Newbie!!!

Kassyyy13
on 1/25/19 10:28 am

So I will be having vsg in about 2 months and I'm soaking up as much info as i possibly can. Is there anything (good and bad) that you have had happen or wished you would have known?

Sparklekitty, Science-Loving Derby Hag
on 1/25/19 2:43 pm
VSG on 12/10/13

There are a LOT of stories on this board, good and bad. Start paging back through old posts and reading, and you'll find a bunch of good information.

Nerdy Little Secret (#42) - Derby Strong!


HW 300 / LW 150 / Post-regain goal: 170

Kassyyy13
on 1/25/19 3:43 pm

Ive went back a ton of pages but I still would like to hear stories. Sometimes people lurk and don't post and sometimes people may have thought of something new. I'm just scared, excited, nervous, and overjoyed all at once so anything helps :)

Citizen Kim
on 1/25/19 5:54 pm, edited 1/25/19 9:55 am - Castle Rock, CO

Honestly, Sparklekitty's advice is really good. There is a wealth of information here and I doubt there's anything that hasn't been asked or answered, so you're unlikely to get a ton of useful replies to your question.

It's been a year or two since I was pre-op, but I get how exciting and yet scary it is. There are menu threads every day on the surgery boards and they're a great place to see how people are doing and make friends.

Proud Feminist, Atheist, LGBT friend, and Democratic Socialist

Gwen M.
on 1/26/19 9:16 am
VSG on 03/13/14

Congrats on your upcoming surgery!

When I was pre-op, I read through as many of the historical posts in the VSG, RNY, and main forums as I had time for. I learned a ton and ended up making myself a post of WLS Promises. I will share it with you!

  1. I will not panic if I stop losing weight for a few weeks. Instead, I will re-evaluate that my eating is on plan and wait until the stall has lasted 4 weeks before I start to panic.
  2. I will not ask OH what I need to take to the hospital, I know these things. Chapstick and a pillow. And the pillow really just needs to be in the car for the trip home.
  1. I will not lie when people ask me how I've lost the weight. I will either be honest and tell them "surgery, diet and exercise" or I will tell them "I'm not comfortable talking about this with you." These are the options, lying by omission is not one of them.
  1. If I screw up, and I will screw up, I will forgive myself and return immediately to plan.It's okay to screw up, it's not okay to beat myself up for it or let it become the start of a downward spiral. It's also not okay to say "I'll return to plan tomorrow."
  1. If I don't start losing sizes right away, I won't freak out. Chances are the clothes I wear now are too small and tight, and I just deal with it. It might take awhile for my current clothes to fit correctly and that will happen before I can get into smaller sizes. (This was true, I think I lost about 50 pounds before needing to buy new clothes.)
  1. I will own my mistakes. They're mine and result of my own choices, no one is ever going to hold a gun to my head and make me eat crap, I control what goes into my own body.
  1. I will not compare my weight loss to that of anyone else. I'm me.
  1. I will do everything I can to find a therapist I can work with. This will help me out in the long run. (Therapy = awesome. Our stomachs are never what make us obese - our brains do that. Surgery will fix our stomachs and give us a powerful tool, but we need to fix our brains so that we can sustain this forever.)
  1. I will be hyper aware of potential addiction transfer issues and especially aware of getting too caught up in numbers as I already know I am want to do.
  1. Extra skin is a fact of life, get the **** over it. If I really hate the way my body looks, I can save my pennies and nickels for plastic surgery once I've maintained for a year or two. People will still have sex with me if I have weird skin, and lots of places sell compression gear. I will, however, have every issue with my skin documented. (This didn't happen as planned, but hey, life rarely does. People did still have sex with me even with the weird skin.)
  1. I will be kind to myself. I will keep getting to my monthly massages, I will keep engaged in my hobbies, and I will spend time with my friends.
  1. I already know that being a "hero" about medication is stupid so I'll work on remembering that when the time comes. Pain keeps us from healing, it's not noble.
  1. I will only weigh myself once a week. I will not let myself get obsessed with the scale. See #9. (LOL, this definitely didn't happen. I weigh daily, but I don't obsess thanks to TrendWeight.)
  1. My stomach will probably gurgle after surgery, this is normal. Just don't go to silent Meeting anytime soon.
  1. I will not worry if people don't comment on my weight loss. I will assume that they're being polite and not commenting on another person's body, which is what they should do. (I wish people didn't comment on my body.)
  1. I will work to break the compulsions to "clean my plate" and to "not let food go to waste." Sure, there are starving kids in Africa, but throwing away food will not change the situation.
  1. There is nothing to be done for hair loss, assuming that I'm eating on plan. It will happen, or it won't, but I will remember that it will grow back eventually. I will be a shavee with St. Baldricks six weeks post-op. (And I've kept my hair short ever since.)
  1. I understand that my hormones (and therefore emotions) will be all messed up after surgery. I will do my best to remove myself from the company of others instead of taking my hormonal changes out on them.
  1. I won't weigh myself for the first two weeks post-op because I know that I'll gain weight from all of the fluids and swelling that surgery entail. I'll wait to weigh until I'm off liquids. (I made it one week...)

