies I alwaly had an eperderal and I never had a trear to stitch. I am duing well at getting in all of my water and am trying some food. Mainly sf jello and sf popsicles. My husband was great in the hospital and is really steping up to the plate here at home too. Everday does get a little bit easier..but I just want to be pain free NOW!! I will write more when I am feeling better...no more pitty party for me.
6/23/03
Everyday gets a little bit easier than the last. Then pain is starting to diminish. I am drinking enough water but I an scared to try new food. I am question this surgery..maybe just one more diet...I am young somethings gotta work..but I hope this what the right decision. I am told that these of feelings are normal..especially in the early eeks. I just need to keep focused and keep hope. My husband is duing well with the kids and with the house. I MISS HOLDING AND HUGGING MY CHILDREN. I never realized just how much I would hug and cuddle with them. But I will get better and I will make up for all the lost hugs.
6/25/03
I am doing better and better with every passing day. Today I had tuna with mayo and 1 cracker...and it went fine! I am doing really well with water. I am probably doing more than what I am suposed. I just hope nothing happens. I go for my 2 week check up on monday and I think I could be down about 10-15 pounds. Accourding to my scale it says 20 pounds but I don't think that is right. We went to walmart today and then I came home and took a 3 hour nap...was I wore out or what. And tonight we hit some garage sales and I am doing fine. I just want to be able to pick up heavy things again...you know..laundry baskets, bend over and pull the weeds from my flowers, sleep in my own bed. I can take naps but to quite sleep the whole night. I just hope things keep getting better and better.
6/28/03
I had my 2 week check up today and everything is going ok. I was told not to eat solid food just yet though. I think it was that piece of pizza I told him about. I have lost 20 pounds but I think 1/2 of it is water. I am getting really tired of those protien shakes...YUCK! I will have to find something else.If I do not take a nap I can bearly make it to 9 at night. I do need a nap everyday!
7/1/03
I am 2 1/2 weeks out and I am doing ok. Some days are better than others...and some are just terrible. I am tired of eating the same foods..I want to eat regular food. I think I have lost another 5 pounds or so but I don't see it. I did have some wonderful chocolate sf ice cream the other night...boy was that great!:) But I ate the whole thing...granted it was a small but still. And after I got done eating it about 10 minutes later I felt like I had the flu. Just kinda a yucky feeling in my stomach and I felt a flushed....I think I may of over eaten. I didn't get sick but I just didn't feel to good for about and hour. I never realized how much I use to eat until now. But I sure do miss it. I just have to keep reminding myself why I am doing this. I want to live to see my grandchildren and be healthy and happy.
8/5/03
Well its been almost 3 weeks....I am hangin' in there! I want so bad to eat just normal food now. Pizza, chicken, beef any thing other than soup and mush. I got yelled at by people for eating to solid foods to soon and I don't want something to go wrong and have to start all over again. So I starting eating soft foods again. I am down to 197 if my scale is right. Sometimes it says 195 but thats only in the morning. I am still uncertain weather or not I did the right thing. I guess time will tell.
8/9/03
Well the scale says 195 and it has said that for a couple of days now. So I got on my tred mill today and will everyday to keep the weight falling. I am starting at 1 mile at a slow walking pace till my doctor clears me for more excersize. I am doing things I probably shouldn't be doing . Like mowing the lawn and using the sweeper. I am feeling good...food is getting ealier to deal with.
8/11/03
Still at 195!!! I have gotten into the bad habbit of weighing myself every morning...so today I told my husband to hide the scale and only give it to me on Mondays! That way I can rejoice over 5 pounds lost rather than 1 pound or so.
8/16/03
Well its been 1 month. I haven't weighed myself in a week so last known pounds lost is 30...but I did check my measurments...total inches lost so far is 20!!! WOW!! How cool is that! Come monday morning I will wiegh myself and I hope I am happy with scale.
8/18/03
Its monday and a good day! I got on the scale today and I have lost 4 more pounds:)!! That puts me at 191 pounds and in a size 15/16!
8/20/03
I found the scale...I wasn't looking for it I just found it. So I just had to weigh myself...192!!WHAT!! I gained a pound..NO! Since I can no longer have chocolate my new vice is those pesky CARBS! So I gotta watch them. But here is the funny thing. I put on a pair of 15 jeans and they fit! They didn't last week but now they do. I am so happy today. I feel so much more confident in myself. More proud of myself in years.
8/29/03
Well I finally got that scale to move...all the way down to 185!! I had my 6 week check up the other day and everything is going well. I don't have to go back till January. Now the last time they had me weigh in I weighed 222 that was 2 weeks before surgery. They didn't weigh me in at the hospital the morning of my surgery but my scale said I weighed 225. So I had gained 3 pounds in those last 2 weeks of last meals. So that is a loss of 40 pounds!!! I can't wait to do my measurment on the 16th of Sept. Food is going down well and I have yet to dump or get sick(knock on wood).
