Describe your behavioral and emotional battle with weight control before learning about bariatric surgery.
My eating has always been bad. Food is how my mom showed love sometimes. She worked alot and wasn't home much. when she did come home she would bring me a "treat". It was a box of Little Debbie cakes and as early as 10 I can remember eating the whole box myself. I never really learned how to eat healthy and we never had family meals where we ate together. When I moved out on my own i was clueless, and quite honestly I would rather spend my money on beer and partying then healthy food. I started drinking really heavily and gaining weight in 11th grade. I went from 210lbs to 225 lbs my senior year. By 19 I was 250lbs, and at 20 I was 275. By 23 I was at 320 and maintained that weight during my pregnancy. A bad relationship and heavy drinking and by 27 I was 360. In the past 4 years I have gained 120lbs. But more importantly I have been for those 4 years. It feels great to look back on my sobriety , but I would enjoy it so much more if I could move!!!! I replaced alcohol with food, alcohol was my comfort, I would find a reason to drink no matter what. Happy, Sad, depressed anything. Now I find that I do that with food. Giving up alcohol was so much easier then giving up bad foods has been.
What was (is) the worst thing about being overweight?
The worst thing about being overweight is not being able to show my son who I really am. I'm no longer spontaneous and fun like I once was. I fear he will never know how much life I have trapped under this fat. I want to take him to an amusement park and ride a rollercoaster with him. I want him to cuddle up next to me without me having to put on that damn cpap! I hate going paces and trying to scan the room for a chair that I can fit in. I can't fit into clothes sold in a regular store, even the plus size stores don't carry my size.I have to shower up to 3 times a day to keep from smelling. I can barely reach my own ass. Standing is uncomforatble, sitting is uncomfortable. The only comfy position is laying in bed. Sitting on the sidelines watching other people live while life passes you by day after day!
If you have had weight loss surgery already, what things do you most enjoy doing now that you weren't able to do before?
On my weigh, not there yet, I'll report back