  2. I will not panic if I don't feel restriction immediately post-op. Chances are restriction won't kick in fully until I'm eating dense proteins and that will take 4-6 weeks on my plan. (This, indeed, was the case. I never had any issue with liquids.)

And things I've learned since then:

  • Life will still happen, your dad will still die, you'll need to gain all the coping skills and tools you can in order to make it through that without reverting to your old habits. But you can do it.
  • Body dysphoria is real. Take pictures of yourself with other people for reference. Take pictures of yourself in the same doorway of your home. Look at these pictures so you can get a sense of your body. Talk to your therapist about it. Time will help. It's weird to feel disconnected from your body.
  • Apparently you have an eating disorder, who knew! Thankfully your weight loss will help you feel confident enough to talk to your doctor about it and get treatment.
  • People will make all sorts of comments about your body, your hair, your clothing, etc. It's annoying.
  • Clothing is expensive. Apparently you will come to love bright colors and clothes that fit well - who knew? Good fitting bras are super important. Ditto for shoes.
  • You'll learn to love exercise and even running. What the hell? All weather running gear is expensive but totally worth every penny.
  • Your butt will hurt a lot since, apparently, there are bones there.Your PSIS (posterior superior iliac spine) will also hurt. It sucks, you'll survive.
  • You will be cold all the freaking time. You will acquire a robust jacket and coat collection as a result and learn to take a jacket of some sort everywhere you go regardless of what the temperature should be.

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 41 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Kassyyy13
on 1/26/19 5:09 pm

I can't express just how much i loved this post. It was more helpful than i could have imagined getting. I really do feel like this post is going to save me a lot of bs lmao. I really appreciate the time you took to post this for me :)

Gwen M.
on 1/27/19 6:50 am
VSG on 03/13/14

You're welcome!

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 41 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Partlypollyanna
on 1/27/19 3:14 am
RNY on 02/14/18

Omg, Gwen, #10 is my favorite. Seriously, my dragon wings are providing entertainment right now -- "if I hold my arm this angle, what shape will gravity make?" (I am easily amused)

HW: 306 SW: 282 CW:145.8 GW: 145 (reached 2/6/19), next goal - 130

Jen

Gwen M.
on 1/27/19 6:52 am
VSG on 03/13/14

Hahahaha. I love that you call them dragon wings. Just say DRACARYS and pretend you're Daenerys. :D

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 41 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Partlypollyanna
on 1/28/19 6:34 am
RNY on 02/14/18

You are so one of my people! I am the mother of dragon(wings)!

HW: 306 SW: 282 CW:145.8 GW: 145 (reached 2/6/19), next goal - 130

Jen

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