Help me my daughter doesn't want me to have surgery

Aprilgetinghealth
on 5/12/20 9:55 am

Help me my daughter doesn't want me to have surgery , I weigh over 600lbs and my daughter says I should not have surgery, and I should just eat right and exercise.What should I tell that I need surgery to help me loss weight.

hollykim
on 5/12/20 10:20 am - Nashville, TN
Revision on 03/18/15 with
On May 12, 2020 at 4:55 PM Pacific Time, Aprilgetinghealth wrote:

Help me my daughter doesn't want me to have surgery , I weigh over 600lbs and my daughter says I should not have surgery, and I should just eat right and exercise.What should I tell that I need surgery to help me loss weight.

tell her it is your life and your health and you will make your own decisions. You don't make health and medical decisions for her , do you?

it is your choice and only your choice to make.

 


          

 

Citizen Kim
on 5/12/20 7:10 pm - Castle Rock, CO

Thank her for her interest. Get your surgery.

Proud Feminist, Atheist, LGBT friend, and Democratic Socialist

btm61
on 5/13/20 2:44 am

Aprilgetinghealth,

Why doesn't she want you to have the surgery? Here's a nasty secret that I'm learning many surgeons won't tell you before having the surgery, Surgery is only a tool, it isn't an end-all. You will still have to learn to eat properly and exercise to have any long-term permanent results. I know people who have had the surgery who have had tremendous results, and I know people who had surgery who weighed significantly more a year after their surgery then they did before it. So many people, and I'm not saying you are one of them, have gone into surgery thinking that they will lose weight fast, and that is true, but the key to long term result is good eating habits and exercise. I chose not to have surgery because I was determined to do this the old-fashioned way, and it has paid big dividends for me. It is ultimately your choice to make, just be aware that eating and exercise habits will still need to change whether you have the surgery or not.

Grim_Traveller
on 5/13/20 3:24 am
RNY on 08/21/12

You make some good points. But no one weighs significantly more just a year after surgery than they do before. No one. It's not a thing.

Everyone loses a after surgery. It's impossible not to, recovering from major surgery. Yes, many people start gaining further down the road. But no one weighs more at just a year post surgery.

6'3" tall, male. Maintaining a loss of 280 pounds.

Highest weight was 475. Consult weight 04/12 was 411. RNY on 08/21/12 at 359 lbs. Current weight 195.

M1 -24; M2 -21; M3 -19; M4 -21; M5 -13; M6 -21; M7 -10; M8 -16; M9 -10; M10 -8; M11 -6; M12 -5.

btm61
on 5/13/20 4:06 am

Maybe not a year, literally, but I have a personal friend who went through the surgery, lost about 80 pounds right away and within 18 months of surgery weighed nearly 100 pounds MORE than she did before the surgery. Having just talked with her a couple of weeks ago, she was very blunt, she never altered her eating or exercise habits. Despite the timeline, which may not be 100% accurate, the point is valid, if you see the surgery as an end-all, microwave solution to a lifetime of bad habits, you WILL fail; it's a guarantee.

H.A.L.A B.
on 5/13/20 10:35 am

I had RNY. I lost app 110 lbs. I'am maintaining now at 100-110 lbs loss.

I watch some of "My 600 lbs life " series on TLC and I cant imagine someone who can gain app 100-lbs in just a couple pf months. I have no clue what and how much they eat to be able to gain that,.

Even when my food choices are poor, I can gain 10 lbs in a month.not 50.

Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG

"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"

"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."

hollykim
on 5/14/20 8:52 am - Nashville, TN
Revision on 03/18/15 with
On May 13, 2020 at 9:44 AM Pacific Time, btm61 wrote:

Aprilgetinghealth,

Why doesn't she want you to have the surgery? Here's a nasty secret that I'm learning many surgeons won't tell you before having the surgery, Surgery is only a tool, it isn't an end-all. You will still have to learn to eat properly and exercise to have any long-term permanent results. I know people who have had the surgery who have had tremendous results, and I know people who had surgery who weighed significantly more a year after their surgery then they did before it. So many people, and I'm not saying you are one of them, have gone into surgery thinking that they will lose weight fast, and that is true, but the key to long term result is good eating habits and exercise. I chose not to have surgery because I was determined to do this the old-fashioned way, and it has paid big dividends for me. It is ultimately your choice to make, just be aware that eating and exercise habits will still need to change whether you have the surgery or not.

losing weight is not the only issue. Maintaining the loss long term is the bigger problem.

l lost hundreds of pounds over the years , over and over and over.

the only way I ever maintained a weight loss was after bariatric surgery. I had surgery 10 years ago, lost 122# and have maintained that loss.

how much weight have you lost, how much do you still need to lose and how long have you maintained the loss?

 


          

 

btm61
on 5/15/20 10:00 am

Kelly,

Congratulations on your loss and maintaining it. As for me I am in a Medically Managed Program eating 3 square meals per day, plus snacks, using the USDA recommended 2000 calories per day. My last weigh-in in February, prior to our facility closing due to COVID, had me down 110 pounds total and I still have about 100 more to go, give or take. In my program I meet monthly with a RD, with a MS in Nutrition, to go over my food diary that I keep on myfitnesspal.com. I utilize a custom-tailored exercise program designed by the Exercise Physiologist at our facility and workout about 6 days per week, mixing strength (3 days per week) and cardio work (5-6 days per week) and we update that program about every 4-6 weeks. Additionally I meet with a LPN with specialized training in weight loss on a bi-monthly basis to make sure I'm on track medically and psychologically as well. Together these three people and their support staff keep me on track, and while there are bumps in the road to be sure, they also insure that I don't allow myself to dwell on my failures and that I get up, dust myself off, and get going again. It has been a life-altering experience for me and my family as well.

btm61
on 5/15/20 10:03 am

I'm sorry I meant to post my response to Hollykim, not Kelly. sorry about that.

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