9/2/03
September...new month...new weight! I am now down to 184! I am finally starting to be glad that I had this surgery. I have adjusted my eating habbits, gotten use to a lot of food that I can no longer have and even gotten into an excersize patten. Sometimes I do get the munchies( especially when it is that time of the month). But I just try to keep busy or just leave the house all together.
9/12/03
I have been making some bad food choices lately so my weight has only gone down to 182. I haven't had a protein shake in 2 weeks so that is NOT good. I need to get some I know. I have been eating alot of carbs and testing my limits on sugar. The other day I made some brownies. It said 13g. of sugar per square..I ate 2 and had no problems. Is that good or bad? I kinda wish I did dump to keep me on track with good eating habits. Plus I haven't been on the tread mill in 2 weeks so that is no help. What is wring with me? I am just in a rut..I kinda thought it would just fall off and wouldn't have to try to hard. Boy was I wrong.
9/14/03
Well I gave myself a big swift kick in the but and got myself back on track! I bought some protein shakes and went to the store and stocked up on healthy food and today I am down 3 pounds! What is even more exciting is the fact that I am at 179!! YEAH I AM IN THE 170'S!! I haven't been on the tredmill yet but I plan to today.
9/16/03
Its been 2 months today that I had my surgery. And on the 16th of evry month I will rty to take my measurments. Last month was 20 inches...and this month is 12 inches...so my total so far is 32 inches!!!!!!!!!!!!!
9/21/03
50 POUNDS GONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW!!!!!!!! Today the scale says 175 pounds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
9/28/03
A BIG day for me. I measured myself today and I grew an inch! I guess all that extra weight compressed my spine and made me shorter...is that possible? So now I am 5'4 inches and weight in at 173 pounds! Witch makes me OVERWEIGHT!!! No longer MO or SO! My eting is doing well. I am getting in my protien shakes and eating my protien and so on. I've been keeping busy around the house too. I am so much energy, I don't need anap in the middle of the day. I sleep around 6-7 hours a night and wake up rested and full of energy. I HAVE NO REGRETS!!!!
10/5/03
I have to go to the doctor! I have been getting HORRIBLE heartburn. To the point I feel like I am going to throw up. Yesterday I only got in 8 oz. of water. It seems anything I eat brings it on even water! I can't live like this. On to a more happir note I weighed in today at 169 pounds!! I am getting closer to the weight it says on my drivers licenes of 155. That was what I weighed when I got married. I was told the other day that I look 19 again! I am 27(soon to be 28) so that really made my day. I went into a local hardwear store the other day and there was 3 men at the register. As I was walking up to the register all 3 said "may I help you with something?". Before I would of had to of asked for help when I weighed 225 pounds. Just even walking into Lowes and walking men would come up to me and ask if I needed any help. Before I would have had to hunt a worker down. I feel AMAZING. I love this surgery.
I almost forgot, the other night my husband told me that I was BEAUTIFUL! I stoped what I was doing and looked at him...he was never told me that I was beautiful. He always said pretty or sexy but never beautiful. I know that he loves me but I felt really loved at that moment.
10/12/03
I went out last night...but first I went shopping! I wore a size 11 strech LOW RIDERS! LOW RIDERS can you believe it!! I had a GREAT time. I am at 169 pounds. I ave fallen into some really bad eating habbits and it is my goal this week to correct it. CARBS ARE THE ENEMY!
10/19/03
Things are going so well for me lately. On tuesday my husband and I will be cellebrating our 8th wedding anniversary(I GOT DIAMOND EARINGS!)The scale is going down,my kids are all healthy,my moms cancer numbers are going down and just as important is the fact the she is feeling well 60% of the time. Today the scale says 163 pounds. I went shopping last night at Victoia Secrets---this place will be my new addiction. God I love that store. I spent an hour and a half there and too much money!I enjoy getting up every morning and starting a new day. I hope God keeps all these blessing rolling in.
11/1/03
I want to put a curse on all this halloween candy!! I don't buy candy anymore to keep in the house so having all this candy is tempting. I have to confess I have had a few pieces of candy. But nothing like other years. I would have 10 or so bite size bars and know 1 and a sucker is almost too sweet. I was on my period last week so of course no big weight loss to report...only 2 pounds...I'll take it though.
11/15/03
This was a bad month. I did my measurments today and I only lost 2 inches and 6 pounds! I can believe it...my eating habbits have gone to pot. But today is a new day. We bought a crossbow and I have been on it and my tredmill everyday for the last 4 days. Hey its a start.
11/18/03
Its my Brithday!!! YEAH!!! I still weigh in at 157 pounds(thanks to my "friend" and on my b-day to.) But I haven't weight 157 pounds on my b-day since I turned 13 and was in the 7th grade! I also realized something else today..I am only 2 pounds away from weighing what my drivers licenes weight! How about that?! I am now 28 and happy. If I didn't have wls and had my b-day I would hate that it was my b-day. I would feel fat,lonely,sad,depressed,and OLD! But I did so I feel HAPPY,THINNER,JOY,FOOT LOOSE,AND YOUNG!!!
