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Obesity & Me

Describe your behavioral and emotional battle with weight control before learning about bariatric surgery.

My battle with weight control seemed like forever but most of all for at least the last 23 years I have been morbidly obese. I think the emotional part is what got to me the most. The feelings of shame and inadequacy. I thought if I hear one more person say but your soooo pretty! I'd scream! The head games for me hurt the most. Always sizing things up to see if i'd fit. Having to be the first inline at the airport to get my pic of seat or to be able to ask for a seatbelt extension without the whole world hearing. Talk about embarrassing! But most of all the years of not feeling worthy and ashamed of how I looked. Especially with young kids. I never wanted them to get teased because they had a FAT mom! But through the years and with alot of counseling, I learned to love myself to the best of my ability. I put on a happy face which most of the time was real except for my fat! People would tell me that it was my personality and positive outlook that drew them too me....and that they didnt look at me as FAT! Yeah ok whatever! We know better...but then I guess that meant that they loved me for who I was..unconditionally. And thank god for that! As for the behavioral part...hmmm...I always tried to figure out why I over ate or binged or whatever....sometimes I would ask myself right at that moment.."WHAT AM I FEELING?" Why am I eating right now when I know i'm not hungry? I think it was just out of boredom or the anger I felt toward myself for letting me get like that. But thats all different now. I love the new me and thanks to the many years of counseling prior, I do not have the same head battles that alot of people go through. Do I still want to eat at times out of boredom or what not...sure I do....but I try to have the strength not too. I do not deprive myself either. Most importantly, this tool has given me back my life which is what you will hear alot! I stop when I am full and I eat what I want. I also make sure that I reevaluate my goals from time to time. IF I plateau for a bit or dont lose what I'd like to...then I REFOCUS! Cut the carbs, up the water, up the protien etc...WE KNOW WHAT TO DO! You just have to DO IT! Hold habit die hard so PLEASE make sure your head is in the right place when you make the decision to have this surgery...it is NOT a quick fix! ITs a life long battle but with the help of this too if used wisely YOU CAN DO IT! ALso, please visit the message boards and read others profiles. There are many aspects and ups and downs in this journey and we are all different...your journey wont be like anyone elses but you need to READ READ READ so you know some of the feelings and concerns to expect. Would I do it again? ABSOLUTELY! In a MINUTE! Best to all of you who are thinking of this journey! Julie :-)

What was (is) the worst thing about being overweight?

Being uncomfortable and trying to feel comfortable in my own skin. Not to mention the ridicule of others. OUCH!

How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

Several friends had had it. I was still not ready. It took me over 2 years to make this decision and alot of research.

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

My experience was "A PIECE OF CAKE"! My advice is to NEVER GIVE UP and if your insurance wont approve it and you can afford the payments "GET A LOAN"! It will change your life!

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

First visit was good, smooth and I asked alot of questions...I think that is the best way to get the most out of this meeting. Do lots of research on the surgery itself and YOUR SURGEON! Ask LOTS of questions too! BE PREPARED!

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

I was SICK AND TIRED OF BEING SICK AND TIRED and NOT BEING ABLE TO LIVE MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST! You will hear many people say "IT GAVE ME BACK MY LIFE!" OH YEAH!

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

I just chose the surgery that my surgeon performed which was RNY. I knew my surgeon was VERY fine tuned with this surgery and had heard and seen nothing but praises about him.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

I had all the fears that we all have...fear of the unknown, fear of dying but my over all feeling that got me through it was "I was healthy and had no real co-morbidities other than my poor knees hurting and high triglycerides. I knew in my heart that I would be ok but there is always that chance of death. ALot of people would say that they felt they would DIE WITHOUT THE SURGERY"! THis could be true! I prayed alot and even as they wheeled me in to the OR, I said "Please lord bring me through this". What I would tell others that if you never try, you'll never know! You could die shouting "WHAT IF"! Thats my story and i'm sticking to it!

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

I was lucky! I had nothing but POSITIVE reactions from family and friends and NOTHING but positive afterwards. My husband was a little nervous mostly because we were newlyweds and he thought that i'd get all skinny and want to leave him. ARe you kidding I told him? IT took me my whole life to find him! This has been such a bonding experience for us both....and OH WHAT FUN! heehee

How did your employer/supervisor react to your decision? What did you tell him/her? How long were you out of work?

I was honest with my boss and told her exactly what I was having done. I dont know that she knew what to expect but she does now! I was off two weeks and that was plenty of time! I did have Laproscopic. Open patients will need longer to heel. But if your up and moving around from day one like they tell you then you will feel better and be moving around sooner!
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Before & After
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