Eating Intervention of a Different Sort

cathey9338
on 8/7/12 5:39 am - Woodbridge, VA
RNY on 06/19/12 with
Below is my blog entry from last Friday.  It's amazing the difference a few days makes (and a change in perspective!)

Yesterday:
Calories  672
Steps  2783
Protein 38g

I still have a ways to go but the energy I have now - especially compared with the energy I have had for the last six weeks - well... I'm just bursting at the seems to take on world!!

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Last night I attended our monthly WLS class (officially it’s a support group but I prefer to call them classes – less hokey sounding).  I’ve made several friends and really enjoy the info I get from the class.  Afterward we were all standing around admiring two gorgeous women who’d each lost 120+ lbs since their surgeries in late Jan/Feb.  120 lbs already?!?!  WOW!  I want to do that!!!


In the course of our amazement, I “bragged" that the day before I’d only eaten 110 calories and I burned 208 calories on the treadmill.  I thought it was pretty cool.  Turns out I could not have been more wrong.

I spent the next 30 minutes listening to a dozen people explain to me why I had to eat more and why my non-eating was directly related to my persistent (now routine) throwing up, not to mention muscle loss and future hair loss.  It was very loving but very brutal (honesty sometimes is).  Turns out my stomach is forgetting how to eat because it’s been six weeks since surgery and I’ve truly eaten very little since then. 

I’m really good at throwing up now.  I’ve had lots of practice – I can even do it driving down the highway!  Of course there isn’t anything in my stomach so it’s mostly just going through the motions.  Initially I was throwing up because I was dehydrated but now I’m hydrated and still throwing up because my stomach doesn’t know what to do with this foreign substance called food.  In two weeks I go for my nutritionist to approve all foods – bye bye mushie stage!!  But they said last night if I don’t learn how to eat between now and then she won’t approve me moving into the next stage!

So here I sit today @ 11:32am… I’ve had an egg and that’s it.  I’m wondering how to get back on track.  I was a superstar after surgery.  Then I got a kidney infection (directly related to surgery).  It’s been three weeks since I was diagnosed with my kidney infection and I still haven’t regained my superstar status.  I always get in my 64oz of water but that’s the only thing I can guarantee I do right (well that and the treadmill).  I did order some protein snacks (finally).

I’m going to see my PCP about my kidney infection.  Hopefully the antibiotic she gives me won’t be another horse pill. 

I do not want to be a repeat offender.  I do not want to lose all this weight only to regain it.  I do not want to fail.

I want to change who I am – or at least how I cope and what motivates me.  The rest of me is pretty awesome.  I have plans to run the Marine Corps Marathon 2013.  I’ve backtracked the steps I need to take to do it successfully and I believe I am on track.  I want the new me to be healthy – healthy eating, healthy exercise, healthy living AND healthy thinking.

But it is so hard… Not too hard I can’t achieve it.  The Navy SEALs say “the only easy day was yesterday" and the Marines say “pain is just weakness leaving the body" so I guess I better get with it! 

(Now if I can just turn these words (talk) into action!)

        
M M
on 8/7/12 11:57 pm
 Clearly you are aware of the need to change.

Aim for 50+ grams of quality protein, and the calories will follow.


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