Dating after surgery

Lady2This
on 10/25/18 7:28 am - NC

Has anyone had issues with dating after surgery? The thing is that, I feel like I'm cat fishing people. I look great in clothes but different without, which could be a big turn off. I sabotage things before they get a chance to began, because of how I look without clothes. It just makes me depressed and feel as if there's no reason to date. I'm sure I can't be the only one that feels this way. Thank you

mershmellow
on 10/25/18 7:33 am
VSG on 01/12/17

I have dated after my surgery, though I have never thought to bring up that my skin might make me look like a melted candle. Though, honestly while I enjoy the company, my interest in intimacy with someone else is at a 0. I'm a big of a weirdo that way, maybe it'll change, but right now anything more than going out on dates is a hard pass for me.

I would say just be honest about everything and upfront about your situation. Explain that you have lost weight and are healthy, but that weight loss has given you some extra skin. If they have a problem with it, then you know you don't want to be dating them anyway.

Surgery January 17, 2017

5'8, female

HW 485, SW 471, GW 160, CW 120-130. Currently trying to gain weight.

Lady2This
on 10/25/18 7:35 am - NC

I needed that laugh! I had to laugh at the melted candle part! LOL!! Great advice! You're right! Thank you so much!

Gwen M.
on 10/25/18 7:45 am, edited 10/25/18 12:45 am
VSG on 03/13/14

There is nothing at all weird about not being interested in intimacy!

(I'm saying this not as an "OMG YOU'RE WRONG" comment but as an "OMG, you're awesome and don't sell yourself short like that! It's totally okay!")

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

mershmellow
on 10/25/18 8:08 am
VSG on 01/12/17

Thank you! I look at it this way, look at all the free time I get! I'm definitely someone who likes to be in my own little private bubble.

Surgery January 17, 2017

5'8, female

HW 485, SW 471, GW 160, CW 120-130. Currently trying to gain weight.

Gwen M.
on 10/25/18 8:17 am
VSG on 03/13/14

That's a great way to look at it :)

Sometimes I wish I had more time in my own little private bubble...

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Kristi T.
on 10/25/18 9:33 am - MT
VSG on 02/09/16

I have zero interest too Mer****hink it's more common than we realize. I even had a little Testosterone added to my hormone therapy, that didn't help at all:-)

mershmellow
on 10/25/18 9:49 am
VSG on 01/12/17

I always knew we were alike!

Surgery January 17, 2017

5'8, female

HW 485, SW 471, GW 160, CW 120-130. Currently trying to gain weight.

jmm1234
on 10/25/18 12:43 pm
DS on 11/01/14
Partlypollyanna
on 10/25/18 9:17 am
RNY on 02/14/18

Just because you looks different out of clothes, don't feel you are cat fishing anyone! I don't think people that use the wonderbra, use booty pads (which really are a thing!) or heck people that use spanx, all of which change appearance, feel that way!

HW: 306 SW: 282 CW:144.8 GW: 145 (reached 2/6/19), next goal - 132.9

Jen

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