What do you say to someone who is misinformed or against surgery?

Short and sweet!

You have received some very good advice already but I will just share what I did and what I learned for myself. I was very open as I have lived my life as an open book in most areas; however, I learned that may not have been the best decision because, well, not everyone that smiles at you is your friend. I have had people make mean spirited comments about my weight loss and (personal not related to surgery and not knowing all of the medical facts) medical complications. I have done my research and need no convincing that WLS is backed by science as a very effective tool for medical issues stemming from obesity. But I am not the idiot whisperer. If I sense that someone is truly interested I might direct them to some sources where they can do their own research but I have learned to just share less because of being hurt, either intentionally or ignorantly. It is NOT the easy way unless you want to compare it to perhaps having a washing machine instead of beating my laundry against rocks down by the creek as equal measures. ;) It is a tool. A very effective tool but we must make many changes if we want long-term success and everyone has a different experience. I will also share that not everyone who knows how "easy" WLS is will choose it, even if they know it would take away many health issues. We decided it was the best choice for ourselves for whatever reason(s). I don't regret it. I learned a lot and it wasn't just the weight. I did have improvements in several serious health issues stemming from obesity and gained some other health issues but I played the hand I was dealt as an informed medical consumer and I am very, very grateful that I had this opportunity. I have learned that people have different priorities, however. It is often easier for someone else to make up excuses as to why they don't want to change their lives when they see that other people ARE.

hahahah "I am not the idiot whisperer".......that Is one of the best lines I've read today.

I laughed entirely too hard at "I am not the Idiot whisperer", but it's so true!

I never thought of comparing it to other aspects of life, as you explain. I get that everyone has a different experience and knows of different experiences. It is more than the weight for me as well.

Thank you very much for your feedback. You put it into ways to really help me understand. But there is no guarantee that others will understand and I have to learn that as I go, I guess!

I am almost 3 years Post Op and I have heard many different takes on what and how people handle how they discuss there surgery. For me I was very vocal about my surgery, I knew several people who had surgery that kept it a secret and a few who spoke about it if they were asked. I decided to make myself accountable by announcing it to the world. I did face a lot of negativity, judgement, being told I was taking the easy way out and still to this day people have said to me, "Well, You just had surgery". I will tell you first hand there is nothing easy about this process at all, it is a lifelong commitment to change. It isn't a magic pill, it is work, constantly reminding myself that I had the surgery for my health and I need to stay on track. I never had a problem with being fat, I had a problem with being sick, with not being able to move, breathe and do things with my kids. I had a problem with being stuck in bed and just waiting to die. I know you said you don't want to shout it from the rooftops but I have and continue to because it has been a miracle! No more walker, no more oxygen, no longer on 26 medications, no longer hospitalized every other week, I HAD BARIATRIC/ WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY AND IT HAS CHANGED MY LIFE FOR THE BETTER IN SO MANY WAYS!! Feel free to connect and reach out. There are so many of us on here who have walked in the shoes you are walking in, it seems scary and it is different in some ways for each one of us but we all are similar as well in some way. Spread Kindness Like Glitter Lezette Christine Mua

First, I love your ending. Spread kindness like glitter. Thank you so much for your feedback and I appreciate you taking the time to tell me a bit about your experience. I am not looking for things to be easy. I want to put in the work and learn HOW to cope with things.

My first recommendation is to decide it that person is worth your time and energy. Friend or foe, of sorts. do they want to be educated because they are curious or are they "going to try" and discourage you from making a decision about your health.

Another member alluded to this same thing and It's going to be hard at first because I am usually so open about things but I am learning to keep my mouth shut for others to alleviate some stresses, goes a long way for my mental health.

The question is why do you feel a need to respond to negativity. You are TELLING them what you are doing, not ASKING them. They can like it or not. No one needs your (or mine or anyone else's) intellectual instruction on WLS. They think what they think. If they really wanted to research it, I'm sure they have access to Google. The best way to handle it is by being a living example of what WLS can do for a person. Watching you thrive will be what makes them rethink their position.

Very true. I guess I have always been the type of person feel like I need to explain myself since I was younger. It's hard to try and prepare for something I know a little about