11/27/03
The weight is comming off really slow these days. I was at 157 for about 3 weeks and it has finally moved to 155. I have up'd my excersize and really started to look at the amount of carbs I have been eating.Here's hopen the scale god's are in my corner.
12/14/03
Slow...Slow...Slow is the scale these days. I knew the great weight loss would slow down eventually but it is frustrating. I am very happy with my weight but would still like to loose 25 more pounds. Right now I am at 152 pounds. This month I lost 6 inches so that is good. I love the reaction I get from people that I haven't seen in a long time and I just LOVE going shopping!!
12/16/03
Happy 5 month anniverisary to ME!! 74 pounds less of ME!! I wanted so bad to be able to say 75 pounds but I'm not going to complain. Today I weigh in at 151 pounds.
12/18/03
5 months and 2 days it took to loose 75 pounds. I am so excited that I only have 25 more pounds to loose till I reach my goal of 125. It just blows my mind to even think I am this far in 5 months. Thank you Dr. K.!!
1/1/04
Happy New Year....and a happy one indeed. Today I weigh in at 148 pounds. Thats 77 pounds gone and 23 to goal. I found out over christmas that I weigh the least between my sisters. Kinda hard for me to believe b/c I still don't see myself thin yet. The picture in my mind is not the same as how other people see me I guess.
1/17/04
It has been six months since surgery!!! NO WAY!!! It feels like maybe 2 months ago. My how time flies. My weight has not down down to much more. But then again my eating has been absolutly HORRIBLE!! I am down to 146 pounds. I am down a total of 79 pounds and an AMAZING 63 inches. I need to get back on track. LESS CARBS!!! I CAN DO IT!!
1/30/04
I went for my 6 months check-up last week and it went very well! When the nurse called my name and I got up she looked at me then looked at the chart and looked at me again...and looked at the chart AGAIN! She said "I knew you would be thinner but not THIS thin!" I just smiled. This is the same nurse that I had a problem with at my consoulation appt. We had resolved that and now things are fine. Dr.K said that my progress is amazing and I am at a good weight now and if I hadn't lost anymore weight he would be pleased. My personal goal I told him was 125 and he said that was fine. One thing I am happy about is that I can have POP again. I have only had a few sips of my husbands at the movies but it was heavenlly. I really do miss pop. I had to have that morning can like other people have to have a cup of coffee. As of this morning I am down to 143 pounds and doing well!
3/16/04
Its been 8 months ago today I had my surgery. I now weigh in at 140 pounds and am happy. So far my total weight lost is 90 pounds and 70 inches!! My weight has been really slow lately but then again my eating habbits have been the worst ever!! Lots of carbs and Easter candy is now out. I can resist candy bars (actually now candy bars are nasty to me) but those mini cadbury eggs are my down fall BIG TIME!!! We got a dog last week and I have been walking with her on a daily basis so my excersice is still there. I found out about 2 weeks ago that I have gallstones so I will have to get that taken out in the next few months. I love going shopping for clothes....just love it!! I love the way I get looked at when I go places, the attention I get is wonderful and I never get tired of it. But I am most greatful to be HEALTHY!!
5/8/04
WOW,how time flies. Things are going well for me. I still weigh in at 140 pounds and I think I just may stay there. And that number is OK with me. My own peronal goal was 125 but I think that number now is to low. If I loose anymore wieght thats great but if not then thats fine too. This week I had my gall bladder taken out and everything is fine. I had it done lap and I can't get over the recovery time of it. Its SO MUCH EASIER than being cut open. I go back for a 1 year check up soon in july so I hope things coninue to go good.
6/28/04
I now have lost 97 pounds and weigh in at 133! I really thought I was done loosing weight b/c I would loose and gain the same few pounds for weeks. But seeing how it is summer and we tend to get out more and eat less or better anyway I guess I lost a few more pounds. People ask me how much more am I going to loose and I say I just don't know....I'm not even trying to loose. This is the first time time in my life that I love the summer. I love sleevless shirst and being in my swimsuit! WOW, never thought I would say that. I try to walk 4-5 days a week. I am no Richard Simmons, I don't go all crazy with excersing but a nice brisk wald with maybe a little jog is good for me. I am looking for a full time job. Something in an office type of place. Wish me Luck!I really need to get a new picture up. That picture is from about 25-30 pounds ago.
November 11. 2005
Amazing!!! I haven't been here in over a year. Life is really wonderful for me. I have gained a few pounds, back up to 143. But thats okay. I want to loose a few more for a wedding I am in in April. I found out I really like palites. I am working full time now and really enjoy my job and the people I work with. Scott and I are doing great. We just celebrated our 10 year anniversary. Our 3 kids are doing well also. I have NO REGRETS! I would do it all over again. When I look at old picks of me or even just think about myself being heavy I have a hard time seeing myself in that heavy body. The same person in some ways and yet different in others. I can only discribe this surgery in one way....LIFE ALTERING...for the better!
Profile by Min an Obesityhelp Volunteer
