Anyone else have reationship problems now???

Lauren1979
on 4/24/09 2:15 am - Holden, MA
So since surgery I have lost 127 lbs... not bad I must say. During the last year my husband has gained about 60 lbs. I find myself getting so frustrated trying to get him to exercise. I physically was to the point I couldn't exercise and had been that way for about 8 years before surgery... he still can exercise, but its not going to be long till he can't... I know I used to get mad when people pressured me to do things...so how do I get him to the gym??? I've tried everything.... anyone else having any relationship issues since the weight loss? I have a few friends that are kinda jealous also... saying things like oh now I'm the fat friend... okay so now I know how they thought of me... I was what just a confidence booster for the slightly overweight friends??? I kinda heard this might happen but didn't expect it from my friends. I also love when people tell me I shouldn't be eating something...HELLO I'm the one that went to a year of classes and learned the right way, went through surgery, yet they feel the need to pipe in... I love saying to them I can eat what I want just same amounts...so shove it....lol...I just needed a good venting and wanted to know if I'm the only one???

"Life is way to short to live in the past" and "keep your feet on the ground while reaching for the stars"

Shewolf
on 4/28/09 5:17 am - Rusk, TX
I know the feeling Lauren , concerning friends, coworkers and ex husbands.  I have been hearing since January " Don't lose anymore weight"  I can't begin to tell you how many times a week I hear " Shelia if you don't quit losing weight you're gonna dry up and blow away." 
Oh ! and people telling me I can eat anything I want to since I've had the surgery.  They look at me like I'm nuts when I tell them " No, I can't."  My sister, who had a Lapband 4.5 years ago( it didn't work) is always trying to get me to eat sweets.  My best friend is always trying to feed me something.  I'm smaller than she is now by 4 sizes and I really think it bothers her.
I get sooooo frustrated, I mean what did they think when I told em I was gonna have the surgery?  Did they think I would just lose a few pounds and stay fat?    Some days I just want to blow up and tell everyone to just F--- Off!

Shelia


 

Jeffrey B.
on 4/26/12 6:38 am, edited 4/26/12 6:38 am - Sherwood, AR
I have also had some issues along those lines. The worst it that it as caused my wife some depression. I feel like I'm walking on egg shells right now, because I'm only 10 lbs heaver then her (I started 200+ lbs heaver). Last week I accidentally put on a pair of her jeans, it about caused her to cry.

Mind you she has lost 60 lbs just by eating better, because I'm eating, but she just can't see it in herself.
Jeffrey B.
on 5/14/12 6:39 am - Sherwood, AR
Jeffrey B.
on 5/14/12 6:39 am - Sherwood, AR
Jeffrey B.
on 5/14/12 6:40 am - Sherwood, AR
I don't think it's that people actually 'Don't want us to get skinny or at least not skinnier than them".  I think that our weight loss reminds them of the fact that they need to lose weight.  Remember back when you were at your highest weight.  Did you like hearing that your friend lost 20, 40 or more lbs?  I sure didn't.  It made me feel fatter.  However, the opposite should apply.  People should be happy for your success, just like you are for them.  I was glad as my wife lost her weight.  Now that we are both losing weight, she should be happy for me also, even thought that is not always the case.
Lauren1979
on 4/29/09 12:23 am - Holden, MA
I hear ya Sheila... its like they really didn't want us to get skinny or at least not skinnier than them. Why is it so hard for people just to be happy for us. I'm glad I'm not the fat friend anymore, but it stinks that someone even has to be... I'm a lucky one I can eat basically whatever I want, just not alot of anything. I kinda wish I did have some intolerances because its so easy to make the wrong choices. I still feel like I'm dieting sometimes and I'm really busting my hunp to loose the last 50 lbs I want to loose. I hope things get better because I don't want to loose friendships, but the rate its going it might have to be that way in order for me to be happy....

"Life is way to short to live in the past" and "keep your feet on the ground while reaching for the stars"

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