Do you tell people that you have had weight loss surgery?

on 6/15/20 7:40 am

I am hoping to have weight loss surgery this fall at the latest. I am on the fence about if I want to tell my friends, family and coworkers about the surgery. My husband of course will know but part of me wants to ask him to not share my surgery with any one else. I just want to lose weight and not have to explain myself. Has anyone here felt the same way? Or am I over thinking it all?

on 6/15/20 7:47 am

I don't advertise that I had surgery but if someone asks I am honest with them. Since I have experienced regain it has been harder for me to say that I had surgery but I think that is a good thing because it drives me to stay focused to lose it. It is an individual preference so do what is right for YOU.

This is a good question because I have a friend who had surgery after I did. She told everyone that she lost it all on her own even when asked if she had surgery she said no. I do get that she didn't want to state that she had surgery but I also felt like she wasn't being truthful with herself and that at some point it might backfire on her. It did, she lost weight, but didn't change her eating habits or learn from her previous mistakes and gained back all her weight. I feel very bad for her.

on 6/15/20 8:03 am
VSG on 06/11/18

I recommend that you wait until after the surgery to tell them. The problem is that most people don't know much about WLS, and have only heard horror stories. As a result, they will probably try to talk you out of it, telling you to "just diet and exercise more". Probably most of your friends will be supportive, but it only takes one know-it-all to be extremely annoying. We've heard from a lot of people on here who have one relative or friend who just doesn't understand.

After surgery, you are more likely to get a better reaction. It's a done deal, so people usually won't waste time telling you that it was a bad decision. And if you wait until your weight loss is apparent, even skeptics will usually come around.

Liz WantsHealthForAll
on 6/15/20 1:19 pm - Cape Cod, MA
VSG on 03/28/16

I only told close family prior to surgery and until I made goal. Then I told others when they asked how I lost the weight so I could help educate them about the benefits of WLS if they were interested.

Liz 5'3" HW: 219 SW: 185 GW: 125 LW: 113 Desired maintenance range: 120-123 CW: 120 (after losing 20 lb. regain)!

on 6/15/20 3:48 pm

At first, I didn't tell many people but now that I am 12 years out... I could care less who knows because no one has the right to tell me what I can and can't do for my health. I am the healthiest I have been in my entire life and weigh less than I did in high school and feel better now than I did back then.

Best decision ever

T Hagalicious Rebel

on 6/15/20 6:12 pm - Brooklyn
VSG on 04/25/14 with

I didn't tell anybody. I didn't want their 2 cents & I didn't want to feel as if I was on display. Plus I figure it's none of their business.

When the weight was coming off, & when people asked, I did tell them about the surgery, as well as all the work I did afterwards. I didn't want them to think it was just diet & exercise, even though in the end that's what it came down to, the surgery just gave me a fighting chance that frankly most normies, as I call them, wouldn't understand.

No one surgery is better than the other, what works for one may not work for another. T-Rebel

Laura in Texas
on 6/16/20 7:46 am
RNY on 09/17/08 with

I know this is a personal decision. There is no right or wrong answer. You have to do what is best for you and your mental state.

If you choose to tell people, I agree with the others who said to wait until after surgery. I heard way too many horror stories from people who knew people who knew people who knew people who DIED from weight loss surgery. I do know some people do die after weight loss surgery, but those cases are definitely not the norm. I know there is danger in any surgery but you would think everyone is dying from it from the stories I heard. It was mentally exhausting!!

I do tell people now. I am almost 12 years out and a normal weight. I do not have any health issues due to surgery and my labs are good. People need to hear more stories from those of us who have good health now due in big part to weight loss surgery.

Laura in Texas

53 years old; 5'7" tall; HW: 339 (BMI=53); GW: 140 CW: 170 (BMI=27)

RNY: 09-17-08 Dr. Garth Davis

brachioplasty: 12-18-09 Dr. Wainwright; lbl/bl: 06-28-11 Dr. LoMonaco

"May your choices reflect your hopes and not your fears."

on 6/16/20 10:57 am - Chicago, IL

I totally agree.




Janet P.
on 6/17/20 3:58 am

I was completely open about my WLS, but I know many people who chose not to share. If you don't want to share, then don't. If someone asks, you can tell them you had gallbladder surgery. Or you can simply tell them you've decided to get healthy and lose weight, period.

Janet in Leesburg
DS 2/25/03
Hazem Elariny

on 6/28/20 6:18 pm - Sonora, CA

I don't mind telling people. It has almost been 14 years for me.